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  1. #11
    Senior Member Chaotic Harmony's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    9w1 sx


    There are different levels of change for me... Change that I know is coming... Change that is sudden... And change that I was given advanced warning about...

    Change that I know is coming....
    This would be like your high school example... I knew someday I would graduate and I had a very definite time line on when to expect that change to happen. So I was able to prepare myself for it. I even took some college classes prior to graduation to get a feel for what to expect.

    Change that is sudden...
    I don't handle this type of change very well because I wasn't given a chance to prepare for it. This happened in my job... My boss came back from a meeting and told me "You'll be handling this, this, and this from now on." I went into panic mode because I wasn't able to prepare myself for the change. I didn't have a plan of action ready and it threw me off balance.

    Change that I was given advanced warning about...
    This is similar to the first one... It was a change that I wasn't expecting, but was given enough of an advanced warning to prepare myself for the change. It gave me time to run scenarios through my head and prepare for what might happen when the change occurred.

  2. #12
    Senior Member Tabula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    9w1 so/sx


    I don't hate it; I'm afraid of it.

    I've long since realized that I slip into, and become complacent in, routine rather quickly, and sooner or later, I find myself inexplicably frustrated and wanting to gouge out my eyeballs with a rusty spoon. Change is necessary for my health, and I'm willing to bet this doesn't apply to me only.

    For whatever reason, I expected my life to move fluidly from one period to the next. I never considered what exactly had to happen to get to that next point and so felt nakedly unprepared as I exited the familiar classroom doors for the last time --namely, the fact that it requires an actual, specifically-directed expenditure of energy on my part, overcoming anxiety, dealings in failure, and understanding that I can't be a master/perfect/completely learned at everything before I even try it. I'm still dealing with these, but recognizing them has made it a little easier, as well as acknowledging that everyone goes through it in some form or another and that it doesn't matter if I embarrass myself in the process. Others are more concerned with their own issues to much bother about how incompetent or stupid I am.

    I'd say it's an incarnation of that clichéd "fear of the unknown"--which seems to translate, in you, as "hate." It seems you've placed yourself in direct, seeming confrontational opposition to it. But, you'd obviously know better than I.

  3. #13
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010


    I have a sort of dual nature. I hate change that involves location. If I could have had the choice, I would still live in the same general area where I grew up. My friends are mostly people I have been friends with for 20 years or so.

    On the other hand, I am a big risk taker in other areas of life. We were foster parents and I loved getting that phone call out of nowhere telling us there was a child who needed us. It was a real thrill to be able to rush to help a child and welcome them into our home and make them feel comfortable with our family.

    So weird - major security freak on one hand, major risk taker on the other.

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