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Is it a personal offense for someone to question your type?

Red Memories

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short answer: No.

long answer: I think sometimes when people change your type just to attack you about something about yourself then yes it is offensive. but just suggesting you are some type isn't hostile. Honestly, I'm growing sick of these users acting like suggesting a type besides the one they think, even when they ask, is a personal attack. If you don't want to hear it, do not ask. If you do not plan to discuss it peacefully, do not ask. If you do not want your theory of typology questioned, get off a discussion forum.
 

Merced

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This is, if anything as “passive aggressive” as this thread. In which, if you defend yourself by saying it isnt- Ill just point out that me making this thread wasnt intended passive aggresively either and having motives attributed to you HERE is at least as fair as this post that you just wrote.

I get you dont like me, whatever, but this wasnt cool

How is "I hate this" passive aggressive? I answered the thread's prompt, I share that I dislike the thread, and I explain why. Have beef with me not liking it but accurately describe why you have beef. Whether or not I like you doesn't change my stance on the thread.
 

Lark

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short answer: No.

long answer: I think sometimes when people change your type just to attack you about something about yourself then yes it is offensive. but just suggesting you are some type isn't hostile. Honestly, I'm growing sick of these users acting like suggesting a type besides the one they think, even when they ask, is a personal attack. If you don't want to hear it, do not ask. If you do not plan to discuss it peacefully, do not ask. If you do not want your theory of typology questioned, get off a discussion forum.

There are prejudices and negative labelling associated with types on this forum for sure, sensing is considered inferior to intuition, is something associated with dysfunction or disorder and autism.

Which is ironic given its the total opposite to what Jung, at least, considered himself and meant when he was writing about it, I cant find the quotes but I've definitely read them where he suggested that intuition give way to sensing in a sort maturational or developmental curve or that people try to develop those traits, or maybe it was that he was trying to develop those traits, I dont remember exactly.

Similar to that is the reaction that suggesting Sherlock Holmes was an ISTJ provoked but people have written entire books about that, I think I know of at least two.
 

prplchknz

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depends on their intentions, I've been called a sensor as a synonym as stupid. but others are sincere so it comes down to sincere vs unsincere
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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Questioning someone's type or suggesting an alternative is fine, especially if you can support it with evidence/examples, and if you can do it with courtesy. Insisting you know someone better than they do, and that their self-typing must be wrong, well, that is disrespectul, presumptuous, and highly likely to be wrong. Yes, we all have blind spots and the observations of (often disinterested) others can offer insight into them. That being said, what we present here is likely only part of who we are, one persona or subset of our total person. It is far from the whole picture. However imperfect our self-knowledge, it is likely more comprehensive than what another member here knows about us.
 

Red Memories

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How is "I hate this" passive aggressive? I answered the thread's prompt, I share that I dislike the thread, and I explain why. Have beef with me not liking it but accurately describe why you have beef. Whether or not I like you doesn't change my stance on the thread.

Not to quote you negatively, but technically you asked in the post what kind of passive aggressive shit happened while you were gone. I think she was referencing THAT comment.
 

Frosty

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No, it's not a personal attack to question someone's type. There is, however, a line that people can cross like overstating their opinion of someone's type or getting offended when that interpretation of their typing is rejected. Not gonna lie, I can't see how the premise of this thread isn't a veiled attempt to justify doing those things. It's one of those self explanatory things where asking about it is a little incriminating y'know? Yeah, it's a typology forum, but when does that mean you get a say in my identity? Commenting on someone's hair isn't a personal attack, but if you keep hounding them about it, it's still harassment.

Even then, it'd be one thing if this type of harassment was analytical or viable in a way that is objective, but it rarely is. At best it's like "I lurked on your blog and you're an XXXX" followed by constantly reminding them "I think XXXX" when not asked. Then again, that's just a bad understanding of typology in general. If someone really feels that strong a need to correct someone else's identity, then they don't have a good grasp of the theory to begin with, hence their need to correct other people.

The 'it's a typology forum' argument should be about the theory, not a person's personal application of it. Not everyone here writes a blog that reveals aspects of their introspection. Some people literally only talk about typology, how are you supposed to deduce their fears and wishes from that? The more I type the more I hate the premise of this thread, lmao. What kind of passive aggressive shit has been going on since I left?

“ Not gonna lie, I can't see how the premise of this thread isn't a veiled attempt to justify doing those things. It's one of those self explanatory things where asking about it is a little incriminating y'know?

What kind of passive aggressive shit has been going on since I left?“


This is the part I take issue with. It just doesnt seem very fair to me to come into a thread, accuse the maker of a bunch of negative things, and then when called out on it play dumb.

But whatever. I dont see this going ANYWHERE positively, which is why Ive avoided coming back to this thread.

Comment back if you like, but Im not going to respond. Because I know how this ends
 

Merced

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“ Not gonna lie, I can't see how the premise of this thread isn't a veiled attempt to justify doing those things. It's one of those self explanatory things where asking about it is a little incriminating y'know?

What kind of passive aggressive shit has been going on since I left?“


This is the part I take issue with. It just doesnt seem very fair to me to come into a thread, accuse the maker of a bunch of negative things, and then when called out on it play dumb.

But whatever. I dont see this going ANYWHERE positively, which is why Ive avoided coming back to this thread.

Comment back if you like, but Im not going to respond. Because I know how this ends

Who's playing dumb? This thread is passive aggressive. I am actively calling it a bad thread.
 

Red Memories

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Who's playing dumb? This thread is passive aggressive. I am actively calling it a bad thread.

If you feel the thread is passive aggressive

you should report the thread.

Nevertheless, there was a time on here that a lot of people were acting very negatively towards type discussion where another type was questioned, and I think during this time Frosty chose to ask where the line is. I think it is a very fair question since I was struggling to see the line myself. Some people enjoyed the input and others appeared to snap back in your face and hate you for questioning their type, even if they asked for an opinion. I do not find this thread an inch passive aggressive, but perhaps it was because I was there for what basis the thread may have. I find the thread beneficial as I get a clear word from some of those exact people, what they find the line to be. Why they see it the way THEY do. And I appreciate having that knowledge of while I rarely find it negative, why others may take it worse than say me, you, or frosty do.

The way you put your argument in that post was hostile at the least, not trying to fathom or understand the purpose of the thread. There was no hostility behind this thread that I know of, and anyone who has seen it Frosty took the time to have a POSITIVE discourse with, explaining she sees more of this happening among newer members, where they dislike having their type discussed, and she wanted to understand where they were coming from. Trying to understand someone and have an open conversation is never hostile. This didn't, and still does not, need to be a fight.

I hope you can see perhaps where this was coming from. I have no hard feelings at this point towards you or Frosty (and I think everyone knows from the past I've had fights with both of you, so this isn't me taking a side necessarily).

But I must also ask for factual input, what makes this thread passive aggressive? It is not passive aggressive to call upon a collective behavior and ask why they respond the way they do in an attempt to build a bridge rather than burn it. It is within the nature of reason. Do you have proof that this was made passive aggressively? You are making a claim and when you make a claim you also have to back up the claim. Because your claim could be considered reportable.

That is all.
 

Red Memories

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Also I believe her suggesting you are playing dumb, is when you suggest the thread was made passive aggressively, you are insulting the person who made the thread, therefore you are insulting frosty by calling her passive aggressive. You are saying you merely said you hated the thread. Frankly, I have had many typology discussions with Frosty and she had very rarely taken anything negatively. I know of a few members I could think of who have done this in the past, the thing this thread discusses, and I always wanted to know why they responded as they did. This helped make that bridge to understanding. You also insinuated she partakes in the act and was looking to defend her behavior in the way you wrote the post, when this behavior isn't common to her. Instead of attempting to understand, you made this an unnecessarily hostile discussion. If you find this thread passive aggressive or negative, either DO NOT PARTAKE IN THE DISCUSSION, or report the thread. I have seen many threads in the past I disliked and I chose merely to disclude myself from them. This is your decision to make.
 

Connoisseur

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I used to get defensive when something contradicted the type I believed myself to be- not too beneficial, and that was the reason I was mistyping myself left and right.
 
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I feel that Questioning my type means doubting me as my type I have identified myself as, and getting suspicious that I want to be a certain type I am actually not, or I guess that the "typers "might think that I could just play act as if I were a certain type. If the question is whether I feel offended, my answer is: no. I realize in public forum, every discussion participant is free to tell that they might think that I was not the type I have typed myself as. I just wonder how could I get a free identification while some official assessment is commercialized, that I do not need to pay any penny for the typology typing. The typers seemed to work voluntarily for me. Every discussion participant should be ready and understand that some may not agree with their own identification.
I think there is no point of trying to hold myself as not my type if I am proven mistyped. The most important thing in typology is to correctly understand myself as myself and also try understanding others as themselves.
 
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Pionart

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I think it's natural to be a bit offended, but really, if you have information to share with someone that you feel is beneficial and true, then why not share it?
 

tony_goth

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Questioning my type in a detailed manner is no offence. Otherwise it's an offence.
 

Sacrophagus

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Ho, a personal offense? I, personally, wouldn't take it like that. I'll probably find it amusing.

We have specific types self-proclaiming archetypes patrols. He will challenge your ENTJ-ness (He's ESTJ, actually). She will challenge your ENFPness (She's ENFJ, actually). Let them sink in their self-induced psychosis. We show pity for these belligerent people for they can't forge an identity without such an apparatus, and have to validate themselves by projecting on others. Know that they will have to protect that identity by questioning yours, for in their crippled sense of self, if they can't see themselves in you, you are not what you claim to be. Give no fucks about them.

The second type is those who go imbibe typology books or articles and think that gives them the sanctimonious authority of an infallible opinion. No. Stand right there in the corner with your nose pushed as far into the wall crevice as possible, hands in the air, left foot in the air then switch to right foot in the air again and again until I call you for dinner. You've been naughty. Also, if you could sing 'Satan gave me a Taco' backwards, that would be nice.

*sigh*

I'm the same asshole whether IRL or IVL, but I realize a ton of people seem very different IRL.



Yep. Basically, the petty defenders with their "That sounded very *type you don't identify as* here".
---

There are people who know themselves better than others, and people who wouldn't trust you unless you're able to see them beyond the outlines. We all watch the same thing but can never see the same thing after all.

If I were to tell [MENTION=31348]Peter Deadpan[/MENTION] that she's an ISFJ, she'll probably cross her arms, pout, and tell me "Pffft, you know me better than that" before looking the other way in disapproval. Because damn her and her 458ness (or not). Deep down that fucker knows I accept her with all I can and cannot see.

Another fool who would try the same thing out of a haughty and unsolicited perspective and he will probably have a hard time recovering from the humiliation he inflicted upon himself.



Coming back to the subject of my arrogant I, I don't identify as a type. If my day to day tendencies and the way I enterprise my people, my family, my business and life goals are governed by ENTJ qualities, I don't care that much. I know better than coin the many insanities of my poised and ambitious self into a mere four letters. The pretentious simpleton on the internet will try to psychoanalyze, and to my own entertainment, he will fall in the most transcendental paradoxes.

-Kim: I came to tell you that you are ExFJ.
-Me: Oh, interesting. Sit down, have some chips and tell me more.
-You just gave me chips which means you're giving.
-Shit man. I can't hide anything from you.
-You're also good with people, especially women. Only F people are good with people.
-Man. You, you are something. Continue.
-The other day you were laughing.
-Like right now? Hahahaha?
-Yes! You also make jokes!
-I should've known they were ESFJ jokes.
-Yes! They are!
-Did you know that I am one hell of a cook too?
-I wouldn't be surprised! That is so ESFJ!
-Ah, the things you don't know, man. The things you don't know.
-Remember that one time when you were comforting that woman?
-Don't tell me. That's also ESFJ?
-YES! It can't get anymore ESFJ than that!
-Oh yes, it can. I love my family.
-Oh my god! Congratulations!
-I NEED A HUG.

*sips tea*




Ah, the swarms of buffoons on this site. This will always remain relevant.
 

Tilt

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I have had people tell me I am either an INFJ or ESFJ. I just don't relate to Ni dominance or Si. I am a stubborn as fuck, brutally honest variety of Fe.
 

nerdy anthropoid

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You see when someone questions your type it doesn't necessarily mean they know you better than you know yourself. It could just mean that they have more (or perhaps less) understanding of the MBTI than you. Knowledge of MBTI aside, you need a certain degree of self-awareness and objectivity about your personality to make an accurate assessment. And there is nothing wrong with someone questioning your type if they do so nicely. As always, if one is truly interested in learning, one must remain open to the possibility of being wrong.
 

The Cat

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I'm here for the music.
 

Yuurei

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Ah, the swarms of buffoons on this site. This will always remain relevant.

Some people question my type ( but you know that). Fortunately I'm secure enough to not give two shits what some rando on the internet thinks they know about me.

As for the OP's question, depends on the context. Some do it genuinely, and no, I don't think it's an insult.

Others do just to insult but then it's pretty meaningless. Like the time someone said " nu uh! You're and ESFP!" Really? Really buddy? You wanna say I'm ESTJ , sure but SF is just something NT's say to insult other NTs so it's clearly meant to offend rather than be a sincere questioning.
 

Venus Rose

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I don't really see it as a "personal offense" but more so cruel when the person on the receiving end is literally being steamrolled over, and they cannot defend themselves. When they are purposely being portrayed as being "wrong" to the public with little real interest in where the person is actually coming from. Frankly I don't do well with any approach that attempts to break down facades to expose someone because I don't really have any.

And then you have the issue that some of those with insecure attachment styles may not know themselves, and that is not their fault - it is being psychological maimed and "left open," and they cannot conjure up a secure attachment and a solid sense of self for themselves out of nowhere. They are vulnerable, and it's not from a lack of trying or whatever; it's a genuine psychological inability due to wounding.

Basically, I don't like when someone who is gentle and good is seemingly subjected to 'attacks' - even small ones - when they cannot defend themselves from it. How can that be fair? Also, people with a weaker sense of self will likely be suggestible almost like a child would at times; making it easy to abuse them, and convince them that they are doing things they aren't, that they are someone they are not.

Unwelcome opinion I guess is what I am thinking of. Also there is nothing to "expose" or chip away for some people - what they are telling you is true, they are genuine. And then if you subject them to that anyway, that will only further confuse them. They don't understand this kind of thing.
 
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