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    Senior Member ThaumaturgicTheorist's Avatar
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    Default What constitutes whining?

    I don't know what's going on but for some reason I keep running into the words "whiny" and "whining"...to the point where they're starting to not even seem meaningful anymore. Any expression of discontent is whining. Anyone going through any problem at all, however legitimate or possibly pathological, is whining and everything can be solved if they just "grow up". I'm starting to get the impression that these words are just a shorthand for "I don't want to listen to this/I don't care" or, most likely, "I don't understand your problem". Rather than any relevant assessment of the person's character or issue.

    So to test this, what do you label as whining?
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    Damn American Cowboy Reborn Relic's Avatar
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    There's a subtext that either the thing being whined about either shouldn't evoke complaining or shouldn't evoke that much complaining, but you've basically hit the nail on the head. Where exactly the line is drawn between complaining too much and not is kind of a matter of personal taste.

    I label whining declaring things broken when they're still perfectly usable, mostly. Or situations when my brother starts trying to police what I eat or do because "You never do that!". I have a few "taboos" myself, but...not that many. Jebus.

    Ooooh! Another big one--when someone else gets something and the person who doesn't get it complains about them having it, while perhaps ignoring that there are legitimate reasons for one to have it and the other not to.
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    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThaumaturgicTheorist View Post
    I don't know what's going on but for some reason I keep running into the words "whiny" and "whining"...to the point where they're starting to not even seem meaningful anymore. Any expression of discontent is whining. Anyone going through any problem at all, however legitimate or possibly pathological, is whining and everything can be solved if they just "grow up". I'm starting to get the impression that these words are just a shorthand for "I don't want to listen to this/I don't care" or, most likely, "I don't understand your problem". Rather than any relevant assessment of the person's character or issue.

    So to test this, what do you label as whining?
    Mostly it means - I don't want to hear this anymore because I likely have heard it, repeatedly and nothing has been done about it. Especially if solutions have been offered and the whiner could give a shit yet still complains that others don't understand.
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    this: Vocaroo | Voice message

    at least i'd get told to stop whining when i did that as a little kid and i usually did that when i was very cranky and done with whatever i was doing but being made to keep at it.

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    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    It is complaining, especially repetitive/protracted complaining, where the focus is on wallowing in self-pity and one's feeling of misery rather than on finding a solution.

    Also this:
    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    Mostly it means - I don't want to hear this anymore because I likely have heard it, repeatedly and nothing has been done about it. Especially if solutions have been offered and the whiner could give a shit yet still complains that others don't understand.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...
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    #KUWK Kierva's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    Mostly it means - I don't want to hear this anymore because I likely have heard it, repeatedly and nothing has been done about it. Especially if solutions have been offered and the whiner could give a shit yet still complains that others don't understand.
    Finally! Someone knows where I'm coming from.
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    Senior Member Generalist's Avatar
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    Obviously complaining/venting has some potent therapeutic effects and damn it, it can just feel good. But I would classify whining as repeatedly complaining about something trivial or when people throw themselves a pity party, consistently. Also when a toddler cries because she can't have another cookie.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    It is complaining, especially repetitive/protracted complaining, where the focus is on wallowing in self-pity and one's feeling of misery rather than on finding a solution.

    Also this:
    Seconded.

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    Earth Exalted Thursday's Avatar
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    When a person concentrates on the problem, the negative, and how each has and will be detrimental to them, while ignoring one's responsibility and contribution to said problem. The victim mentality made verbal.
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