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Counter-phobic?

Sineva

New member
Joined
Jun 28, 2018
Messages
34
I've been sometimes told during personality typing discussions that I'm counterphobic.

I've looked up the general meaning of it, but I'm kinda uncertain whether it really applies to me.

Counterphobic attitude is a response to anxiety that, instead of fleeing the source of fear in the manner of a phobia, actively seeks it out, in the hope of overcoming the original anxiousness.

This description gives me the image of a daredevil who tries to overcome all of his fears, by actively provoking a confrontation with them. For example, a person who fears heights - goes base-jumping, or a person who fears blood and injuries goes to a hospital to look at all the sick and injured.

I don't provoke confrontation with my enemies/fears, and most of the time prefer to avoid my fears all together. But if the person/thing that I fear actively attempts to challenge me, I tend to jump into the fight with extreme enthusiasm and aggression, and am willing to risk it all, just to defeat whomever attempts to induce feelings of fear or weakness/inferiority in me. Rather than seeking to challenge my fears/phobias, my impulse is more related to feelings of pride, self-value/worth, and "power hierarchies".
My subconscious reasoning goes along the lines of: "You dare to attack my good reputation/standing/dignity/self-value by making me seem or feel fearful/weak? I'll rip your throat out with my bare teeth, even if it costs me my life!"

Would this classify as counter-phobic, or is this more of a Ni/Se, Se/Ni induced phenomenon, or a Fi/Fe induced phenomenon?
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,187
MBTI Type
BELF
Enneagram
594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I don't provoke confrontation with my enemies/fears, and most of the time prefer to avoid my fears all together. But if the person/thing that I fear actively attempts to challenge me, I tend to jump into the fight with extreme enthusiasm and aggression, and am willing to risk it all, just to defeat whomever attempts to induce feelings of fear or weakness/inferiority in me. Rather than seeking to challenge my fears/phobias, my impulse is more related to feelings of pride, self-value/worth, and "power hierarchies".

My subconscious reasoning goes along the lines of: "You dare to attack my good reputation/standing/dignity/self-value by making me seem or feel fearful/weak? I'll rip your throat out with my bare teeth, even if it costs me my life!"

So why do you think you have such a fierce response to having your reputation or dignity challenged?

(It's just a question, because for perspective, some folks who are internally assured of their reputation/dignity just slough such criticisms off and don't feel the need to respond so aggressively. Not everyone responds the way you have described yourself.)
 

Sineva

New member
Joined
Jun 28, 2018
Messages
34
So why do you think you have such a fierce response to having your reputation or dignity challenged?

(It's just a question, because for perspective, some folks who are internally assured of their reputation/dignity just slough such criticisms off and don't feel the need to respond so aggressively. Not everyone responds the way you have described yourself.)

As I've noticed today, it's not only limited to reputation/dignity. Whenever I'm walking on the street, if I see someone who passes me and/or walks faster than me, I'm instinctively provoked to walk faster and surpass him. If I see someone climbing high, I'm instinctively provoked to climb higher than him. (be it physically or socially)
I hate the feeling of being left behind or of "not being good enough". I want to be on top of everything.

As for this:

some folks who are internally assured of their reputation/dignity just slough such criticisms off and don't feel the need to respond so aggressively

My honest opinion is that they're idiots. (this isn't meant as an insult, but as a general observation, that they're intellectually limited, because...) Only gods / deities / divine beings can be fully assured of their reputation/dignity, because only they can be assured of their invulnerability and omnipotence. Whomever is sure of himself, his status, and his abilities, to the extent of brushing off all challenges and criticisms, is pretending to be divine, will suffer a huge drop in his vigilance, and as result will psychologically open himself to attacks which he will neither be able to defend against nor brush off.

When you were a mere spermatozoid, you didn't reach the egg by brushing off challenges and feeling assured of your status.

I guess my general impulse, is to have maximum vigilance, maximum caution, and to always seek to be on top of every situation and on top of every challenge. There are absolutely no assured things in life. And if you're not quick on your feet, you will learn the harsh realities of life the hard way.

The only thing I genuinely think it's worth to feel confident about and assured of, is the choices you've made in life. There's no point crying over spilled milk, or brooding in thoughts about past mistakes. Being stuck in the past just kills you, emotionally and physically, and kills those who surround you. It's worth to feel confident in your past choices, and if you can't feel confident about them, it's worth to pretend confidence in your past choices. Feeling so gives you a stronger foothold in life, and attracts admiration.
 

Nomendei

Elegance of chaos
Joined
Jan 8, 2018
Messages
652
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx
As I've noticed today, it's not only limited to reputation/dignity. Whenever I'm walking on the street, if I see someone who passes me and/or walks faster than me, I'm instinctively provoked to walk faster and surpass him. If I see someone climbing high, I'm instinctively provoked to climb higher than him. (be it physically or socially)
I hate the feeling of being left behind or of "not being good enough". I want to be on top of everything.

As for this:



My honest opinion is that they're idiots. (this isn't meant as an insult, but as a general observation, that they're intellectually limited, because...) Only gods / deities / divine beings can be fully assured of their reputation/dignity, because only they can be assured of their invulnerability and omnipotence. Whomever is sure of himself, his status, and his abilities, to the extent of brushing off all challenges and criticisms, is pretending to be divine, will suffer a huge drop in his vigilance, and as result will psychologically open himself to attacks which he will neither be able to defend against nor brush off.

When you were a mere spermatozoid, you didn't reach the egg by brushing off challenges and feeling assured of your status.

I guess my general impulse, is to have maximum vigilance, maximum caution, and to always seek to be on top of every situation and on top of every challenge. There are absolutely no assured things in life. And if you're not quick on your feet, you will learn the harsh realities of life the hard way.

The only thing I genuinely think it's worth to feel confident about and assured of, is the choices you've made in life. There's no point crying over spilled milk, or brooding in thoughts about past mistakes. Being stuck in the past just kills you, emotionally and physically, and kills those who surround you. It's worth to feel confident in your past choices, and if you can't feel confident about them, it's worth to pretend confidence in your past choices. Feeling so gives you a stronger foothold in life, and attracts admiration.

Interesting, very interesting. I finally found someone who sincerely tingles my curiosity. Definitively.
I know extremely little about you. I ignore your social status, your age, your education, your culture, your nationality. I ignore absolutely everything about you. But for certain, if I would have met you in real life, I would absolutely mess the whole time with you. My whole life has been a competition, and I adore to prove to others that I’m better than them. Unfortunately, there’s a lot I deeply desire to say to you in front of everyone, but I don’t need another warning message. Thus, to resume, I say: “I’ll wait on you.”.
Concerning the counter-phobic thing, you are not. Your just obsessed. On a dangerous level. I mean, even on a metaphorical scale your "You dare to attack my good reputation/standing/dignity/self-value by making me seem or feel fearful/weak? I'll rip your throat out with my bare teeth, even if it costs me my life!" seems a bit radical.






Only gods / deities / divine beings can be fully assured of their reputation/dignity, because only they can be assured of their invulnerability and omnipotence.

God-of-war-kratos-dad-jokes.png
 

Sineva

New member
Joined
Jun 28, 2018
Messages
34
Concerning the counter-phobic thing, you are not. Your just obsessed. On a dangerous level.

It could be an obsession, but then again, it's also fully rationalized on an intellectual level. My understanding of the world can be summed up by the works of Nietzsche and Machiavelli.
In short, the world is unforgiving chaos, and only those who can rise above chaos will succeed/survive. I am consciously and logically able to interpret every phenomenon and situation from this position, and I am convinced that it's the absolute objective description of the world one could come up with.

My only mistake/shortcoming can be that my way of handling chaos is still pretty infantile, impulsive, aggressive. But we all grow with time, don't we?
 

Nomendei

Elegance of chaos
Joined
Jan 8, 2018
Messages
652
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx
It could be an obsession, but then again, it's also fully rationalized on an intellectual level. My understanding of the world can be summed up by the works of Nietzsche and Machiavelli.
In short, the world is unforgiving chaos, and only those who can rise above chaos will succeed/survive. I am consciously and logically able to interpret every phenomenon and situation from this position, and I am convinced that it's the absolute objective description of the world one could come up with.

My only mistake/shortcoming can be that my way of handling chaos is still pretty infantile, impulsive, aggressive. But we all grow with time, don't we?

We all grow with time, your right. And the path we choose is always different. I prefer to be the cause of chaos. This gives me a great advantage: I know it’s origin.
 

Sineva

New member
Joined
Jun 28, 2018
Messages
34
We all grow with time, your right. And the path we choose is always different. I prefer to be the cause of chaos. This gives me a great advantage: I know it’s origin.

I enjoy being the cause of chaos as well.
I never said it's necessary to get rid of chaos, but controlling and being "on top" of chaos requires an enormous amount of skill and vigilance.
Stirring up chaos without having the ability to control it is equivalent to playing with water without knowing how to swim.
 
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