How do you act around racists?

[neptunesnet]

Rather than justifying, it's accepting certain things as reality so it can be dealt with. I think avoiding it is just going to do more damage.

Never said anything about avoiding it. That's kind of where the "evolve past it" part comes in.

 

[Thalassa]

Never said anything about avoiding it. That's kind of where the "evolve past it" part comes in.

Right.

So what you're saying is that people use it to excuse their racism? I think I see what you're saying now.

 

[mrcockburn]

And by in-breeding, we will eventually resolve those cultural differences.

Oh yes. If you're marrying your brother, there won't be any ethnic differences to discriminate against.

 

[Abstract Thinker]

Oh yes. If you're marrying your brother, there won't be any ethnic differences to discriminate against.

Seriously? You goin there? Wow.

All good, but mark my words... one race, less problems.

 

[Thalassa]

Seriously? You goin there? Wow.

All good, but mark my words... one race, less problems.

Doubtful. People will still find a way to hoard money or power or discriminate against people for some reason.

 

[Abstract Thinker]

^ Sadly, probably true.

I can dream though, can't I?

 

[angell_m]

I was going to write something... and then... I thought... racism is such a boring topic. Ugh.

 

[Snuggletron]

I don't find that many blatantly racis people. I found some where my dad lives (Andrews South Carolina), but still not very many who were outright racis. If someone is "racis" in a humourous way, I usually don't mind it. I enjoy a decent racial joke. It's not like real racism, which makes me a bit uncomfortable to be around. It's quite pitiful, though. Because the real biggoty bigots who are outspoken and not ashamed are a bit of a joke themselves.

 

[KDude]

I was going to write something... and then... I thought... racism is such a boring topic. Ugh.

^Perhaps you should google some lynching pics or scour the net for a vid of some skinheads curbstomping a chinese guy.

Then come back and tell us all how boring it is

 

[Snuggletron]

he lives in Norway, I'm pretty sure the racism there is boring.

 

[KDude]

^Racism has gotten pretty bad in all of black metal circles over there, from what I can tell.

I understand that's a bit isolated though. I would not be so mean as to associate all of Norway with black metal (besides, I'm part norwegian myself).

 

[neptunesnet]

I don't find that many blatantly racis people. I found some where my dad lives (Andrews South Carolina), but still not very many who were outright racis. If someone is "racis" in a humourous way, I usually don't mind it. I enjoy a decent racial joke. It's not like real racism, which makes me a bit uncomfortable to be around. It's quite pitiful, though. Because the real biggoty bigots who are outspoken and not ashamed are a bit of a joke themselves.

The blatant racists aren't the ones I worry about. At least I know they hold some irrational fear about POCs that ultimately have nothing to do with us but more so with some deeply rooted insecurity or psychological issue they've left unattended. What I worry about are the liberal apologists who find "decent racial jokes" hilarious without realizing how damaging they actually are. The ones who laugh at the same stereotypes & racist imagery that have gotten countless minorities killed, lynched, unjustly sentenced, alienated, & persecuted (among other things) without realizing how much they're trivializing that struggle & that pain.

Oh and don't get me started on ironic racists!


EDIT: I used the word "liberal" loosely there. Meant more "socially progressive," "open-minded" without necessarily the political associations attached to it.

 

[Thalassa]

The blatant racists aren't the ones I worry about. At least I know they hold some irrational fear about POCs that ultimately have nothing to do with us but more so with some deeply rooted insecurity or psychological issue they've left unattended. What I worry about are the liberal apologists who find "decent racial jokes" hilarious without realizing how damaging they actually are. The ones who laugh at the same stereotypes & racist imagery that have gotten countless minorities killed, lynched, unjustly sentenced, alienated, & persecuted (among other things) without realizing how much they're trivializing that struggle & that pain.

Oh and don't get me started on ironic racists!

Yeah, I'm not a fan of ironic racism either. On some level it makes me deeply uncomfortable. My ex had internalized racism against Spanish-speaking Mexican people...and he's racially half Mexican...and that made me uncomfortable.

However, there's a degree of liberal apologizing that gets on my nerves, though, because it starts to seem forced and inauthentic and borders on "hate whitey" (if not glibly advocating such) and I can't hang with that, either.

 

[LEGERdeMAIN]

I've heard this argument before, and I've always thought it was bollocks (no disrespect to you, esp since I don't think you're actually advocating it). It reads to me like a nice way to justify prejudices of all kind & intolerance because hey! it's a natural human tendency! instead of wanting to evolve past it.

It's not a natural human tendency, its something that's hardwired into every mammal on the planet. Advance(towards what is familiar)/Retreat(away from the unfamiliar and, therefore, dangerous). If, for example, a wolf pup was born and DIDN'T remain close to the pack and DIDN'T naturally fear/run away from strange, dissimilar animals, it would likely be eaten by any number of predators.

Since mammals, except in special cases, do have this natural instinct, they are able to avoid dangerous situations by remaining with their own kind until they are old enough to fend for themselves. People, like other mammals, cannot defend themselves at an early age from predators. Obviously this is still something humans need to some extent, because there is still "danger" outside of the safety net of "family" which I like to think of as a smaller version of the tribe.

The simple fact that the other tribe looks different is enough to trigger the 'retreat' response, as would a strange environment, unknown sensations, etc. So, kid walks down street he knows, encounters someone of another color for the first time, the automatic response is to flee.

Obviously this is not only an instinct, but a reinforced instinct, which, as the years go by and more people are exposed to different tribes at earlier ages, will eventually weaken, just as any other antiquated survival instincts would. Unfortunately, these instincts will live on in other forms until 'races' become less distinct, borders disappear, a universal culture forms, etc, etc.

 

[angell_m]

I live in one of the most northern cities in Norway, with less than 70k people. There are no gangs up here. And if there were any, I would know about them. In Oslo it's different because it's over one million people living there. The only gangs in Norway (Oslo) are pakestanian and somalian gangs. You can't find any white "gangs". Bikers are p***ies, anyone can slap them around even highschool nerds. And the one and only nazi group up here (Vigrid) is more open minded than one of our political parties Fremskritspartiet (I vote for them, but it's mainly because their policy is "My freedom ends where your begins," it has nothing to do about racism, nazism or nationalism. I would have to explain a lot of things about this political party to make you understand but yeah... they're not racists/nazists/nationalists anyway).

 

[5231311252]

I don't really have a problem with colorists. Often times they're an interesting bunch and it's fun asking them questions about their views.

An example of my seemingly racist behavior: If I'm walking around downtown after sunset and I see a group of young black men hanging out on the sidewalk(especially in front of an alley) I will ALWAYS avoid them, either by walking across the street, changing directions or walking around a block through other side streets. This is not because I hate or despise blacks or because I think I am superior to them, but because blacks are much more violent than whites. I'm not afraid of being raped but I would like to avoid being beaten, robbed and/or murdered.

 

[LEGERdeMAIN]

Do you disagree?

 

[Halla74]

I thought a lot about this topic and responses. I think with me its particular situation, which i didnt state, it's more family/friends-issue than only rasistic.

They'll always be your family, but you don't always have to live there.

I live in apartment building, 7 floors, about 150 people in building. I live here from when i was 3 years old. When I was kid I was basically friends with most of my neighbors, and was attached to many, the same with my extended family. Most of those people are racists. I wasnt aware of that for like first 13 years of my life, so I liked them. I didnt have a clue what's happening. I still get surprised when I hear something like that about someone who I liked, when I hear the most friendly of my neighbors that I spent half of my childhood at his house, was walking around with gun and searching for Serbs to kill them. Seems like most people arent really normal. That's disturbing.

They hid their true nature from you when you were younger. "Spare the lambs the evil of our ways...until they are older and realize we are right" they probably though to themselves subconsciously. :rolli: Hypocrites. They've always pissed me off.

And this is why I am confused how to act, because I grew up now, and I cant go to what was before, but I cant totally ignore people I had connection with. I need to resolve this soon because it's underlying issue for many years. I find it hard to dismiss people as idiots.

At some point in your life, for your own preservation and sanity, and for the preservation of your self respect, you are going to need to learn how to carve sick, toxic people out of your life completely. Either tell them explicitly what your issue is with them, or just cease all contact with them. The type of person and the type of conflict you have with them is the determining factor as to which of the two techniques to use.

For people that are potentially violent, tell them less, in fact tell them nothing, they will use it against you. Just slowly cease your contact with them and change your schedule and move if you have to if it is that bad. Most people you can just tell them what your problem is with them, that you wish them well, but that you need space and do not wish to continue relations as you have in the past, as you are trying to accomplish your life goals, and need clarity of mind. Something like that. I have told people "Do not speak to me, do not call me, and do not ever look at me agin. Do you understand?" That usually gets the point across if you are really pissed.

A friend of mine is Serbian. He is from Yugoslavia. He is a carpenter. His brother was locked up for a year for participating in a civil rights march on the street. He said some people just end up "missing" and are never seen again. That is really fucked up. Have you ever considered moving? Like get a job with a company that operates in many different countries and just get the hell out of there? My Dad left his hometown because there was a crappy economy, and alot of the people were ignorant. He still visited his family, and still deos, but he left and made a good life for himself. Everyone has that option. If you are truly miserable in your environment, you will not thrive, you will not flourish, as you are not at peace with the world around you.

At any rate, I wish you the best of luck. Whenever there is contention and the possibility of violence, say less to people about your beliefs, and not more. Take care.

-Halla

 

[musicnerd93]

Luckily, I don't know too many racist people. (Or atleast nobody I know has acted racist around me.) The only racism I see around these parts is towards white people...

But, in any case, I just ignore them. If someone wants to be close minded about someone else's skin color that's for them to deal with.

 

[Nicodemus]

Maieutics.