It's fear that underlies it for me. I know where it comes from and it's irrational, so it's more just getting used to the idea that not everyone needs to like me, and then the fear gradually drops.
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07-31-2008, 04:29 PM #11...so much smoke pouring out of each chromosome.
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07-31-2008, 04:30 PM #12`
'Cause you can't handle me...
"A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it." - David Stevens
"That that is, is. That that is not, is not. Is that it? It is."
Veritatem dies aperit
Ride si sapis
Intelligentle sparkles
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07-31-2008, 04:43 PM #13
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07-31-2008, 04:46 PM #14
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07-31-2008, 04:49 PM #15
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07-31-2008, 04:54 PM #16
Need for positive attention, i.e. affirmation and fear of rejection, those are the underlying motives I think, but then again, I am not you.
You would be doing yourself a disservice by attempting to think or believe that you are acting this way for the benefit of your audience.
I, at times, "contort" or compromise myself to make someone else feel good, but that is an entirely different "issue", one that I don't think you are dealing with here, and one that I don't witness you doing, at least here on the boards.`
'Cause you can't handle me...
"A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it." - David Stevens
"That that is, is. That that is not, is not. Is that it? It is."
Veritatem dies aperit
Ride si sapis
Intelligentle sparkles
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07-31-2008, 05:00 PM #17
All I see when I read this is someone who fears themself, their true being and intentions, someone who has an intense fear of being "found out", i.e. "what if the world knew, what if he or she knew, what I *really* thought or felt, how things *really* are?" Perhaps your *nature* is not a light or friendly one, perhaps you have a natural propensity to be mean, and you are hyper-conscious of this fact. Perhaps you are so afraid or ashamed of this fact that you try your hardest to conceal its existence, negate it by acting in opposition to it.
I dunno, just my thoughts.
:/`
'Cause you can't handle me...
"A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it." - David Stevens
"That that is, is. That that is not, is not. Is that it? It is."
Veritatem dies aperit
Ride si sapis
Intelligentle sparkles
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07-31-2008, 05:04 PM #18
Edahn- would you characterize yourself as a child as a "pleaser?" Meaning, did you really do your best to make authority figures proud of you? I did- not because they put undue pressure on me, because they didn't, but because I admired them and wanted them to admire me back.
CC, I don't really think (if it's anything like my problem, at least) that this is about "brown-nosing." I don't see Edahn as a brown-noser, in fact if he senses he needs to be critical to be admired, he'll do that (as will I).The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
-anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii
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07-31-2008, 05:08 PM #19
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07-31-2008, 05:11 PM #20
"To be admired"
Yes, an important point, indeed.`
'Cause you can't handle me...
"A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it." - David Stevens
"That that is, is. That that is not, is not. Is that it? It is."
Veritatem dies aperit
Ride si sapis
Intelligentle sparkles
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