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Attraction: Male & Female (Not Only Sexual)

Obfuscate

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What are you attracted to?

intelligence, kindness, competency, extremes of fortitude/weakness, honesty, altruism, anti-authoritarian attitude, extremes of introversion/extroversion, critical thinking, troubled pasts, extremes of modesty/immodesty, extremes of naivety/cynicism, articulate expression, and extremes of submissive/dominant demeanor (though i should note that extremely dominant behavior in a partner spells a doomed relationship)...

i am repelled by:

vanity, overly expressed pride, aggression, cruelty, nagging, dedication to rules/schedules/planning, manipulation (of myself or others), an inability to listen, bossiness, and emotional/sexual/monetary predation...

What in girls or guys?

more or less the same thing...

For purposes of friendship AND romantic pursuit?

more or less the same thing, though when romantic interest is involved i become simultaneously more and less picky... i should explain that... when i am considering someone as a mate (before emotion is involved) i am much more picky... if emotion is already at play, i become much more accommodating... well, now that i explained my reasoning i can see that it applies to friends also, but not in as pronounced a way as it does with a romantic interest/partner...

Does what you have historically been attracted to usually lead to success in friendships and:kissya:?

when i first saw that emoticon it looked "inappropriate"... all i saw at first was vigorous motion of one smilie behind another...

i haven't had many failures in friendship (so yes there)... with romantic interests, my tendency to overlook things i don't want to see has always lead to trouble... i always think to myself "but they are so great in nearly every other way... surely i am not perfect, so i guess i really should make allowances for this discrepancy... perhaps if i was more of a catch i could be more picky, but i am only getting older... i can only imagine what my options will look like in ten years after all of the "good ones" have been snatched up... besides, maybe i will be a good influence on them! yeah, that's it, i will just lead by example..."

Physical characteristics? Sure.

in friends? i am not sure if it is a preference, but i have found that most of my male friends are rather large/intimidating fellows or guys who are into martial arts (at least three quarters of them)... i am more or less convinced that many of my male friends became friends with me because they thought i was decent and needed someone to look out for me... i am not sure of that, but it would explain the pattern... which in a way i think is funny, because i don't think of myself as incompetent in that department, and anyone i have been pissed at hasn't either... anyhow, the women don't seem to notice what the men see (i am often told i make them feel safe)... i have also noticed that the majority of my female friends are physically attractive (at least three fifths of them)... i think this might be because i come across as someone who isn't out to "pounce on them"...

i really don't seek people out based upon physical attributes, so i just have to assume that something about me attracts these kinds of people... perhaps it's just a perk of being a well meaning introvert...

i could tell you about what find visually appealing in women, but the internet is full of that allready... it should suffice to say, that while there are some general things i find "the most attractive" i often find that people with differing qualities can be as (or more attractive) than those that do... this is do in part to having broad tastes and in part dues to mental qualities... even the most attractive person can become repulsive if their mind is...

Other? Yes please!

nope, too bad *sticks out tongue*... normally i might, but i would much rather be obstinate today (and there is nothing you can do about it, neener neener)...

well actually that was a fun way of avoiding the phrase "i can't think of anything else relevant to add"... but then i Did think of something else relevant... anyhow, my refusal was fun so it can stay...

ANYhowww... it is worth noting that i have had friendships that didn't fit into my preferences that were really great... i think that just being with someone long enough in the proper circumstances can forge a bond that might otherwise appear distasteful... it is also worth noting that i am (often, though perhaps not always) open to damn near anyone who wants to seek friendship with me... it may take me longer to reciprocate feelings, but if someone really finds me to be so interesting i feel like i should give them a shot... to do otherwise would be more or less saying "i am to good for you" or "you aren't worth my time"... anyhow, i don't want to be the sort of person that rejects people prior to investigation (which is good because that would be unnatural for me)...
 

entropie

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What are you attracted to ?

intelligence - uncheck
kindness - uncheck
competency - uncheck
extremes of fortitude/weakness - do not understand
honesty - not able to answer
altruism - yeees read that word once somewhere
anti-authoritarian attitude - fuck Trump !
extremes of introversion/extroversion - what about soccerism?
critical thinking - something to hide?
troubled pasts - I am out
extremes of modesty/immodesty - extremes of beer I have
extremes of innocence/cynicism - how can one be extreme of innocence?
and articulate expression - ohwhoahwhoah

i am repelled by:

vanity - dont know what this means
overly expressed pride - hahahahahaha me not
aggression - no problem I am more of a sniper
cruelty - dont talk to my liver
nagging - dont know what this means
dedication to rules/schedules/planning - you have people you make rules for !
manipulation (of myself or others) - hihi
an inability to listen - what?
bossiness - business, no problemo
emotional/sexual/monetary predation... - sexual I got !
 

Obfuscate

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intelligence - uncheck
kindness - uncheck
competency - uncheck
extremes of fortitude/weakness - do not understand
honesty - not able to answer
altruism - yeees read that word once somewhere
anti-authoritarian attitude - fuck Trump !
extremes of introversion/extroversion - what about soccerism?
critical thinking - something to hide?
troubled pasts - I am out
extremes of modesty/immodesty - extremes of beer I have
extremes of innocence/cynicism - how can one be extreme of innocence?
and articulate expression - ohwhoahwhoah

i am repelled by:

vanity - dont know what this means
overly expressed pride - hahahahahaha me not
aggression - no problem I am more of a sniper
cruelty - dont talk to my liver
nagging - dont know what this means
dedication to rules/schedules/planning - you have people you make rules for !
manipulation (of myself or others) - hihi
an inability to listen - what?
bossiness - business, no problemo
emotional/sexual/monetary predation... - sexual I got !

Down with soccerism | Life | Sport | spiked

i do not make rules for people, outside of what i will tolerate in regards to verbal and physical attention towards myself... this was merely a reply to a request for preferences... the word preference is not synonymous with prerequisite...

perhaps i should have used the word naivety instead of innocence... it is closer to what i had intended... thanks for pointing that out *edits that*...

did you just call yourself a sexual predator? *LAUGHS*... are you sure you know what that implies?
 

entropie

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Down with soccerism | Life | Sport | spiked

i do not make rules for people, outside of what i will tolerate in regards to verbal and physical attention towards myself... this was merely a reply to a request for preferences... the word preference is not synonymous with prerequisite...

perhaps i should have used the word naivety instead of innocence... it is closer to what i had intended... thanks for pointing that out *edits that*...

did you just call yourself a sexual predator? *LAUGHS*... are you sure you know what that implies?

no !

tell me :)
 

Obfuscate

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no !

tell me :)

this is from a wikipedia article

"A sexual predator is a person seen as obtaining or trying to obtain sexual contact with another person in a metaphorically 'predatory' or abusive manner. Analogous to how a predator hunts down its prey, so the sexual predator is thought to 'hunt' for his or her sex partners. People who commit sex crimes, such as rape or child sexual abuse, are commonly referred to as sexual predators, particularly in tabloid media or as a power phrase by politicians."
 

entropie

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this is from a wikipedia article

"A sexual predator is a person seen as obtaining or trying to obtain sexual contact with another person in a metaphorically 'predatory' or abusive manner. Analogous to how a predator hunts down its prey, so the sexual predator is thought to 'hunt' for his or her sex partners. People who commit sex crimes, such as rape or child sexual abuse, are commonly referred to as sexual predators, particularly in tabloid media or as a power phrase by politicians."

oh thats cowardly :), waving with opinions and then quoting wikipedia...
 

Obfuscate

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oh thats cowardly :), waving with opinions and then quoting wikipedia...

i am not trying to be dismissive... i am asking if you meant to use the phrase in that way... in other words, i don't think you were intentionally saying that you are a rapist... i chose to assume that this was a (hilarious) failure in communication due to a language barrier...

if you indeed meant to say you were a rapist, it isn't funny to me anymore, but i chose to think more of you than that...
 

entropie

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i am not trying to be dismissive... i am asking if you meant to use the phrase in that way... in other words, i don't think you were intentionally saying that you are a rapist... i chose to assume that this was a (hilarious) failure in communication due to a language barrier...

if you indeed meant to say you were a rapist, it isn't funny to me anymore, but i chose to think more of you than that...

And now comes the moral blockade....
 

Obfuscate

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And now comes the moral blockade....

moral blockade? fucking entp's... i love your variety of bullshit...

unless you follow this up with claiming to be a "misunderstood" rapist, i think you are just pulling my leg... even if you do follow up with that claim i will still think you are pulling my leg (though part of me will question it)... you are very funny...
 

entropie

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moral blockade? fucking entp's... i love your variety of bullshit...

unless you follow this up with claiming to be a "misunderstood" rapist, i think you are just pulling my leg... even if you do follow up with that claim i will still think you are pulling my leg (though part of me will question it)... you are very funny...

I wont be able to fulfill your wish for a rapist but I like you. Pretty debative for an intp, sure thats right ? :D
 

Obfuscate

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I wont be able to fulfill your wish for a rapist but I like you. Pretty debative for an intp, sure thats right ? :D

intp's love debate... i debate with my entp brother all of the time, that is when i saw the phrase "moral blockade" i immediately checked to see if you were an entp...

my wish for a rapist? hah hah hah... feel free to drop in on any of my posts like this, you crack me up...
 

entropie

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intp's love debate... i debate with my entp brother all of the time, that is when i saw the phrase "moral blockade" i immediately checked to see if you were an entp...

my wish for a rapist? hah hah hah... feel free to drop in on any of my posts like this, you crack me up...

really? And I thought intps are uncrackable. :)
 

Galaxy Gazer

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For friendships with girls
-charisma
-supportive/loyal nature
-active/social lifestyle
-free-spirited (not uptight)
-not strongly opinionated (not for any misogynistic reason, but because I tend to freely speak my mind, and this can lead to awkward moments if the person I'm talking to strongly disagrees with me)

I tend to be most attracted, friendship-wise, to ESFJ, ENFP, ESFP, and ISFJ girls.

For friendships with guys
-This doesn't really happen. If anything, maybe similar interests?

For sexual/romantic relationships with girls
(I've never had any sort of relationship with a girl, so these are just guesses)
-sweetness/cuteness of personality
-moderately curvaceous body type (not as in boobs/ass, but as in overall softness and thickness)
-ability to engage in the occasional deep conversation
-again, not uptight

I tend to be most attracted to INFP girls who are into anime and similar things.

For sexual/romantic relationships with guys
-charisma (good looks, social skills, persuasiveness, ability to be entertaining)
-sense of humor (I prefer for it to be on the dark/morbid side like mine, but not to the point of being blatantly insensitive)
-similar views (because it's going to come up at some point)
-healthy lifestyle (I don't think I could date a drug user, for example)
-seductiveness
-as far as appearance: medium/long hair, dark/goth/biker-ish clothing style, possibly facial hair, and an overall look that says "I just walked out of the seventh circle of hell" but also "I want to make you feel good."

Types of guys I can see myself dating: ENTP, ENFP, ISFP, ESTP
 

solpi

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Romantic Attraction: Girls
- gentle
- understanding or at least tries to understand
- open
- non-judgemental
- encouraging
- stable

Friendship -- girls:
- laid back
- talkative
- low maintenance
- not lazy

Friendship -- guys
- sense of humor
- actually listens

I tend to stray away from J types, but nothing I can't tolerate. My close friends and family members mostly consist of J types though.
I can really admire an INFP or an ESTP, but I can never find myself to be compatible with them.
 

Methylene

Now with more salt.
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My friends have almost all been INFPs, followed by an ENFP, another INTP, and an ESFJ. All males. So, for being friends with me, Ne seems to be mandatory along with some F to help me come out. I know that I've probably idealized that, but I think that I'm overrall more attracted by INFPs. One of the best relationships I've ever had was with an INFP. We were both too shy to express what we were feeling, but what we managed to build during those months was really intense.
I have to say that instead I'm ending up engaged to sensors (I got two ISFPs out of two boyfriends) with the result that we don't speak the same language and thus there are problems in communication. But I feel really attracted by Fi's modesty and ability with the feelings.
 

Cloudpatrol

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My friends have almost all been INFPs, followed by an ENFP, another INTP, and an ESFJ. All males. So, for being friends with me, Ne seems to be mandatory along with some F to help me come out. I know that I've probably idealized that, but I think that I'm overrall more attracted by INFPs. One of the best relationships I've ever had was with an INFP. We were both too shy to express what we were feeling, but what we managed to build during those months was really intense.
I have to say that instead I'm ending up engaged to sensors (I got two ISFPs out of two boyfriends) with the result that we don't speak the same language and thus there are problems in communication. But I feel really attracted by Fi's modesty and ability with the feelings.

I LOVE your avatar. It makes me giggle. Does your name mean anything? I searched it but couldn't find a definition?

I get along well with INTP's so hear what you are saying :)

Romantic Attraction: Girls
- gentle
- understanding or at least tries to understand
- open
- non-judgemental
- encouraging
- stable

Friendship -- girls:
- laid back
- talkative
- low maintenance
- not lazy

Friendship -- guys
- sense of humor
- actually listens

I tend to stray away from J types, but nothing I can't tolerate. My close friends and family members mostly consist of J types though.
I can really admire an INFP or an ESTP, but I can never find myself to be compatible with them.


Hi!

May I ask what about INFP's or ESTP's is off-putting as far as incompatibility? And, welcome btw, I don't think I've had the opportunity to speak with you before this.
 

Methylene

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[MENTION=27162]Cloudpatrol[/MENTION]
Yeah, but the meaning of my name is simple.
Apathy (coming from a/ negative +pathos) + lex, (law in latin).
I mixed them up without looking too much at the morphology. And thus, from Apathy and Lex I made is as the only possible law for me was the apathy. Which is of course not true because I'm reeeeeeeeeeally emotional under the surface. But whatever.
That avatar is beautiful. I've officially renamed it " the hen sailing the seven seas inside a bucket".

I'm a cat kind of person, too, so I can understand your avatar. (It's even one of my basic jokes after a breakup "who's going to give me the first cat? I'll die covered in cats!
 

Cloudpatrol

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[MENTION=29978]apathylex[/MENTION] Nice! "The Law of Apathy" is a perfect mandate for an emotional figure (laughs).

Your avatar makes me think of the Muppets for some reason or something in the vein of humour a la "Austenland".

Yes, I understand your joke. I have a strict 'one cat only' rule for myself. A sort of 'know your limit, stay within it' motto. If I ever had the resources, I would love to have a sanctuary where I could rescue animals with adequate ventilation, food... I am an animal lover and love the accoutrements...but I also love homes where you can't actually smell that animals live there (grin).
 

Falcarius

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COOL
Friendship

Dinosaurs people who are confidant, non-judgmental, positive, and encourage other to be better dinosaurs people . Most of Falcarius' closest friends tend to be older dinosaurs people as he values their knowledge and life-experience. He seem to have more female friends than male friends for some reason.:unsure:

Relationships

Falcarius once told a psychologist that because of having 3 of his 2 closest female relatives with serious mental illnesses that he has a phobia of any future sexual partner going batshit crazy. He told the psychologist he just wanted to be with someone who is stern and rigid who could do boring things like drink cups of green tea with while discussing current affairs. The truth is probably that is probably the opposite to what Falcarius really wants as what he really wants is someone who is easy going, excitable, spontaneous, and encourages Falcarius to try new things. More than anything Falcarius likes confidence.

Falcarius could also tell you all how he imagines his ideal partner as a xSxP curvy brunette and gives bonus points if they have curly hair. But the truth be told most of his girlfriends have been stick thin blonds; the kind that leaves one the fear if they are going to have a curious case of popping them like a balloon. They are normally ESxP or INFP.
 

Litsnob

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Jan 22, 2016
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I definitely don't consider what I think a person's MBTI type is but I am fairly consistent in what I am attracted to. I tend to like people in the ambivert range leaning introverted. I like intelligence, wit and people who smile a lot but have a balance of seriousness and silliness. Usually I like silliness in private, in-jokes. I will be more attracted to people with whom I have interests in common.

I am not attracted to what I perceive to be shallowness, fakeness, showing off, very extroverted with high need for large groups, arrogance, religious beliefs, racism/sexism, general bigotry, flakiness, immaturity, crassness, or ignorance.

In a romantic relationship I want loyalty, understanding and support. I probably want that in any close platonic relationship too.
 
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