• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

do you like change?

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
Probably already a thread about this, but so what deal with it.

so what do you think about change?

me? I hate it my first thought is maybe i should kill myself so i don't have to deal with the change.
 

nanook

a scream in a vortex
Joined
Jul 22, 2007
Messages
1,361
yeah, i feel you.

i feel different about different types of change perhaps....

the worst is having to reorient socially, in a context where you can't be yourself anyway. the horror of re-programming yourself into something you don't care about, taking in their rules and shit. pure terror.

the most essential dichotomy is probably between change that comes from within and change that comes at you from the outside.

i like change from within. beginning with my self changing (all by itself, growth), but also me changing my visions: toys, computer set-up, artwork, blog design, etc, although, maybe I prefer stages of perceived perfection of such things, to having to work on them ... , depends .. i definitely enjoy something that just works the way it is
 
R

RDF

Guest
Probably the biggest change I ever encountered was when I shipped off to Marine Corps boot camp at age 18. I had no idea what to expect, and in fact it was pretty much unlike anything I had ever encountered previously.

They were doing the whole boot camp thing: Shaving people’s heads, drill instructors yelling at everyone, us shuffling through lines while they issued our gear to us, etc. I wasn’t worried by any of it; there were 100 of us in the platoon going through it all together, and I figured I could hold up as well as anyone.

The main thing was just not to freak out with all the hyperactivity and yelling and running around and unfamiliarity of it all. So basically I just shut down and shuffled through those first couple days like a zombie. I just sat in the back of my brain and watched it all like it was through a window or on TV, and waited for night to come so I could turn off the TV and crash for the night.

And in fact it was kind of fun. It was an interesting TV show, when I shut down my circuits enough and just zombied through it. Then, after a couple days, I got my bearings and re-engaged with the people and enviroment around me.

And that’s kind of been my model for big changes later in life: Just kind of shut down, shuffle through the first day or so like a zombie and go through the steps mechanically, watch the TV show in front of my eyes with vague curiosity, and then re-engage when I get my bearings.

Good luck, prpl. I'm sure you'll enjoy your upcoming adventure, once you get past that first day or two.
 

INTP

Active member
Joined
Jul 31, 2009
Messages
7,803
MBTI Type
intp
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx
change can be scary, but in the end its good.
 

Lark

Active member
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
29,569
Probably already a thread about this, but so what deal with it.

so what do you think about change?

me? I hate it my first thought is maybe i should kill myself so i don't have to deal with the change.

Killing yourself is always a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I'm pretty life affirming and wouldnt consider that ever as an option.

Anyway, so far as change goes, its got a pretty pivotal point in my own political, social and philosophical views so it is important. I think some change should be resisted, some should be accepted and even supported. What is important is that it is change for the better and I do recognise that whether its an individual or an entire social system that there are things which are in play constantly, they are almost human perrenials:-

1 - A familiar but bad situation is often preferable to an unfamiliar, untested or new situation. It is why, for instance, that the victims of domestic violence prefer to remain in that situation as contemplate the alternatives. Or the alcoholic or junky will return to their addictions or relapse, particularly if being an addict has been integrated into their personality and been who and what they are for long enough.

2 - Rapid, pell, nell change, inorganic change in response to or driven by external intervention, is not likely to be successful or sustainable in the long term if it is not accompanied by an organic change within the individual or system which is the target of change.

3 - The benefits of change are almost always overestimated, this is probably the greatest reason for recidivism in individuals making a bid for change which I have encountered, I think perhaps that this is a major factor in change being reversed on the societal level too.

On the individual level I've encountered quite fantastical thinking, most of the time what is being aimed at is not fantastical, for instance in recovery from depressive illness or addiction it is often about restoring or achieving "ordinary misery" in the place of addiction/depression and its consequences, instead I hear people tell me, perhaps its because they need it as a motivational spring, that with change they will achieve things which is is unlikely that someone without either addiction or depression, and with other advantages, could not achieve in any case.

On the societal level I see the same thing happen, this or that reform or adjustment or change being campaigned for with ill defined or fantastical expectations and hopes, this all by itself can, especially if those expecations are confounded give rise to other and greater resistance to change attempts in the future.
 

Mole

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 20, 2008
Messages
20,284
At first we couldn't even change our own nappies.

And we weren't even able to modulate (change) our own emotions.

So we were dependent on our parents to change our nappies and modulate our emotions.
 

RaptorWizard

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 19, 2012
Messages
5,895
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
People who have aspergers like me don't respond well to change and especially in social environments.
 

sprinkles

Mojibake
Joined
Jul 5, 2012
Messages
2,959
MBTI Type
INFJ
The only constant is change.

I don't particularly like nor dislike it.

Some times I'm startled or annoyed by a specific change, but over all change is what runs everything. It wouldn't make sense for me to dislike it.

The talk about 'change' is what I dislike. Especially in politics. Talk is cheap especially when they don't know what they are talking about.
 

Salomé

meh
Joined
Sep 25, 2008
Messages
10,527
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I don't like the way it weighs my pockets down.

As far as reasons for killing yourself go, it's not up there with the best.
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,037
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
496
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I grew up with a mother who was restless and thrived on change, so we moved every year on average and lived in many diverse environments from a reclusive Christian mission in the middle of the desert, to a metropolitan city in Alabama, to a wild west town in Wyoming. My life constantly changed and the people came and went so fast I never made friends, but observed many different cultures of people. I craved some consistency and lived for 14 years in the midwest during my higher education, but had learned that people are typically really nice and interesting right at first and then go bad after you know them. Every time I've moved since I was ready. A few years ago everything in my life changed as I went through a very unstable time. Now it is settled and stable, and I'm relieved, but I don't fear change because in a strange way it is my constant. I know much more is coming. Impermanence.
 

Such Irony

Honor Thy Inferior
Joined
Jul 23, 2010
Messages
5,059
MBTI Type
INtp
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
It depends on the change. If its change for the better, I usually like it. Things like getting a better job, moving to a better place, etc. There is still some anxiety with the change and sacrifices I have to make but its usually worth it.

If its change for the worse, then no. Things like losing a loved one, losing a job, friend moving away, etc. I'm capable as most in adjusting the new circumstances but I'd much prefer that things were the way they used to be. Even though there can sometimes be a silver lining.

If someone wants to make a change just for the sake of change and expects me to go along with it, I'm generally not too happy about it. Why fix what isn't broken.

On the other hand, if I'm bored and want more variety in life, then I welcome change. I like to vary the route to work or go to a store I normally don't go to.
 
A

Anew Leaf

Guest
Wherever there is change there is opportunity for something new to come of it.

So I embrace change because it means I have a chance to do something better this time. :)
 

Lark

Active member
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
29,569
I like changes of girl friend, I want to experience that so much and so quickly that I'll not remember any of them that it'll be a blur.
 

nanook

a scream in a vortex
Joined
Jul 22, 2007
Messages
1,361
so there is change that comes from the outside (you adapting in the most passive manner) or from the inside (you changing, getting creative, doing things). these are the two introverted default options. also you can imprint external/incoming change with your own personality, through how you respond, thereby making it into your own. that's what extroverted people usually do. i would often feel, that i don't dare to do that. but what's underlying is the decision that it would be better for me, if i didn't do that. and it might be true. because imposing my personality on anything that involves normal people, that might just lead to big lethal detonations. so then, when this decisions becomes unconscious, i interpret the following behaviour of mine (passive adaption) as a compulsion or phobia and tell myself: oh but i would like to be myself. yeah, i would like to. but i have decided not to. because, originally, i perceived the situation to be scary, not my behaviour. the situation is TNT, my behaviour is just naturally vibrant. but i would rather experience myself as being afraid of my own possible shaking, or locked into my fear of shaking, thus into being unable to shake, than i would like to experience myself as being afraid of a world full of TNT, ready to blow up. the former is a mild neurotic fear, the latter is a cosmic existential vulnerability. people are fucking dangerous. they hate me, what i represent, and if i try to impose my personality on common ways, they might put my lights out. true story. in principle, not in detail. that's why i like to go unconscious about my decision. it's involuntarily. i don't seem to have the will power to direct my awareness to the acuteness of danger. so that is the story of what they call-social phobia, or schizoid paranoid PD.
 
Top