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Are people as rude and rotten on forums, IRL?

Betty Blue

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Unknown. Depends on the individual. With the anonymity comes the freedom to say w.e you want, with very little consequence.

Personally, I'm not myself on the forum/vent. Completely different in real life. I don't know what it is about the internet that makes me so loud/obnoxious. I'm actually rather "serious" irl in comparison to YWIR, I lack patience to be so "playful"...

I think most people come online to troll, and just have fun, and be someone "different", since it has no real consequence.

This is why I don't really understand why some people take the forum so seriously, and sometimes, even personally.

Good points. Funnily enough i think i come accross as far more serious on here than irl. I can be incredibly serious irl but i'm very playful and have boundless energy, i love the rap and banter of rl conversations which i think is pretty difficult to do in a forum. I havn't tried out vent yet.... i don't know anything about it, i feel a bit intimadated if i am really honest.
 

Stigmata

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And yet people are actually "typing" forum members, while completely ignoring that.

The futility to that is relative to how much the other person is how much truth leaks through the facade. With the internet, you have the ability to directly manipulate the perception you give off, and thus what others see is only based on what you've carefully selected.

Do most people reveal their thoughts or feelings when they risk a harsh, negative responce? Some probably do. I'd venture to say that most people do not. On a psychology focused forum, I think this is a loss. It is a loss of all information that may have developed if said person had not been shut down.

No. I think since you aren't given the actual privilege of actually seeing a physical reaction through what is said, most things are done pretty impersonally. Being reduced to nothing more than a small picture is dehumanization, and thus allows us to act outside of our own personal code of ethics with little credence given to the fact that we are dealing with real people.
 

tinker683

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*calmly awaits someone to post the Internet Fuckwad image macro*

As for me...who I am on these forums is not quite the person in real life. In real life I'm generally *MUCH* more stoical and reserved as that's how men* generally are expected to be. On these forums though I wear a lot of my heart on my sleeve in my posts, which is also why I'm very picky about where and what I comment on as I know, personally, that I don't have the time or the desire to get really involved with a topic.

*Note: By "men" I mean men in the traditional sense. While I do in fact do my own thing, by and large I try to keep any behavior and/or expressions of emotions within social norms.
 

skylights

i love
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anon delivers :laugh:

greater-internet-fuckwad-theory.jpg
 
P

Phantonym

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Anyone thats studied psychology should understand that you must provide a safe, nonjudgemental haven for others to reveal the depths of their psyche.

You've just discovered that other part, the nasty one, of their deep psyche. Tada, it exists, in every single one of us.

Do you think people are as rude in RL as they are on forums?

Maybe about the same, maybe a bit better, maybe a lot worse, but they might hide it better in "real life". It also depends on the person and the circumstances and whatever. People might surprise you either way.
 

iwakar

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With that said, I am curious if this rude, rotten, "shutting one down" behavior is exaggerated online simply because we can hide behind a monitor, an avatar, a username, and log-off and away from any real consequence to our words.

Do you think people are as rude in RL as they are on forums?

Sometimes, but rarely. I believe this depersonalization is more likely to occur in some types than others and in some age groups or cultures than others, but we're all at risk for it. I'm pretty sure this lack of visual empathy has been linked to the phenomenon of road rage as well.
 

Santosha

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You've just discovered that other part, the nasty one, of their deep psyche. Tada, it exists, in every single one of us

I think your right. Its still baffles, like psuedo ethics or something. Right now I wish I could find a clip of two shrinks beating the shit out of eachother for disagreeance on anger-management technique. :devil:
 

prplchknz

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Your point is?

my point is that people get frustrated online and accuse of you of shit without really knowing you. and everything posted on a forum should be taken with a block of salt
 

Lark

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I think the worst examples of the sort of behaviour described in the OP probably arent contained to online mediums, people who're like that probably dont have the internal kill switches most people do which stop them behaving that way, it probably is exhibited much more online because in person, apart from professionals or business, people simply dont have to deal with it they can walk away.

Online everyone imagines they have an audience, a gallery of willing listeners and possibly supporters, in real life it becomes pretty apparent quickly that you dont.

Plus online I think people are likely to believe they are engaged in something a lot less mundane than real life, so instead of discussing something with someone who may have a different opinion you're striking a blow for justice against the wrongdoing agents of evil bigotry, with cheering supporters and sympathisers looking on. Its fantasy but it appeals more than reality.
 
R

RDF

Guest
I think the worst examples of the sort of behaviour described in the OP probably arent contained to online mediums, people who're like that probably dont have the internal kill switches most people do which stop them behaving that way, it probably is exhibited much more online because in person, apart from professionals or business, people simply dont have to deal with it they can walk away.

Online everyone imagines they have an audience, a gallery of willing listeners and possibly supporters, in real life it becomes pretty apparent quickly that you dont.

Plus online I think people are likely to believe they are engaged in something a lot less mundane than real life, so instead of discussing something with someone who may have a different opinion you're striking a blow for justice against the wrongdoing agents of evil bigotry, with cheering supporters and sympathisers looking on. Its fantasy but it appeals more than reality.

Great points. Also there are territoriality issues. If someone has invested a lot of time building up a persona or staking out a position (perhaps as a proponent of a certain viewpoint), it may be tough to yield in the face of strong opposition.
 

xisnotx

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Anyone thats studied psychology should understand that you must provide a safe, nonjudgemental haven for others to reveal the depths of their psyche.

Some of my biggest insights have come because someone thought I was an idiot, explicitly told me so, and left me seething. It's been plenty productive for me.
I try not to say anything on the forum that I wouldn't in real life...so if I'm perceived as a jerk here..I'm guessing I'm perceived as a jerk in real life as well...it's just people in real life are too scared (read polite) to say anything..lol

And I disagree..I think people are just as immature and catty in real life..it's just hidden behind this wall of "politeness". If you listen closely though you can easily identify the immaturity behind the wall.

And, tbh, I like the internet better than real life...or rather I like people who are like people on the internet. It might not be pretty..but it's honest.
 

Orangey

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What are the benefits of personal attacks and "shutting one down?"

Well these things certainly put a greater amount of pressure on the interlocutor, so even if the person persists in ideas that are "wrong" or stupid, they would have at least had to think harder about it (and in a shorter span of time) than if they were coddled. It shakes people out of complacency.
 

Santosha

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Well these things certainly put a greater amount of pressure on the interlocutor, so even if the person persists in ideas that are "wrong" or stupid, they would have at least had to think harder about it (and in a shorter span of time) than if they were coddled. It shakes people out of complacency.

I see your point. I think a better way to shake people from complacency is to offer up legitimate reasons why the idea is bad, or doesn't work. Atleast that is what has made me think in the past. Hauling off and saying things like "your an idiot" "your a child" "your immature" only discredits the offender in my eyes, and leads me to believe they have no other insight to go off of. :)
 

Such Irony

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Just reading the title of this thread, no. There aren't even 1/3 as many consequences to acting out on the internet and on forums as there are in real life. Social interactions online vs. in real life are much different. You'll see a lot more acting out online.

9 out of 10 times the answer is no. The anonymity of the internet allows users to both embrace different aspects of their existing personality, or create an entirely new one, without ever having to face real repercussions for their actions. This allows to respond in ways that, for whatever reason, they couldn't do so in real life, and thus forums become an outlet for those neglected areas. The emotionally immature are much more likely to exploit this than more well-rounded individuals.

Sometimes, but rarely. I believe this depersonalization is more likely to occur in some types than others and in some age groups or cultures than others, but we're all at risk for it. I'm pretty sure this lack of visual empathy has been linked to the phenomenon of road rage as well.

You all raise good points.

I also think that people sometimes use forums as a place to vent, which some may misconstrue as rudeness. It depends on what the person is venting about and how it's said. In the real world, there are things that can't be said even though they are thought without repercussions. It can be risky to express an unpopular and potentially offensive opinion in real life. If the person feels strongly about the opinion, they may resort to forums as a safer place to express the side of themselves they suppress in real life.
 

Rail Tracer

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People do tend to be (at least a little to a lot more) rude more so than they are in real life. It probably just has to do for the fact that you can't see the other person you are talking to on the other side of the screen.

Some people feel protected, so they can be as rude as they want. While others aren't able to see other people, so it is harder to gauge to what extent is being inflicted on another person.
 
G

Glycerine

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I would say that sometimes I am nicer on here than in real life.
 
T

ThatGirl

Guest
At thread title, it is probably why they are on the internet and not hanging out with real people if you know what I mean....


At least that is why I am here. :p
 
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