• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

Emotional Blindspots

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,037
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
496
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Are there certain emotions you have trouble experiencing yourself or perceiving in others?

I have been discovering that I tend to be oblivious to anger. Lots of time i miss it when someone is angry - i just think they are anxious, deep in thought, or maybe joking. I don't often feel anger, so i don't expect it in others. This actually gets me into a little bit of trouble occasionally. I've just had people surprise me that they are actually angry, or apologize to me for being angry when i never noticed.

It's a peculiar feeling to come to this realization, and i was just wondering if anyone else ever experiences something like it?
 

alcea rosea

New member
Joined
Nov 11, 2007
Messages
3,658
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
For me it's the negative emotions that I have trouble with, anger and anxiety are the most difficult. Expressing sadness is not a problem for me.
 

spirilis

Senior Membrane
Joined
Jul 5, 2007
Messages
2,687
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Sexual ambition, for lack of a better term. Some friends of mine can spot it in others, I am almost blind as a bat in the presence of it.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I think the depth of anger is a problem for many NFJs. I want to believe that all of my motives are altruistic and that other people are that way too, so I tend to (or used to) tamp down my anger until I exploded. THEN I'd become aware of how angry I was.

I don't acknowledge emotional cruelty either. I tend to sweep it under the rug because I don't want people to think I'm a crybaby.
 

Liason

I'm more offensive in person!
Joined
Jul 8, 2008
Messages
185
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I can perceive what emotions people have and what(when I have one. Often time I simply ignore the person.)my responding emotion is fairly easily. The difficulty I have the most problems with is finding out what emotion they want me to have as a reaction ie the emotion that will solve the dispute so I can get back to whatever the hell I was doing before they interrupted me with their petty opinions and emotions.
 

spirilis

Senior Membrane
Joined
Jul 5, 2007
Messages
2,687
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I don't acknowledge emotional cruelty either. I tend to sweep it under the rug because I don't want people to think I'm a crybaby.

Sometimes cruelty doesn't register on my radar at all, unless it's in a more extreme or obvious manner. Passive aggression often misses the radar (or barely makes a blip) for similar reasons.
The degree of obliviousness for those two depend mostly on how "numb" or stupid I feel at that time.
 

The_Liquid_Laser

Glowy Goopy Goodness
Joined
Jul 11, 2007
Messages
3,376
MBTI Type
ENTP
Are there certain emotions you have trouble experiencing yourself or perceiving in others?

I have been discovering that I tend to be oblivious to anger. Lots of time i miss it when someone is angry - i just think they are anxious, deep in thought, or maybe joking. I don't often feel anger, so i don't expect it in others. This actually gets me into a little bit of trouble occasionally. I've just had people surprise me that they are actually angry, or apologize to me for being angry when i never noticed.

It's a peculiar feeling to come to this realization, and i was just wondering if anyone else ever experiences something like it?

I don't experience most emotions very often. I rarely get angry, sad, or excited. Most of the time I'm just optimistic and moderately happy. I probably come across as fake to a lot of people who can't relate to that.
 

Aerithria

Senior Thread Terminator
Joined
May 18, 2008
Messages
568
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
Sadness for me. I can recognize it somewhat in other people, but in me I wouldn't be able to tell. Either I don't feel it, or it doesn't translate well. Even in a depressive state, I couldn't ever categorize myself as being sad, as I tend to become too emotionally apathetic to recognize that it exists.

Also, even though I do recognize it in other people, I am bad at responding to it. My friends have already learned this and have back-up plans if they actually need to talk about that sort of thing, heh. It sounds terrible, but I honestly have no way of responding without unintentionally making it worse.
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,187
MBTI Type
BELF
Enneagram
594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
My "people radar" had to be so hypersensitive growing up, I think I probably tend to read in too much rather than not notice a particular emotion at all.

I also find that my thinking could ruin my emotion perception: There are lots of things I actually pick up on but when i think about them too much (overanalyze), I confuse myself.

As far as my own emotions, the last few years have been a revelation for me in regards to a few emotions:

- Deep-seated desire (I had trouble knowing what I really wanted)
- Anger (I didn't realize how mad I was over something = hurt over something)
- Disappointment in others or a situation.

All emotions I had learned to ignore/neglect as a child, to survive my life. But you can tear down the blocks and "regain" them, I think.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I'm a disallower of disappointment too.
 

anii

homo-loving sonovagun
Joined
Jul 9, 2007
Messages
901
MBTI Type
infp
Enneagram
9
I sometimes can't tell whether certain types are serious or joking. Usually SJs.

I'm typically blind to the traits in my shadow that I abhor in others: arrogance, cruelty, and greed.

I've recently learned to embrace lust. So that's no longer invisible to me.
 

squibbles

New member
Joined
Jun 23, 2008
Messages
77
MBTI Type
INTJ
Attraction. I CANNOT, for the life of me, tell when a guy is just being friendly, or if he actually is attracted to me. I once went on a date (first one ever, actually) last summer and did not realize that it was a date as opposed to "just hanging out" until about a month or so later. And it was something blatantly date-ish....like, dinner and a movie, and he paid for the movie.

I also can't tell when I'm attracted to others. I'm convinced that we're "just friends," while everyone around me is asking if we're dating, or if we like each other. Then a couple of months later, I'll acknowledge my feelings, still questioning them all the while, though...
 

The_Liquid_Laser

Glowy Goopy Goodness
Joined
Jul 11, 2007
Messages
3,376
MBTI Type
ENTP
I sometimes can't tell whether certain types are serious or joking. Usually SJs.

I don't think they can tell whether they are joking or not either. I know there have to be people out there that enjoy the "Gasoline Alley" comic strips, but I don't know who or why. :huh:
 

millerm277

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2008
Messages
978
MBTI Type
ISTP
Anger....it's an emotion I am pretty much missing, both mentally and expressed. As such, while I recognize it in others, I expect it will go away in a second like it does for me.....that typically isn't the case.
 

JustDave

New member
Joined
Jan 20, 2008
Messages
992
MBTI Type
xNTP
I'll drink to that. As I've been known to say: "my anger is fleeting".
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
That must be interesting. Because my anger holds on like a pitbull with its jaws locked. It takes a while to ramp me up, takes a while to ramp me back down. Luckily, I don't get THAT angry but once in a blue moon when things are absolutely going haywire.

My twin rarely stays mad. That's an upshot of living with an ENFP.
 

entropie

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 24, 2008
Messages
16,767
MBTI Type
entp
Enneagram
783
I have no problems with any emotions at all, just the others. I feel fine :)
(trying to reach my beer with that long grown nose) xD
 

Park

New member
Joined
May 3, 2007
Messages
263
MBTI Type
INTP
Yeah I have a few - jalousy and various kinds of fear.
 

01011010

New member
Joined
Jun 22, 2008
Messages
3,916
MBTI Type
INxJ
I don't always know when someone wants attention, especially in a romantic relationship.
 
Top