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Your experiences with mental illness

fetus

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Hey guys. So I was wondering--do any of you live with a mental illness? I'm really passionate about eliminating mental health stigma, and I think it's good to be able to talk openly about these sorts of things. One in four Americans deals with a mental illness, you know--but it's still easy to feel alone. These illnesses are just as real and serious as diabetes or asthma.
I have bipolar disorder and GAD, and am currently being treated with medications and therapy.

What are your experiences?
 

PerfectlyConfused

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Well after failing 4/5 years of intense personal growth study and application failure, I ended up with ADHD diagnosis.
I was also given a suprise ASD (which i'm still 2 minds about, 3 years ago)

Then there's:

CPTSD
OCD + OCD-O + Several Phobias and even Somaotype (sp) OCD anxiety, but i've pretty much fixed that one now.
GAD, SocialAD, SeasonAD
Borderlined PPD (Psychiatrist mentioned for me to look up last time I saw, I already knew though)
Several narcissistic traits late teens/early 20s, but i've dealt with them mostly now. (now i've just got to deal with my GF Narc traits, lol)
Probable BDD

I wasn't sure about Bi-Polar, never really caught my attention tbh. I did watch that documentary with Stephen Fry about Bi-Polar, and can say, I might have dysrythymia(sp- and can't find it, it's like a lighter up and down depression though) as well, but probably not Bi-Polar. Although with my outbursts, and "Jekyll and Hyde" moments when I was younger, and my ADHD up and down moods, I do sometimes wonder.

I actually felt like I had became BPD for a while, after my T dropped from 80%~ to 1% (INFJ relationship) AND my previous Psychiatrist being hugely incompetent, nearly forcing me to suicide, and so much more I can't really go into now.

There's a stigma in the UK as well, but I don't think pill popping is as bad here as it is in the states.

I don't mind sharing all the above, because it's not something to be ashamed of. Besides that, most mental health issues have positive side affects as well. As tough as it's been for me, I would never want to be a Neurotypical.

Only medication i'm on/stopped now was for ADHD. (stimulants). They're paranoid to prescribe much in the UK.
I'm not a fan of medication in general though, not even Anti-biotics, which as I understand it, is a CPTSD thing.
 

á´…eparted

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I have two:

Bipolar II
Asperger's Syndrome

I didn't know I was bipolar until last spring. It made a lot of sense when I learned it, and explained a lot about my nature. Since learning about it, I tried taking a medication that I thought was working, until I had a very very nasty breakdown in early winter that made it clear it wasn't doing its job. With that, and since it's hard on your liver (valproic acid) I took myself off it. I've been managing it well as I have been keeping a very keen eye on stress triggers that set me off, and my research adviser has been very accommodating for me in this regard (since grad school is inherently very stressful). I have enough self-awareness to more or less keep myself in check, but once I finish up a few things in my life that need direct attention, I'll put more concerted effort into managing/solving it.

Asperger's is not much of a problem for me. It's extremely well managed, and most people don't know I have it unless I point it out and they have been around me for an extended period of time and gotten to know me. I'm extroverted and like people. While those two factors are often not associated with asperger's and autism, they are independent variables that can show up together. Because of this, and my desire to do things right, I put a ton of focused effort into "learning" people in my teen years, and it figure out how to correctly socialize. The result is that I am somewhat odd, but well liked and people usually can't tell outside of some quirks that anyone could potentially have. The area where it persists is how I feel emotions, in particular raw basic emotions (fear, happiness, sadness, stress). It's linked closely with physical feelings and is frequently disconnected from thought, which can make things very confusing. I hide it from most though.
 

Yama

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OCPD, which well actually I guess is a personality disorder and not a mental disorder since it differs from OCD.
"Mild to severe" depression. Runs in my family, both sides, so it wasn't surprising that it developed in both me and my sister as well. I've been functioning okay with it though. No one I meet (in person at least, probably online as well) would ever guess it unless I mentioned it otherwise because I come off as such a cheerful person. I don't like to bother other people with my problems, so I'm good at hiding it and "shoving it to the side" until I get home and can deal with it privately. Most of the time I'm okay, but when I get overwhelmed with stress or anxiety it can get really out of hand.
 

Kensei

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A mix of Asperger's and AD-HD, I don't see it as a mental illness however. I see it as basically an improvement that makes me special and different from the rest of the world. It helps me to know my strengths, Asperger's being increased Intelligence and tolerance to physicL pain and ADHD makes me better in sports, but less focused in school, but it's cool. At least I can look at a normal person and think, "he may get the girls, but I can easily beat the shit out of him" :)
 

Frosty

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I went to a psychologist when I was really young and they tried to diagnose me with ADHD but my parents didn't want me labeled.
 

hjgbujhghg

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I am diagnosed with panic disorder, which is not fun at all, my panic attacks used to be so strong I struggled with dissociative stages of feeling derealized. I am far better now and I think I kind of found my way out of unpleasant feelings to some point.
What bothers me a bit is my borderline personality diagnosis. My psychiatrist seems to be really sure, that I do have it and it brings me into thinking whether I live in a deep self denial of such thing, or whether he has no idea what is wrong with me... :dry:
 

Hitoshi-San

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As a kid I was diagnosed with GAD and mild OCD, but my mom diagnosed me (by herself of course, and she was clearly wrong) with autism when I was maybe 3-4. You see, I would line my toys up on a table and clench my fists and teeth and rock back and forth while talking about the toys (just something obvious, like "the giraffe is taller than the lion"). I also wouldn't wear certain fabrics which she thought was super weird. I had grown out of the rocking back and forth by the time I was about 7-8 and gradually began wearing the fabrics I wouldn't wear when I was 11-12.

I'd just like to add, the clothes I wore in that "stage" didn't make me stand out a great deal. I guess I just didn't like jeans or socks with sneakers. But girls my age also wore skirts, leggings, flats, and flip-flops so I didn't care too much or feel left out. And in high school I've met lots of girls who refuse to wear jeans, or if they do, complain all day about them, so maybe I was just early ;)

I wouldn't sleep in my own bed and have always been sort of shy, but back in elementary school my parents thought the latter was crippling and ruining my life, but I didn't care because my classmates were nice to me and I had a few close friends (I went to a really small school - my 8th grade graduating class was 35 people including me). My parents set me up with a psychologist and over the course of 5 years, we came to the conclusion that I was just super anxious.

Fast forward to late middle school and early high school I was able to break out of my shell; make lots of new friends and be known as the "funny one" amongst them, be elected as secretary of student council (both of these gave me a TON of self-confidence) and try new hobbies. But I've been thinking lately that I could have ADHD and avoidant personality disorder. I don't want to self-diagnose myself though like my mom did when I was younger :/.
 

Cygnus

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In all seriousness, I'm willing to bet at least half of the population of this forum is autistic in one form or another.
My objective opinion, not intended to be derogatory.
 

á´…eparted

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In all seriousness, I'm willing to bet at least half of the population of this forum is autistic in one form or another.
My objective opinion, not intended to be derogatory.

I wouldn't go that far, but higher than the statistical average for sure.
 

Jet Stream

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I've had an experience with a man with dementia or something of the like. He was threatening his caregivers, cussing me, flailing around violently in his wheelchair. Not cool. Thankfully he was dead of natural causes less than a week later.
 

BadOctopus

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I don't know if this qualifies as mental illness, so much as a phobia, but I have anxiety when it comes to crowds. I'm okay with small to medium groups, but crowds are another story. My heart starts pounding and my throat closes up, and I want to scream/cry/start punching people indiscriminately. Rock concerts are my personal hell, which is unfortunate, because I love listening to live music. Guess I'll have to settle for concert DVDs.

Crowded airplanes really suck, too. And theme parks. God, I wish I could go to a completely empty Six Flags.
 

robowolf

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Social Anxiety Disorder, but it's cool as long as I stay locked in my room alone. I don't struggle that much with physical symptoms (I do, but other people have it a lot worse than I). Anxiety even led me to suicidal ideation but it never gave me nausea, sleep problems or panic attacks. My nervous system is awesome. Makes it harder to diagnose stuff, but easier to live in denial (it also makes me look retarded when I can't make eye contact or speak decently while moving nervously my hands and arms but not showing any other anxiety symptom).

About the stigma, it's a weird matter. Where I live, claiming to have a mental disorder is the new wearing shoes that light up when you walk, and what makes it really funny (and depressing) is that 99% of the people here don't know shit about psychiatry, and a lot of those who do have mental disorders (usually teens, usually mood disorders) and take meds are all like "oooh, look at me, I take meds, omg I'm such a lost cause, omg yeah but look at me and be sympathetic cuz I'm special". So, going back on topic, my experience with mental illness is: I'm surrounded by idiotic hormonal teens with histrionic pd and/or factitious disorder and this brings out my repressed hatred for what causes my anxiety (people) which should stay hidden at least until throwing rocks at people becomes legal.
 

ceecee

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I've had an experience with a man with dementia or something of the like. He was threatening his caregivers, cussing me, flailing around violently in his wheelchair. Not cool. Thankfully he was dead of natural causes less than a week later.

Please stop talking. Just...stop.
 

Redbone

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I've had severe depression. I was actually diagnosed with bipolar disorder but that was an error looking at my normal mode of being contrasting so wildly with depressed self. It was the depression that was the real problem. At one point, I did nothing for a decade except sit in my bedroom. I had ECT treatments as a last resort...it helped but didn't last long. I've been in the hospital for suicide attempts.

Now it's not as bad as it used to be. It's still bad and I still often feel 'attacks' of intense despair but my life is different now that allows me better ways of coping than I had back then. I'm so different from then...I almost find it hard to believe that those things happened. I don't take any medication for it but the medicine I take for migraine prevention seems to help me (yes...I know that points toward bipolar disorder being an accurate dx...I still say no).
 

danseen

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i don't really believe in it. i think it's the most insidious of medical branches, but then they reckon atheism and drinking at university, or taking drugs are "wrong", but meh...
 

fetus

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i don't really believe in it. i think it's the most insidious of medical branches, but then they reckon atheism and drinking at university, or taking drugs are "wrong", but meh...

People who live with a mental illness can attest to the fact that it is very real and often debilitating.
 

Frosty

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Ummm yep still all I have is the old add diagnosis... Oh and there was a note of mild dyslexia apparently with it but I dont think that that really counts as a mental illness. I think that doctors at times can be way too quick to diagnose. Not that mental illness isnt real, but alot of the time it is just someone having a character trait that is heightoned a bit compared to the normal population and doctors wanting to play off of that and claim it as a disease.
 

fetus

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Ummm yep still all I have is the old add diagnosis... Oh and there was a note of mild dyslexia apparently with it but I dont think that that really counts as a mental illness. I think that doctors at times can be way too quick to diagnose. Not that mental illness isnt real, but alot of the time it is just someone having a character trait that is heightoned a bit compared to the normal population and doctors wanting to play off of that and claim it as a disease.

Yes, I would agree with you that sometimes one's personality is diagnosed as a mental illness. There is the problem of overdiagnosis. A mental illness causes clinical distress or impairment in functioning though. If it's not causing impairment then most likely it's not a problem.
I don't think it's that the doctors want to play it off, necessarily. Most doctors really are adhering the Hippocratic oath and want to help their patients--but the mistake of diagnosing someone with an illness they don't have happens. Misdiagnosis, or diagnosing an existing illness as something else, also happens--especially with bipolar; many don't show (hypo)manic symptoms until after their first depression.
 
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