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Your Chains

Mempy

Mamma said knock you out
Joined
Jul 29, 2007
Messages
2,227
Everyone's got their chains to break.

What are yours?

They can be a dependance on intimate relationships. Confidence issues. Lack of work ethic. Your parents. Abuse. Insecurity. Paranoia. Anxiety. Anything.

What have you always struggled to break free of, if anything?
 

spartan26

New member
Joined
Apr 29, 2007
Messages
189
MBTI Type
INTP
beating myself up. I've worked at overcoming the feeling I need to "earn" everything. There might be something saying I wouldn't deserve something until I could prove it to myself. Either I'm starting to feel like I've satisfied all my dues or I'm finally getting past this barrier.
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,187
MBTI Type
BELF
Enneagram
594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Expecting perfection of myself (always being the smartest, kindest, most sensitive, most perceptive, never acting out of anger, etc.) and then feeling ashamed of myself for not being that or not even wanting to be that any longer.

Also, not wanting other people to think poorly of me, whether fair or unfair.
 

INTJMom

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 28, 2007
Messages
5,413
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
Everyone's got their chains to break.

What are yours?

They can be a dependence on intimate relationships. Confidence issues. Lack of work ethic. Your parents. Abuse. Insecurity. Paranoia. Anxiety. Anything.

What have you always struggled to break free of, if anything?
I avoid my responsibilities by spending time on the computer. I should get up and tackle several months worth of work. I don't because it feels like it never ends. I feel like Cinderella slaving away all the time. Meanwhile, what I have done gets un-done as soon as my family walks in the door at the end of the day. It's a never-ending hamster wheel.

I have to learn to balance my life between work and relaxation. I have learned that if I set a timer, and I can stop working when the timer rings, I am more likely to be willing to expend the physical energy required.

It's the biggest struggle of my life. The big-picture is overwhelming. It paralyzes me.

I experienced some pretty good success last spring when I committed to clean the basement 4 days a week, 2 hours a day. It's not done yet. I took notes on the things I was learning - the way my thinking was changing and adjusting. I just have to re-commit to the project.
 

swordpath

New member
Joined
Oct 24, 2007
Messages
10,547
MBTI Type
ISTx
Enneagram
5w6
Fear of failure and rejection (one that is so strong I find it hard to make meaningful and intimate relationships)

anxiety

Procrastination and an inconsistency in motivation
 

Sandy

New member
Joined
Oct 10, 2007
Messages
552
MBTI Type
INFP
I avoid my responsibilities by spending time on the computer. I should get up and tackle several months worth of work. I don't because it feels like it never ends. I feel like Cinderella slaving away all the time. Meanwhile, what I have done gets un-done as soon as my family walks in the door at the end of the day. It's a never-ending hamster wheel.

I have to learn to balance my life between work and relaxation. I have learned that if I set a timer, and I can stop working when the timer rings, I am more likely to be willing to expend the physical energy required.

It's the biggest struggle of my life. The big-picture is overwhelming. It paralyzes me.

I experienced some pretty good success last spring when I committed to clean the basement 4 days a week, 2 hours a day. It's not done yet. I took notes on the things I was learning - the way my thinking was changing and adjusting. I just have to re-commit to the project.

I totally understand. I know what I have to do, but starting them is my biggest obstacle. :doh:
 

Sandy

New member
Joined
Oct 10, 2007
Messages
552
MBTI Type
INFP
Everyone's got their chains to break.

What are yours?

They can be a dependance on intimate relationships. Confidence issues. Lack of work ethic. Your parents. Abuse. Insecurity. Paranoia. Anxiety. Anything.

What have you always struggled to break free of, if anything?

Mine is a biggie - procrastination
 

Grayscale

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 20, 2007
Messages
1,965
MBTI Type
ISTP
Apathy... almost everything I have attempted I have been very good at, for me the delimiting factor has been deciding what I want to do and motivating myself to get started on it.
 

miss fortune

not to be trusted
Joined
Oct 4, 2007
Messages
20,589
Enneagram
827
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I need to start taking life seriously! :cry: my defense against things has always been to laugh and make it into a joke- which, while fun, probably isn't the best approach :(
 
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Nadir

Enigma
Joined
Dec 17, 2007
Messages
544
MBTI Type
INxJ
Enneagram
4
I need to find a way to unchain my mind. I can't say I feel intelligent enough at any given moment - I feel that there's something holding me back. There's also so much that I don't know.

And yeah, I get much procrastination done.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Pleading with God.
Comparing my life to "normal".
Disowning myself.
Looking back over my shoulder. Always.
 

Athenian200

Protocol Droid
Joined
Jul 1, 2007
Messages
8,828
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
Feeling chronically dissatisfied with things and people.

Not pushing myself to act when I need to, and working too hard for things that don't matter.
 

FDG

pathwise dependent
Joined
Aug 13, 2007
Messages
5,903
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
7w8
Some people say I don't take life seriously enough, I tell them it's just the way I outwardly behave because it feels better this way.

In any case I'm probably a bit insecure in romantic relationship. Since it's not big insecurity, I don't think it's something solvable...except this, I don't have any I think. I never felt like I had as a child, my parents didn't impose me anything I just always did what I wanted. The only little problem started when I had romantic relationships and that's the only thing in life that has given me some problems, probably (not many, though).
 

ptgatsby

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
4,476
MBTI Type
ISTP
I'd like to feel like an adult, finally. Or rather, I wish I could let go of wanting to be a kid.
 

cascadeco

New member
Joined
Oct 7, 2007
Messages
9,083
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
My chain? Oh, probably at the root it's not fully accepting who I am, off and on thinking something's 'wrong' with me (and therefore feeling I have to change something or other for others to like and accept me), and always comparing myself to others.
 

Nonpareil

New member
Joined
Jul 20, 2007
Messages
268
MBTI Type
INTJ
I was actually talking to pt about this, because I wasn't sure or aware of any chains that I had that I actually cared to break (in that sense). I have phobias and fears but none that hinder me to the point where I would consider it as something I need to break, if you know what I mean.

Anyways, pt pointed out a fear that I do have, that I don't even notice and I guess that I do have to face it and hopefully break myself of it.

It's funny for me, as a strong introvert, I am deadly afraid of being alone (I have huge abandonment issues). So, without going into a ton of details and explanations, that is the chain that I have and would like to break - fear of being alone.

Thanks :wubbie:
 

FallsPioneer

New member
Joined
Dec 21, 2007
Messages
260
MBTI Type
INTJ
I have a colossal fear of being/dying alone. I don't even think I'm going to be alone, ever, but somehow, if I think about it, I feel like crap.

I always try to make myself "better"-this is better in the sense of "more like the norm," because I feel like I've developed all of the loner, mega-thoughtful aspects of who I am and not the part that is friendly and all that. I mean, I genuinely am who I am every time I post, but I'm not sure when I'll be happy with myself, and stop trying to improve (improve as I see fit). I think I'm good, but I could be better. Somehow I think I want to be this totally spectacular three-dimensional person without faults. I tend to second guess everything I say, too. However, this typically happens on a bad day, otherwise I feel just fine...I'm learning to accept who I am still yet. The thought that I could possibly live with this anxiety is horrifying...but I attribute it mostly to being a moody teenager, at least, I hope so.

I'm great at overthinking, too.
 
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