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Acceptance: Do you accept life's adversities, are you a fighter, pick + choose battle

LightSun

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Quote:
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathways to peace; Taking, as he did, this sinful world; As it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that he will make things right; If I surrender to his will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life; And supremely happy with him Forever in the next Amen” Rienhold Niebuhr
 

Red Memories

Haunted Echoes
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I tend to confront adversity,
 

Frosty

Poking the poodle
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External things I accept- I try to work and get the best of them- but if something is externally beating down on me... I internally try to fight it. As long as I have a will to fight things inside me I feel like nothing outside can really beat me down.
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
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On some level I always hope there is a way to outsmart adversity. I can't live with an ongoing fight, so I choose my battles, but fight hard once a battle is chosen. I also use avoidance, which I realize has a generally negative connotation, but I find it can be positive unless it merely delays the inevitable. My approach is to make a change when a situation feels destructive, and then to keep making changes until something better is found. I have learned that the vast majority of situations do have the same problems, but there are rare instances that are better, so I keep hopping along until I find the better scenario. There is often a price to pay, but sometimes it is worth it. The price usually has to do with ending up with less money. Letting go of money has a lot to do with letting go of heartache, at least for my life it keeps turning out that way.
 

ceecee

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I do accept the things I can't change but that's assuming that I can't change them. To me that's different than asking myself - is this a hill I want to die on? Being a parent has a way of asking that question and making the answers much clearer, strangely enough. But I don't fight internally at all or with myself. That's not productive and solves nothing.

The rest is a religious quote that I don't subscribe to and I don't believe religion is a requirement to peace, with yourself, with neighbors or nations.
 

Atomic Fiend

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All of these options have consequences, sometimes fighting all the time backfires on you. Because sometimes, get this... you fucking fail. because the fight you were in wasn't one you had any control over whatsoever, and by fighting you've just made things worse. However never attempting to exert some control over your life is not only to sacrifice autonomy and the freedom to do so you were granted, but also generally a sign of poor character. To me there is only one way to live and that's to identify the issue before you, and if you can do something...do it. If you can't then it's something you need to nut up and accept.
 

Qlip

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It can look like I'm a fighter that picks and chooses their battles, but I don't think of it so much as fighting anymore as persisting. I just have a set of behaviors and preferences, and I move forward in life with them. If I can't, the whole living thing isn't really worth it. There's no end-game for me, nothing to win.
 
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If we could see the true vastness of the universe, and the terrifyingly destructive forces that fill it in a glance, we'd realize 99% of life is acceptance, or denial. Most of your choice is in what you call it.
IMG_2415.jpg
 

á´…eparted

passages
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I am incredibly stubborn, and will kick and scream against things I can't change in the hope that I can still somehow put a dent in it. Eventually though I end up relenting, but I will remain resentful. If I have the option later to go back and metaphorically kick it, I will. It's really difficult for me to accept bad things I can do nothing about.

In otherwords, I am a fighter. I know how to choose my battles. That is very easy to figure out. I' super stubborn though, so I frequently fight ones I shouldn't sort of out of spite. I often need to be told to stop by others because it's unproductive.
 

Yuurei

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I relish them.

As a kid, I faced a lot of adversity, tbh, the kind that most never have to experience. It was hard but now life is so much easier-and I hate it. With nothing to for ir against life is so mundane and meaningless. I'm constantly bored and restless.
 

magpie

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Sometimes what you have to accept is that you must fight.
 

thepink-cloakedninja

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It depends. My default move is to fight, but I'm learning to let go of what's not my responsibility (I have a strong urge to fight others' battles for them, but instead try to just stand beside them as they save themselves). I can't yet accept many things I'm not capable of changing, but am learning to not become depressed over them.

If, however, it's something in my own life that's my responsibility to deal with, I'll fight 100% no question.
 

Dreamer

Potential is My Addiction
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It may be hard to comprehend, and heck, I find it hard to explain as well, but I'll try to explain this perspective I hold. I live with the understanding that things tend to happen for a reason, almost as if there is a sort of path everyone is meant to take in life, and there are hints for you to find if you know what to look for, but for the most part, you don't, and in the moment, life doesn't really always make all that much sense, but it's when you look back, at the moments that have already passed, that you can see how everything ultimately is linked and you realize that where you are now, is perhaps, what is meant to be. Not that where you are now, is where you want to be in life, but that for a reason that's not always clear, it's a place you are supposed to be. Maybe the struggle you are currently facing is something that will help to build character and you will find that struggle as a positive, turning moment in your life. Maybe the struggle will be that final step that helps you to realize that change is needed.

WITH that understanding, that life is this hidden mystery that leads us through various experiences and moments, I also hold the understanding that life is only what you make of it, meaning, anything you want, you must work for, and nothing will just fall into your lap or handed to you.

Looking at these two views, you can easily say that well, you work hard, then sure, it's logical that you should find yourself in a position that you feel you should be, like viewpoint B comes before viewpoint A, but, this is where things get weird for me to try and explain, I don't see it that way, but rather, as two coexisting and parallel viewpoints that do not depend on the other to exist. They just do, seamlessly. I sort of feel that is one facet of life that is beyond man to understand in a way, I don't really know if these viewpoints I hold should logically coexist without the dependence on the other, but they do, for me. I visualize them as interweaving, while maintaining their consistency and essence.
 

Virtual ghost

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The only thing that can't be changed are laws of physics. Pretty much everything else is "negotionable".
 

Ursa

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There is no point in fighting a battle you cannot win. Having tried that many, many, many times in my life, the end result is always lasting resentment, fantasies of revenge, intense fury and lack of progress.

Rather than waste energy on multiple battles, some of which can't be won, I pick my battles. I can now put forth 110% effort on advantageous battles.

I have to say I don't get how being a parent has anything to do with clarity. "Is this a hill I have die on?" is a question anyone with literally anything to lose is likely to ask. Some people have children, others have promotions at risk, others have sports events, etc. There are just some things that aren't worth fighting because they put what you care about at risk. When I was younger, I fought against a foul call, and I was benched for the rest of the game as a result. Some things just aren't worth it; if you swallow minor bullshit you can live to fight against major bullshit another day.
 

Lark

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The only thing that can't be changed are laws of physics. Pretty much everything else is "negotionable".

I dont think things are as fluid as that, I think they can seem that way and a lot of people wish they where that way but eventually deviate for long enough and far enough from intrinsic patterns and something gives, its basically why psycho-somatic illness and the mind-body relationship is a thing at all.

A dog born in a stable isnt a horse.
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
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I dont think things are as fluid as that, I think they can seem that way and a lot of people wish they where that way but eventually deviate for long enough and far enough from intrinsic patterns and something gives, its basically why psycho-somatic illness and the mind-body relationship is a thing at all.

A dog born in a stable isnt a horse.


I said they are negotionable, but that doesn't says anything about should they be negotionable always.


Btw. "dog is a dog and horse is a horse" is the consequence of laws of physics. (DNA, Proteins, gravity .... etc)
 
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