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Online Behavior

Obfuscate

Permabanned
Joined
Aug 20, 2016
Messages
1,907
MBTI Type
iNtP
Enneagram
954
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
in person, i am much less likely to feel compelled to speak... online i am much more likely to talk to someone i do not know... i think i spend roughly equivalent time decieding what to say, but i use more words to do so online (on average)...
 

Chad of the OttomanEmpire

Give me a fourth dot.
Joined
Jun 9, 2013
Messages
1,053
MBTI Type
NeTi
Enneagram
478
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Of course I'm different. Not in the sense that I "put on a persona" online, as some on Personality Café tried to accuse each other of. Just that my "vibe" online isn't what you might get from me irl. This is true of most.

For one thing, I don't talk as much irl because I know no one wants to listen to me, whereas online I can have my say and people can just skip over it if they're so inclined.

I have no respect for all those internet warriors--who wouldn't dare say anything to your face--being total shitbags online. They're majorly responsible for the shift in American attitudes, polarization, and the way half of the US now dehumanizes the other half. They should be publicly flogged imo (yes, I'd say that to their faces, if I could find them).

For me, it's almost the exact opposite. People online seem to think I have unusual social grace and "know what to say and what not to say". I tell you, this is not true! Irl, I hardly ever know what to say to people. I'm blunt. I frequently put my foot in my mouth. I'm brutally honest. Online, it's like...I know people can't hear my tone of voice and I don't want to accidently hurt someone or piss them off, so I'm really polite and choose my words carefully when directly interacting with them. It's easy for me to perceive hostility, so I try to mitigate that so others don't feel I'm being hostile to them (unless of course I feel someone's being hostile to me). Etc. The keyboard acts as my filter, I don't have as much of one irl.
 

Introspector

New member
Joined
Nov 19, 2017
Messages
547
MBTI Type
ISTJ
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Unlike what most people seem to experience, I am much more friendly and courteous online than in real-life. I wish that I could explain why but I'm not quite sure myself.
 

Stigmata

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Feb 16, 2011
Messages
8,779
Behave differently? No, not really. I probably come across to others very quiet and withdrawn initially, yet once I get comfortable in the presence of those around me, I pretty much act the exact same as I would online.

In person, I find it easier to become engaged in topics I probably would normally avoid on the forum, simply because of the amount of effort expended to type versus just literally speaking what's on my mind.
 

Maou

Mythos
Joined
Jun 20, 2018
Messages
6,117
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I am drastically different. I am way more extroverted online. I dont have to pay attention to body language and tone. Makes me feel less anxious, on top of my speech problems. Im very reserved, sharp, and flat in reality.
 

cascadeco

New member
Joined
Oct 7, 2007
Messages
9,083
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
It's really important to me to be as 'real' as possible wherever I am; people thinking I'm a certain way on here when I'm not would mean I'm not doing a good job of being 'me' on here. So I'd like to think what you see on here is pretty much what you'd get irl; I try my utmost to be 'real' with my actual thoughts and feelings. The only difference I can think of, which applies to almost every introvert at least, is that it's way easier for me to explain my thoughts via writing than it is for me to do so verbally. As such I'm going to seem waaay more long-winded online than I ever am irl. That said, irl I'm much more apt to banter and chit chat (with coworkers for example), assuming I'm in a good mood. I don't really do that on here, as I'm not trying to build or keep up relationships on here.
 
Joined
May 19, 2017
Messages
5,100
I’m not me irl, but I play me on TV.

Seriously- yeah this is pretty much a window into my head. Scary isn’t it? It’s me. Except this is a more thought organized version. I could walk around for 20 minutes looking for my keys while I’m grasping them with white knuckled frustration. :doh: I’m just 97% more quiet irl because I don’t care enough to interact with 97% of people. Works for me.
 

Earl Grey

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 3, 2017
Messages
4,910
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
583
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Online in general, and not just in this forum, it's easier to be chattier and more 'energetic' online for me (it's less energy-consuming), so in real life I come across as generally more reserved, speaking formally, even more sparing with my thoughts or engagements with others.
 

rav3n

.
Joined
Aug 6, 2010
Messages
11,655
It's really important to me to be as 'real' as possible wherever I am; people thinking I'm a certain way on here when I'm not would mean I'm not doing a good job of being 'me' on here. So I'd like to think what you see on here is pretty much what you'd get irl; I try my utmost to be 'real' with my actual thoughts and feelings. The only difference I can think of, which applies to almost every introvert at least, is that it's way easier for me to explain my thoughts via writing than it is for me to do so verbally. As such I'm going to seem waaay more long-winded online than I ever am irl. That said, irl I'm much more apt to banter and chit chat (with coworkers for example), assuming I'm in a good mood. I don't really do that on here, as I'm not trying to build or keep up relationships on here.
For what it's worth if anything, from where I sit, you've succeeded since you strike me as real.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
Staff member
Joined
Apr 18, 2010
Messages
27,230
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Either strawberry or rutabaga works with this; it is a hornpipe.

 

The Cat

Just a Cat who hangs out at the Crossroads
Staff member
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
23,552
Yes and no, For a while I wasnt certain what this meant. Which was the real Jack? The Jack of fables online, or the Jack of knaves of the distant past? The Jack of all trades, I feel I'm supposed to be, In my time away, during the harrowing of irl in general I've started to realize. Yes. A jack for all seasons, and a Jack for all peoples, a Jack for no one... are indeed parts of who I've been and am; they're all real Jack's or as real as I've known how to be thus far. But every day forward is a day closer and further, towards the truth of myself, if such a thing can be said to exist for one such as I, and further from the fog of trying to be what it seems everyone wishes of me or me to be...you see? Such is life I reckon...
 

misfortuneteller

New member
Joined
Apr 4, 2015
Messages
578
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Of course I behave differently because people aren't brave enough to say half the things that they say behind anonymity irl.
 

Schrödinger's Name

Blessed With A Curse
Joined
Jul 20, 2019
Messages
1,693
Online I (almost) become extraverted. I'm more 'aggressive', blunt. I share my emotions and my thoughts. In some way I feel like I can connect more with people online, but at the same time I feel like they are not 'real'.
Also because it takes time for me to put things into words. IRL, I tend to forget stuff. Later on I'll be like 'fuck, I forgot to tell them this or that' and it annoys me, even though it's not even that important.

IRL I'm more reserved. But with the right people I can be playful, just joking around like I do on the internet.
I'm active on another (Dutch) forum too and I miss the interaction I had four/six years ago on another forum. The people there are more stiff, there isn't a lot of 'playful' and direct interaction (except for discussions, I think many people there hate me :')). When I was 13-17 I spend much time on a certain forum. I even bought a game because the people there played it. It really felt like a friendship, a close community. I don't think about it a lot but now I am thinking about it... I took it for granted, I didn't realize what I had back then (but that's a human thing I guess). A community, some sort of 'friends'. I spend a lot of time with them.
I hope I can ever find something like that again.

So IRL I'm more introverted. I always think what I can say, but I almost never speak. I don't know why. I'm fine, just thinking. Though I should think about the fact that people like it when you say something too. I suck at being productive IRL. Online I feel like I actually do something.

What's the same for me in IRL and online, I'll idealize people. On the first forum I joined I thought some people were very interesting. I would 'accidentally' post in the same topics they posted, 'like' the same bands/groups/people they liked even though I didn't know the band etc. I would interact with them when I could.
Another thing is that I don't add friends first online, I'll always wait for the other person to do so. IRL it's just the same. I am unsure if I can consider someone my friend unless I hear them say that they consider me a friend. Then, when talking about them to other people I will (most of the time) refer to them as a 'friend'. It's probably because deep down I am still insecure, I wouldn't want to add someone as a friend, or refer someone as a friend with the risk that they don't feel the same or think something like "What does that b**** think she is to add me as a friend".
 

rav3n

.
Joined
Aug 6, 2010
Messages
11,655
Similar, albeit less talkative IRL, more of a listener. As a generality, there has to be a reason or goal for me to talk which online provides since threads introduce topics for discussion.
 

Neal Caffreynated

Artist/Playboy/Traveller
Joined
Mar 26, 2017
Messages
2,368
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w2
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I don’t think I act really differently here than IRL... I guess it depends more on the people IRL (like I won’t act the same way with my college friends than with coworkers) and I tend to open up more here about what I think/how I feel than I usually do

Also I haven’t stolen anything from you guys here yet so maybe this place makes me become a better person :newwink:
 

The Cat

Just a Cat who hangs out at the Crossroads
Staff member
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
23,552
There is something of a disconnect for me. Currently the Stranger you would see with your eyes does not match the truth of who the Stranger is. It is a mask I was born with. I'm working on fixing that. But it's slow going.
 
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