User Tag List

First 12345 Last

Results 21 to 30 of 69

  1. #21
    ฬᎥɬⲥhฯ ฬ๏ოᥑռ Luminous's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    925 sx/sp
    Socionics
    ✨ Fi
    Posts
    6,306

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Hermit Of The Forest View Post
    It's not really a question of measurement, but whether or not you feel as though you are asking more than you think you should.
    This is a complex issue. I don't think I ask for more than I should, but that is likely because I have expectations that people in certain spheres of my life are going to provide an emotional connection. That may be how they end up in the sphere they are in - trust, being able to communicate at a deeper level, being able to lean on each other, support.

    I think it's likely that on average people would say I am needy with certain people. Because, with people in the inner spheres, I want to have connections that are deeper than average. And that requires give and take.

    There's also the issue of what kind of validation we're speaking of. Romantic love? Desirability? Intelligence? Competence? And how we need to have the validation communicated... Verbally? Publicly? Privately? Subtly?
    Likes Hermit of the Forest liked this post

  2. #22
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    2,446

    Default

    In certain ways, yes. But, at the same time, I am fairly emotionally distant...people rarely know the extent of my anxiety.
    Likes Hermit of the Forest liked this post

  3. #23
    nunc rosa cras fex senza tema's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    471 sx/sp
    Posts
    2,547

    Default

    Not anymore, I'm not.
    Likes Hermit of the Forest liked this post

  4. #24
    ⋆✦⋆ Hiraeth's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Posts
    1,746

    Default

    No. If anything, I should be more emotionally open with others because I'm naturally very closed off. It's usually when I'm having a dilemma of sorts where I'd seek support from someone close to me. Or if I'm feeling insecure about something, then I'd ask them for reassurance/clarification. With that said, I was more emotionally needy as teenager compared to now.

  5. #25
    Can't be satisfied. Peter Deadpan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Posts
    6,411

    Default

    I decided to ask my boyfriend so I could be sure I wasn't lying to myself. He said I'm not typically emotionally needy, but we both agreed that I need someone who can help me manage my emotions (talk me down from a ledge) in a logical but sympathetic manner. Basically, it's best I have a caring hand to help me manage stress.

    To some, I suppose that would be needy.
    Perpetual mood


    "It is not the personality's task to tell the truth,
    but to seem to, try to, or try to seem to."


    Philip Trussell

    Likes Hermit of the Forest, cascadeco liked this post

  6. #26
    Silver and Lead Galena's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    4w5 sx/so
    Posts
    3,860

    Default

    Deep down, yes, but I am absolutely aware that it can be too much and am willing to carefully measure it out, just deal with going without, or even live life a little differently from others to manage it and its impact on the world. I do not expect outlets for it, and where I can remove the filter, do not expect that it's something I can do regularly. Those who have given me feedback in these terms don't see me as needy.

    ISFP
    4w5 1w2 7w6 sx/so
    Likes Hermit of the Forest liked this post

  7. #27
    Somber and irritated cascadeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    9w1 sp/sx
    Posts
    8,462

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Peter Deadpan View Post
    I decided to ask my boyfriend so I could be sure I wasn't lying to myself. He said I'm not typically emotionally needy, but we both agreed that I need someone who can help me manage my emotions (talk me down from a ledge) in a logical but sympathetic manner. Basically, it's best I have a caring hand to help me manage stress.

    To some, I suppose that would be needy.
    This might be true of me as well.

    But I think probably generally, via how I was raised / the sorts of parents I had (non-sharing/ non-emotional), as well as just my own introversion and fact I've lived on my own for a really long time, I'm on the other end, where people would rather I be more 'emotionally needy'.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

    My Photography and Watercolor Fine Art Prints!!! Cascade Colors Fine Art Prints

  8. #28
    Senior Member 1487610420's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    10,000

    Default

    yep, totes, 100%, af

  9. #29
    cute lil war dog Bush's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Enneagram
    3w4 sp/so
    Socionics
    ILI Te
    Posts
    5,274

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Kanye69 View Post
    I hate sharing my feelings, and I don't really like other people's feelings. Like, not because I don't care, but because I don't know how to handle them. I want to help them, but I don't know what to say. I still want people to feel like they can come to me with their problems, but I don't think I'm of too too much use in that respect. Maybe I'm too critical of myself in this respect 🤷.
    -Kanye69
    You're probably not giving yourself enough credit.

    I like helping people. I like helping arm folks with tools that give them peace in their situation and confidence to act. What I had to learn, though, is that if someone's suffering some emotional turmoil, then their 'problem' isn't actually the problem right then, at that immediate moment -- those negative feelings are. So if I jump into advice-giving mode straight away, I'm working on the wrong problem.

    Some folks how to handle others' feelings -- kissing boo-boos and fixing up some hot cocoa and all. Not me; I'm not that intimate, I'll never be that intimate, and I don't have a damn clue on how to navigate those waters. But since I'm pretty calm by nature, I can offer up a pressure relief valve. It's not a direct fix, but it's a catalyst for it.

    So my go-to tactic is to give them room to talk it out, chiming in with some honest solidarity where I can ("that sounds awful!" .. if something actually does sound awful). As the conversation rolls on, I also learn more about the 'problem' itself.

    Build your similarities before you point out your differences. Establish enough common ground that it becomes clear to them that you're looking at the 'problem' in the same way. And when you're both at the point where the 'problem' is the problem, then you can work your 'problem'-solving magic.
    J. Scott Crothers
    Founder, Truthtology, est. 1952
    Prophet and Channel, God Almighty
    Author, the Holy scripture Elevenetics

    "Just as jet fuel cannot melt steel beams, so too cannot the unshakeable pillars of Truthtology ever be shaken, whether by man, nature, or evidence."
    - Elevenetics

  10. #30
    Can't be satisfied. Peter Deadpan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Posts
    6,411

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by phobik View Post
    yep, totes, 100%, af
    I've actually been meaning to talk to you about this...
    Perpetual mood


    "It is not the personality's task to tell the truth,
    but to seem to, try to, or try to seem to."


    Philip Trussell

    Likes Hermit of the Forest, 1487610420 liked this post

Similar Threads

  1. How do you process emotion?
    By Ravenetta in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 39
    Last Post: 10-20-2019, 08:08 PM
  2. [INFP] INFPs, Do you detach emotionally in moments of crisis?
    By CrystalViolet in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 43
    Last Post: 09-21-2009, 07:22 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO