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Simple ways to joy and happiness

Maverick

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Apr 29, 2007
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880
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ENTJ
The thread on envy made me think about how there is something undeniably tragic about human joy. Once we get accustomed to the object or subject causing us joy, our positive feelings gradually decrease. It seems as being able to experiment joy requires ongoing work. We may be very enthusiastic at the idea of being in a relationship with someone, and experience great joy in the process, only to feel our joy diminish once we are in the relationship since a long time. We might be extremely enthusiastic at the idea of getting that big house we always wanted, only to realize a year after we have purchased it that are initial joy has faded and we are now used to our good.

Happiness demands reminding ourselves constantly of how grateful we are to have what we have. How many of use are not fortunate enough for our good health? For the fact that we leave in a country without war? Knowing that we will probably never be tortured? That our loved ones do not face a big threat of death?

However, easier said than done. I've tried to come up with my own ways to be happy and keep that positive feeling up. Here are some of the ways I've found, there's a little bit for each type (I/E, S/N, F/T, P/J):

- Make a positive comment about someone that genuinely popped up in your head (don't make one just to make one, it will come out fake!)
- Delight yourself in something simple that you have: a glass of water, some bread, a nice bath, etc. and experience consciously what you're doing (i.e. This is such a great bath! It's awesome to have a bath at home).
- If you compare yourself to someone that you feel has more than you, remember that it's relative and that there are also many people that have less than you
- Delight yourself in small achievements: cooking a meal, coming up with a new idea, thinking about a new possibility, pinpointing a feeling you have, understanding what motivated you, clearing up after a meal, etc.
- Stop doing something that you usually do for a couple of days. When you do it again you will remember how satisfying it is. Example: don't use your computer at home for three nights in a row.
- Read a new joke each morning
- Make a list of 5 people close to you and put in 5 positive traits they each have
- Make a list of 5 important things you achieved in the past year
- Do something funny, weird and irrational that you never usually do (Ex: go to sleep in a hotel one night, call a taxi to go to work instead of taking your car or public transport, etc.)

Add anymore ideas you have! Comments welcome.
 

KMCE

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May 9, 2007
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67
- Talk with people. Call your friends. Flirt with women. Get drunk.

- Have sex. A lot of sex.

- Exercise. Try a new sport.

- Go to youtube.com once a week and watch videos of how Paris Hilton and her buddies screw themselves up. (Jail and now what? :D)

- Go to a new restaurant every day for dinner.

- If you do well financially: Instruct your bank to send you your account statement every month by mail.

- For man only: Set your wallpaper to refresh every day with a picture of a new, fresh, and raw woman. That would improve your mood greatly.



And…

- Next time you see your mom tell her you love her. Do it sparingly. :yes:
 

outmywindow

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Apr 23, 2007
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INTP
- Talk with people. Call your friends. Flirt with women. Get drunk.

- Have sex. A lot of sex.

- Exercise. Try a new sport.

- Go to youtube.com once a week and watch videos of how Paris Hilton and her buddies screw themselves up. (Jail and now what? :D)

- Go to a new restaurant every day for dinner.

- If you do well financially: Instruct your bank to send you your account statement every month by mail.

- For man only: Set your wallpaper to refresh every day with a picture of a new, fresh, and raw woman. That would improve your mood greatly.



And…

- Next time you see your mom tell her you love her. Do it sparingly.

This most sounds like advice on how to be an asshole womanizer to me.
 

logan235711

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Apr 29, 2007
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INTJ
study philosophy of ethics : ) it's really about how to make decisions day to day and what justifies ones decisions

some of those advices seem pretty nice, but wouldn't it be more interesting to see how far one can go without doing them and still maintaining the perspective and frame of mind that such activities yield?

ideas of joy and happiness enjoy good insight in the fields of hedonistic utilitarianism for starters, you might want to check that out :)
 

Kyrielle

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Apr 26, 2007
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On occasion, go somewhere without civilisation or sound. Up a mountain, in a desert, out on the ocean.

Take a nap in the sun on the grass.

Do something for someone else without thinking about yourself.

Do something you haven't done since you were a kid, or something you never got to do as a kid...and try to become a that kid again.

Every once in a while, tell everyone you care deeply about how much you care about them and appreciate your relationship with them.
 

Brendan

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Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
911
MBTI Type
ENFJ
- Have sex. A lot of sex.

- Exercise. Try a new sport.
[:offtopic:]

My cousin is rather obese, and has back problems, and her doctor, after telling her she needed to lose massive amounts of weight, said to her, "and there are two ways to lose rapid amounts of weight: olympic swimming and olympic sex"

I then asked my own physician if it also builds muscle, which it apparently does.

I thought it was interesting.

[/:offtopic:]
 

Dufresne

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May 14, 2007
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INFP
I disagree with Maverik slightly. I think that if something truly makes you happy, you should not have to push yourself to appreciate it.

For example, if I go on a hike in the woods, I am genuinely happy. I smile without thinking, "boy, this sure is a nice hike." And if I do say that it is because that is how I feel, not because I am trying to remind myself how nice it is. Hiking truly makes me happy because I don't need reminding.

Do something like, as Maverik suggested, saying "This is such a great bath! It's awesome to have a bath at home" doesn't bring real joy because it is tedious to make sure you remind yourself of that, and it is quite impossible to appreciate every single luxury you have.
 

Zybd03

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Apr 24, 2007
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When joy is really important to you, you do not allow yourself to focus upon things that do not feel good--and the result of thinking only thoughts that feel good would cause you to create a wonderful life filled with all the things that you desire.

Get your eyes, words, and thoughts off of what-is, and put them purely on what you now want. The more you think and speak of what you want, the faster what you want will be yours.
--Hicks, Esther and Jerry, The Law of Attraction
 

The Ü™

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Watching my enemies suffer or tearfully beg for mercy generally brings a smile to my face. Though fantasizing about it is generally enough.

(Don't deny it, you know you want to see your enemies suffer!)

I really don't know what else makes me happy.

The stuff that other people do just doesn't seem enjoyable for me. I hardly see the point in parties or "hanging out" with friends. It just doesn't seem very exciting.

Though I suppose being able to indulge in fantasy brings me the utmost joy. I absolutely hate coming out of that state, because afterwards, I struggle to get back in it and feel mindless in the meantime.

Sometimes I wish I was in a coma, so that I can live in my "dream world" full time.
 

Dufresne

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I couldn't help but notice, Uber Fuhrer, that you said hanging out with friends doesn't seem very fun. Ever tried it? I think it might be more fun than you think

Emotions are hard to convey online, so just know I didn't mean that to be cynical.

Also, I don't think the "joy" in others' suffering is a real joy, but just relief from the pain you feel from hating others.
 

The Ü™

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I'll admit I get simple joys and laughs when I go through the Photoshop jobs here. Pretty hilarious stuff.
 

Crabapple

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Apr 24, 2007
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The thread on envy made me think about how there is something undeniably tragic about human joy. Once we get accustomed to the object or subject causing us joy, our positive feelings gradually decrease. It seems as being able to experiment joy requires ongoing work....

Hmmm. I'm sort of stupidly happy. I find it very easy to be joyful about simple things. I'm glad for a food, a bed, to have cats....But then, I think my life experiences haven't been the American Average.

When I am unhappy, one of things I've learned to do are Gratitudes. When I get to feeling down, I will lie in bed and think of all the things that I'm grateful for, and grateful to be able to say "Not yet" about. So I would say gratitude is a key component to joy.

I also really enjoy walking barefoot in the grass when the dew is cool and sweet, and listening to the morning song of the birds.
 

htb

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I need to find someone to play that with-that or Munchkin.
Xbox Live was my medium -- for a good couple of weeks, my friends and I played the XBL Arcade version of Catan. Splendid fun.
 

spartan26

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Apr 29, 2007
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Master difficulties in life and appreciate the challenge that you went through. Whether it's becoming friends with co-workers you used to hate, (or who hated on you), doing that difficult task that used to take for hours in a matter of minutes or adjusting to overcome character flaws and personal short commings. When you humbly accept your weaknesses, learn to make peace with your burdens, and look thankfully at the new chances to succeed that come with each new day, you'll become closer to a lasting joy.
 
R

RDF

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Master difficulties in life and appreciate the challenge that you went through. Whether it's becoming friends with co-workers you used to hate, (or who hated on you), doing that difficult task that used to take for hours in a matter of minutes or adjusting to overcome character flaws and personal short commings. When you humbly accept your weaknesses, learn to make peace with your burdens, and look thankfully at the new chances to succeed that come with each new day, you'll become closer to a lasting joy.

Nice! :nice:

I agree. A lot of times we're stuck with a set daily routine and a fixed circle of coworkers, family, and acquaintances. Getting a new perspective on an old problem, finding a way through some of the clutter, or even just learning how to live in the moment and enjoy the day and the people around us can be a real source of satisfaction.

FL
 
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