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  1. #1
    Senior Member Frosty's Avatar
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    Default Birth Order and Personality

    There are theories that birth order influences personality. What do you think? Do you relate to your description or not? Do you think your birth order shaped the personlity of you, your siblings, your parents, or anyone else you know- or is it just garbage?

    Here are some traits of different birth orders.

    First born

    Firstborn

    As the leader of the pack, firstborns often tend to be:

    Reliable
    Conscientious
    Structured
    Cautious
    Controlling
    Achievers
    Firstborns bask in their parents' presence, which may explain why they sometimes act like mini-adults. Firstborns are diligent and want to be the best at everything they do. They excel at winning the hearts of their elders.
    Middle Child

    Middle Child

    "The middle child often feels left out and a sense of, 'Well, I'm not the oldest. I'm not the youngest. Who am I?'" says therapist Meri Wallace. This sort of hierarchical floundering leads middle children to make their mark among their peers, since parental attention is usually devoted to the beloved firstborn or baby of the family.

    In general, middle children tend to possess the following characteristics:

    People-pleasers
    Somewhat rebellious
    Thrives on friendships
    Has large social circle
    Peacemaker
    Last Born

    Last Born

    Youngest children tend to be the most free-spirited due to their parents' increasingly laissez-faire attitude towards parenting the second (or third, or fourth, or fifth...) time around. The baby of the family tends to be:

    Fun-loving
    Uncomplicated
    Manipulative
    Outgoing
    Attention-seeker
    Self-centered
    Only Children

    Only Children

    Being the only child is a unique position in a family. Without any siblings to compete with, the only child monopolizes his parents' attention and resources, not just for a short period of time like a firstborn, but forever. In effect, this makes an only child something like a "super-firstborn": only children have the privilege (and the burden) of having all their parents' support and expectations on their shoulders. Thus, only children tend to be:

    Mature for their age
    Perfectionists
    Conscientious
    Diligent
    Leaders
    There are further exceptions spoke about in the article, If people want to read further here you go.

    Birth Order and Personality: How Siblings Influence Who We Are

    So what do you all think?

  2. #2
    Junior Member jamain's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Frosty View Post

    So what do you all think?
    Firstborn

    As the leader of the pack, firstborns often tend to be:

    Reliable
    Conscientious
    Structured
    Cautious
    Controlling
    Achievers
    Firstborns bask in their parents' presence, which may explain why they sometimes act like mini-adults. Firstborns are diligent and want to be the best at everything they do. They excel at winning the hearts of their elders.
    I am the oldest of 5 kids. Much (but not all) of the description for the first born is true of me. Although I often thought these things were true due to the fact that all 5 of us were born in less than 7 years and I had to grow up and be responsible rather quickly. Due to necessity I was forced into a caregiver role at a very young age. My mom was hard on me because in her words, "she wanted me to be perfect." She failed, but to this day I have a tendency to beat myself up endlessly for mistakes.

    The bold part is not true of me. I had a somewhat combative relationship with my parents as I was growing up and would not say that I basked in their presence. I could be quite mouthy and argumentative at times. My parents often said things that were not logical and did not make sense to me. Unfortunately for me, I had a tendency to point out contradictions and since I was not the most diplomatic in my approach it usually did not go well for me. I was stubborn and even though I knew there would be consequences I often failed to back down. My mouth is usually what got me into trouble. My mom use to tell me that I had two ears and one mouth for a reason. My middle sister on the other hand almost never got in trouble because she was good at telling my parents (especially my dad) what they wanted to hear. The description for middle child does not fit her well at all.

    My respect was not easily earned and there were very few adults (elders) in my life that I truly respected. I didn't put a whole lot of effort into winning the hearts of elders.

  3. #3
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    I'm an only child. I often feel that only children are stereotyped too much, so I'm resistent to say that this impacts my personality, but looking at the list:

    Mature for their age
    Perfectionists
    Conscientious
    Diligent
    Leaders

    The only thing that might not be true is the leader role. People don't seem to generally want me in leadership positions, and I'm often content with not being in one. But it can be frustrating when I do want to be a leader

  4. #4
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Default

    I'm the youngest and 2nd born and I relate to the middle child one but not the youngest one and certaintly not the oldest.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

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    Might as well Dive... Gentleman Jack's Avatar
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    Time-OverLord Norexan's Avatar
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    Firstborn

    As the leader of the pack, firstborns often tend to be:

    Reliable
    Conscientious
    Structured
    Cautious
    Controlling
    Achievers
    Firstborns bask in their parents' presence, which may explain why they sometimes act like mini-adults. Firstborns are diligent and want to be the best at everything they do. They excel at winning the hearts of their elders.
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    ― Friedrich Nietzsche

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    Epic Loser Sanjuro's Avatar
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    It's true of me and my younger sister.

    To me it's common sense how this can happen--I was, for 9 years, an only child, and ultimately the elder. I had all these ridiculous expectations and rules--until I finally left home--and I wound up getting in trouble for things that my parents wouldn't have thought twice about with my little sister. My parents had more severe reactions to things with me--so I was the one who always got grounded, who had to write letter of apology, or what not. My sister...she never did anything wrong as a kid, but I have the distinct sense that she would have gotten a free pass if she had. As a teen, she used to shoplift and smoke, and my mom's just like, Oh that's normal, teens do that at that age. She didn't even give her a talking to! Yet I know if that had been me, they would have slammed me in a mental institution and had me declared incorrigible.

    Ugh, I just made myself angry. I was never allowed to have a life, and hers was handed to her on a gilded platter. I fucking resent my parents for this, I resent my sister for it. They've cut me out of their lives now, so I guess I can try to pretend none of this ugly clusterfuck never happened, idk. Anyway, it's completely reversed. My sister is now the high achiever and conscientious one, and I'm the free-spirited slacker going nowhere in life.

    Anyway. Yes, it wouldn't surprise me if this were a common story. You can't simply be strict and have high expectations of someone and expect that not to shape them, at least within the family unit. Likewise you can't simply give someone a free pass and expect that not to influence them either. And when you put them next to each other, you can expect resentments not to arise.
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    Typology Pupil Introspector's Avatar
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    I'm the oldest and I do relate to that a lot.
    "We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them."
    ~Albert Einstein

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  9. #9
    Where is your god now? Stigmata's Avatar
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    I relate to some of the points of the first born. My sister is five years younger than I, and we're just complete polar opposites in terms maturity and responsibility. My parents were much more disciplined and and stern with me than the ever were with her, yet I always attributed this to being male and thus structuring my rearing to condition me based upon the societal expectations associated typically associated with masculinity. Because of that, out of the two of us, I've always been the much more independent and responsible of the two of us, whereas she still comes across very carefree and needing my parent's guidance than I ever did, even at that same age.

    After I turned 18, it was like my parents just flipped off the authoritarian switch and laid the world in my lap, for me to succeed or fail based on my own abilities, whereas with her, they still interact with her as if she's a teenager, even well into her twenties.

    When I was younger, It made me feel as responsibility and accountability was a burden somehow imposed on me from the order of my birth -- Being the elder of the two, I was always responsible for her and her well-being while my parents were working or away. In hindsight, I now see as an experience from which to draw a sense of strong independence.
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  10. #10
    A Gentle Whisper ~MS*ANGEL~'s Avatar
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    "Firstborn" (does that count for triplets?), but I feel more like a middle child. My parents definitely had high expectations from me, but I'd say my brother (middle) is the real firstborn.

    My sister (last) definitely fits the last-born description. To a T.
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