There are tons of books and advice for introverts

[Lark]

But none for extroverts. That's despite a lot of people wanting to identify as extroverts, at least that was my experience in my teens when I knew only one person who proudly claimed to be introverted.

 

[Thalassa]

What should the books be called?

When To Know How To Leave Other People the Hell Alone

That's a book I'd actually like to give some people. Although I'm not sure it really has anything to do with introversion or extroversion. My ESFJ friend, raging extrovert though she is, knows when to back off or when people don't feel like talking. She's got that Fe.

I know a pretty extreme aspie-seeming introvert who has to be told twice "I don't feel like talking right now" or that people don't want to hear what he's saying when they're eating. I've even told him "I don't care" before and he just pauses and finishes his sentence. It's utterly bizarre, I think he's like a 65 year old ISTJ, not at all senile, keeps a job his entire life, never diagnosed with Aspergers...but so help me god he's mildly socially retarded.

So what would the books be called, hmm? What would they be about?

 

[dala]

I don't think it really occurs to Extraverts that there is any other way to be, whereas lots of people see intraversion as something that needs fixing. You'd be as likely to find a book called 'So, your teenager is straight.'

 

[Poki]

I don't think it really occurs to Extraverts that there is any other way to be, whereas lots of people see intraversion as something that needs fixing. You'd be as likely to find a book called 'So, your teenager is straight.'

Most extroverts seem to be much more pushy of there point of view then introverts. Its part of what makes them extroverted Us introverts just sit back and decide if we want to hang out with them or not.

 

[Poki]

What should the books be called?

When To Know How To Leave Other People the Hell Alone

That's a book I'd actually like to give some people. Although I'm not sure it really has anything to do with introversion or extroversion. My ESFJ friend, raging extrovert though she is, knows when to back off or when people don't feel like talking. She's got that Fe.

I know a pretty extreme aspie-seeming introvert who has to be told twice "I don't feel like talking right now" or that people don't want to hear what he's saying when they're eating. I've even told him "I don't care" before and he just pauses and finishes his sentence. It's utterly bizarre, I think he's like a 65 year old ISTJ, not at all senile, keeps a job his entire life, never diagnosed with Aspergers...but so help me god he's mildly socially retarded.

So what would the books be called, hmm? What would they be about?

It would be called "How to slow down"

 

[Thalassa]

Most extroverts seem to be much more pushy of there point of view then introverts. Its part of what makes them extroverted Us introverts just sit back and decide if we want to hang out with them or not.

I don't that's necessarily true. I believe what you're talking about is Je, not introversion and extroversion.

 

[Thalassa]

It would be called "How to slow down"

You don't think IxTJs are ever in a hurry?

I don't think that has to do much with I/E, though again, this may have something to do with Je. Especially in ESxJs.

 

[Poki]

I don't that's necessarily true. I believe what you're talking about is Je, not introversion and extroversion.

LMAO...are you J? or do you just not believe you are pushy?

 

[Poki]

You don't think IxTJs are ever in a hurry?

I don't think that has to do much with I/E, though again, this may have something to do with Je. Especially in ESxJs.

The IxTJs I know are generally not in a hurry.

 

[Thalassa]

LMAO...are you J? or do you just not believe you are pushy?

I'm not J but I have Je...and so it's highly likely that I am an ExFP who has tertiary Te which you see more on the forum. But if you were around me IRL, you would be shocked. I've had people meet me from this forum and I am not what they expected. I think I have yet to meet a person who isn't even a little surprised that I'm different IRL.

I'm not at all pushy IRL, in fact I sometimes HIDE from people, unless I need something or I'm pissed off, then you will see my Te.

But yes I know I'm very Fi/Te on the forum, and it is intentional much of the time.

 

[Thalassa]

The IxTJs I know are generally not in a hurry.

ISTJs often seem pretty busy to me, and I don't know that ExxPs are such hurried souls.

 

[Phoenix]

I'm a hyper withdrawn extrovert and I have severe problems with people not being able to understand my nature. I would rather that they understand me personally as opposed to everyone of my type based on introversion/extroversion because those still carry assumptions and generalizations that may or may not apply to me in their entirety.

What I've taken to doing is showing the people who are closest to me bits and pieces of the descriptions that sound most like me - while sharing my own insight as to how they apply.

I wouldn't want someone to read just my type descriptions or a book that contains massive generalizations when I can do the best job of explaining my own behaviour directly -- hence no more labels [except the variant stacking, which not many people understand anyways]. Too many pre-conceived notions that alter perceptions and colour interactions.

 

[Poki]

ISTJs often seem pretty busy to me, and I don't know that ExxPs are such hurried souls.

I agree that ExxPs are not hurried souls, but it doesnt mean they dont move quickly and alot.

edit: and I think that hurried IxxJs are more on a mission where the end result is to slow down.

 

[gromit]

and I think that hurried IxxJs are more on a mission where the end result is to slow down.

Heheh this cracks me up.

 

[Gish]

http://www.amazon.com/Go-F-Sleep-Adam-Mansbach/dp/1617750255/ref=pd_sim_b_1

 

[Aquarelle]

I don't think it really occurs to Extraverts that there is any other way to be, whereas lots of people see intraversion as something that needs fixing. You'd be as likely to find a book called 'So, your teenager is straight.'

This is exactly right, I think. Society (at least in the US) puts a lot of pressure on introverts to act like extroverts, so there are both a lot of books on "How to be extroverted" and "Being an introvert is okay!"

 

[Z Buck McFate]

I don't think it really occurs to Extraverts that there is any other way to be, whereas lots of people see intraversion as something that needs fixing. You'd be as likely to find a book called 'So, your teenager is straight.'

Yep. And fixing things that aren't broke is an introverted trait- so in addition to there being less occasion for extraverts to see 'extraversion' as a hindrance, extraverts are less inclined to want to 'fix' what isn't absolutely necessary in the first place.

 

[Poki]

I am actually happy being an introvert...its not the "how" that I struggle with its the "whats the point" that I dont get.

 

[Laurie]

I've started to think the "introvert" self help books are actually for shy people. I'm shy. And extroverted.

 

[KDude]

I'm not shy exactly.. I might single individuals out and strike up something.. but consider myself introverted. I can hang out by myself for months. I'm sure I've been solitary 85-90 percent of my life. I don't need or want any help.