Borderline Personality Disorder

[Opal]

Well- it was a complex set of circumstances that took place. I remember one time being very clear about the pain it was causing me. He pretended I was crazy- like did a gaslighting thing on me. Another time- I chose to be very calm and almost apologetic- just in hopes of getting some sort of reaction that I could work with- and I was essentially given the silent treatment. Very crazy reactions that I'm not accustomed to. Honestly- I have been in relationships that had really normal back&forth type of interaction. With Mr. BPD, it almost seems surreal like, "Is he REALLY doing this???" Like I would actually think that this must be a joke because grown people do not behave this strangely- but yes- grown people with personality disorders very much act really crazy. Almost like dealing with a delusional 5 year old.

I know I'm not getting as specific as you might need me to- sorry. I think I was sort of traumatized by the entire experience of our "blow up(s.)"

Oh, don't worry. Do whatever you're comfortable with--like I said, feel no obligation to answer my questions. I'm just trying to get a better sense of your dynamic.

Did the confrontations you mentioned occur in person? And how direct and literal were you when expressing your feelings about his actions?

 

[AzulEyes]

Oh, don't worry. Do whatever you're comfortable with--like I said, feel no obligation to answer my questions. I'm just trying to get a better sense of your dynamic.

Did the confrontations you mentioned occur in person? And how direct and literal were you when expressing your feelings about his actions?

Not in person. VERY direct. Very literal. I have strong Te for an ENFP- and I do not beat around the bush.

 

[Opal]

Not in person. VERY direct. Very literal. I have strong Te for an ENFP- and I do not beat around the bush.

Oh good. I thought perhaps you were vague or allusive, which would make things that much muddier and more painful.

 

[AzulEyes]

Oh good. I thought perhaps you were vague or allusive, which would make things that much muddier and more painful.

No- that is the thing. And dealing with an ENTJ that you would think wants very direct communication. But when you are not emotionally well- direct does not always work. Actually- nothing worked with this person. I have given up.

 

[yeghor]

 

[AzulEyes]

Thanks for posting. Good stuff (except how he focuses just on women not on BPD men and calling them "whores.")

 

[INTP]

I have a friend(ENFP) who is bipolar, borderline, ADHD amongst other things(which are so many that he cant even remember them all).

For some reason he got really attached to me(apparently i have have one of the purest hearts more valuable than gold, balance him etc) which i dont mind, but its rather annoying to have to constantly reassure him that im not going to abandon him. I mean he can be really awful when in a bad mood and might start to talk loudly about some stranger in a public place mentioning that they smell bad(he also is HSP Highly sensitive person - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia ), are fat or ugly or just in his way.. But for some reason(which he doesent really understand either) he never acts like that towards me and says that im the only person that he can tolerate even if he is feeling bad.

Im not sure if its the same with all borderliners, but when he acts nasty towards others because of his bad mood, its only because he feels so crappy that he just cant keep it in and takes it out on others. Then ofc if he does that to someone he finds dear, he regrets it later and actively avoids people he likes when in bad mood so that he doesent say anything awful(and he has a really sharp tongue and quick temper), except me ofc because he doesent do that to me.

Its like he is normally really caring, empathetic etc who doesent want bad stuff to others, but when in bad mood his shadow comes out and he cant control it..

Dunno really what you are looking for, but maybe this explains something, but do keep in mind that because he has so many other diagnoses, pretty severe traumas and had(and still have) to deal with so much shit that you wouldnt even believe etc. so what i said about him might not apply to others all that much.

 

[AzulEyes]

I have a friend(ENFP) who is bipolar, borderline, ADHD amongst other things(which are so many that he cant even remember them all).

For some reason he got really attached to me(apparently i have have one of the purest hearts more valuable than gold, balance him etc) which i dont mind, but its rather annoying to have to constantly reassure him that im not going to abandon him. I mean he can be really awful when in a bad mood and might start to talk loudly about some stranger in a public place mentioning that they smell bad(he also is HSP Highly sensitive person - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia ), are fat or ugly or just in his way.. But for some reason(which he doesent really understand either) he never acts like that towards me and says that im the only person that he can tolerate even if he is feeling bad.

Im not sure if its the same with all borderliners, but when he acts nasty towards others because of his bad mood, its only because he feels so crappy that he just cant keep it in and takes it out on others. Then ofc if he does that to someone he finds dear, he regrets it later and actively avoids people he likes when in bad mood so that he doesent say anything awful(and he has a really sharp tongue and quick temper), except me ofc because he doesent do that to me.

Its like he is normally really caring, empathetic etc who doesent want bad stuff to others, but when in bad mood his shadow comes out and he cant control it..

Dunno really what you are looking for, but maybe this explains something, but do keep in mind that because he has so many other diagnoses, pretty severe traumas and had(and still have) to deal with so much shit that you wouldnt even believe etc. so what i said about him might not apply to others all that much.

This sounds like my friend (or ex friend?) ;( and you are a really great friend to your ENFP bud.