My body is gaslighting me.

[Haphazard]

We know some facts.

1. You cannot be hurt if you are not swollen/bruised/bleeding.

2. I have never swollen, bruised, or bled.

3. Therefore, I cannot have ever been hurt.

And yet I still experience pain without swelling/bruising/bleeding.

My body is gaslighting me. It's trying to make me crazy. How do I make it stop abusing me.

 

[Haphazard]

I guess there's one alternate explanation.

I mean even pain that comes from not swelling and bruising and bleeding can make me faint, so swelling and bruising and bleeding must be so insanely painful that I would probably kill myself if that ever happened...

 

[Haphazard]

Then again, this is why the therapists hate me, there's nothing to solve. It all makes perfect logical sense, so what can they possibly tell me?

 

[Bamboo]

Sounds neurological or psychological.

Gone to a neurologist?

Is this something chronic or just that spontaneously developed recently?

 

[Haphazard]

I am not in pain right now.

And I'm pretty sure I've never been in pain.

 

[Bamboo]

Are you ok?

 

[Haphazard]

I don't know.

 

[Haphazard]

I mean think about it, I've never had so much as a twisted ankle.

 

[Vasilisa]

You cannot be hurt if you are not swollen/bruised/bleeding.

I disagree

My body is gaslighting me. It's trying to make me crazy. How do I make it stop abusing me.

The only way is to not stop advocating for yourself to those who may have the knowledge or ability to help you.


Love that movie so much, by the way.

 

[Haphazard]

So I guess it goes like this.

Every time I might have injured myself, there's a minute or so of pain so intense I'm literally blacking out. However, by the time it fades, I'm not actually injured at all. There's no evidence of injury. There's no swelling, and all pain is gone within about fifteen minutes.

The logical thing to think is that because this actually doesn't result in injury, I'm just such an obscenely wimpy person that if I actually were injured, say, even a sprained ankle, I would be in what I would describe as terribly obscene amounts of pain and probably be in so much pain as to be unresponsive. This is logical, because obviously not being injured hurts less than actually being injured.

Unless I secretly have some kind of neurological disorder that nobody's told me about, I mean seriously.

 

[Haphazard]

I don't have fibromyalga, I know that.