how do you react when someone yells at you

[ChocolateMoose123]

yeah i yell back at first

but the rest is how i am in such situations, and as a result people end up trusting me more in the long run

i've never been accused of stealing but whenever something is stolen and i'm the room/building and it's annouced my instinct is they're gonna accuse me, even though i had no clue until they annouced it.

Why do you feel guilty if you aren't? I have never understood this in others but I'm aware that it is common to feel this way.

 

[prplchknz]

Why do you feel guilty if you aren't? I have never understood this in others but I'm aware that it is common to feel this way.

its not guilt, more like anxiety/paranoia

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

its not guilt, more like anxiety/paranoia

Ok. Makes sense. Is this an initial passing reaction or something that stays with you? - feeling that you will be accused or that you cannot defend yourself from being accused?

 

[prplchknz]

Ok. Makes sense. Is this an initial passing reaction or something that stays with you? - feeling that you will be accused or that you cannot defend yourself from being accused?

i guess stays to varying degrees. its always a possibilty in the back of my mind, but certain events makes it more noticible

 

[á´…eparted]

It depends.

If I am in a position of authority, I am completely unphased.

If it's someone who holds authority over me, and they are jusitifed or I could have potentially done wrong, I utterly fall apart.

 

[chubber]

People yelling at me and if I don't have any facts to back myself up I just shut down. Until I get my facts...

 

[GIjade]

I, as everyone knows, yell all the time. It's my way of releasing the anger. If someone somehow took away my ability to yell about something, I might kill someone. So, you see, it's better to just let me yell, knowing you'll get away alive.

 

[prplchknz]

I, as everyone knows, yell all the time. It's my way of releasing the anger. If someone somehow took away my ability to yell about something, I might kill someone. So, you see, it's better to just let me yell, knowing you'll get away alive.

I didn't ask if you yelled in fact i don't really care because lot of people yell and i can't stop that. I asked the reaction to other people yelling. if i wanted to know if you yelled i would've asked.

 

[Lark]

I dont know if I've responded already, I dont freeze, I dont think that I react how most people do or would as I have more experience of it than most.

How do you best respond is what to ask yourself and the most you can do to keep your cerebral as opposed to reptilian brain in charge the better.

 

[GIjade]

I didn't ask if you yelled in fact i don't really care because lot of people yell and i can't stop that. I asked the reaction to other people yelling. if i wanted to know if you yelled i would've asked.

you look like an angry hen. but ok, here's how i respond to someone who yells at me. i yell back. Or, in your case, I call you an angry hen and giggle.

 

[Captain_Invincible]

There is this French man called Pierre inside my mind, smoking a cigarette over coffee in cafe in Paris in black and white. He appears when someone yells at me. He keeps me calm and composed most of the time.

 

[prplchknz]

you look like an angry hen. but ok, here's how i respond to someone who yells at me. i yell back. Or, in your case, I call you an angry hen and giggle.

That's fine. At least you answered the question

btw i wasn't yelling, but based on your response i kind of understand why you think everyone is conflict avoidant just saying

 

[fetus]

I cry and am unable to function. I don't deal well with stress at all.

 

[magpie]

My reaction is probably somewhere between this

and this

 

[Dyslexxie]

Yeah I don't have an issue with confrontation so if someone yells at me I'll probably spend a good few seconds processing, and usually I'll give them a really weird look which will often make them back off, like this:

But if they get bitchy I know how to handle arguments.

 

[Masokissed]

I give them a look of disgust because yelling is so annoying. Or I laugh. Or I cry. It depends.

 

[Mole]

The first thing I do is inhibit my response lest I respond in kind.

Then I speak to them in a kindly and calm manner, and often enough they respond in kind.

This is the power of conversation - we are inclined to respond in kind.

So to a degree, we have the power to determine the kind of response we want - but it all depends on emotional restraint.

And emotional restraint is the hallmark of emotional intelligence.

 

[Galaxy Gazer]

Well, it depends.

If they're yelling at me for doing something wrong or making a mistake, I get defensive and yell back, even if they're totally right. I may be painfully shy, but I will never let it be said that I'm passive.

If they're yelling at me in a debatey-fighty kind of way, I stay really calm while they freak out. It's fun. I do this with a certain ISFJ often.

 

[Thalassa]

I always yell back. Anyone who yells is open to question. Truly powerful people are calm.

 

[Yama]

I've answered before but I have more experience now.

If it's a stranger? I pretend like I'm not phased and that nothing is wrong but I'm internally crying and want to just run away somewhere to hide and cry.

Friend? Idk hasn't happened. Sometimes they've talked to me strictly though and that just makes me want to cry kind of but I don't.

Immediate family... I yell back and I can be kind of malicious, we fuel each others' anger until I break down and start crying in front of them.

Basically, angry atmospheres make me want to cry but I don't like expressing that in front of others.