Most sensitive=most callous

[Glycerine]

Thoughts...

 

[Oom]

I don't think that being sensitive means being callous. Sensitive people can also be very shy and forgiving. Not callous at all. I think being callous means being more sensitive though. All of the bad things have gotten to the callous person. That's how their sensitivity obviously shows.

 

[gromit]

Yeah, like Oom says... I don't think it's necessarily a 1:1 correlation, but I think that calloused people probably are really sensitive at the core and have built up those thick layers to protect themselves. I mean think of the imagery of the word itself: a callous is layers of skin that have formed where an area is repeatedly exposed to abrasions.

Someone told me once that a cynic is a passionate person who has been disappointed. I thought that was really fascinating and possibly quite true.

 

[Thursday]

/ thread

 

[Thalassa]

yep

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

If a person has an over-reliance on Ego without being able to incorporate the needs of others into their world view, then such people can hoard sensitivity in a way. It is almost like they take everyone else's natural allotment for it as well as their own.

To me degree of sensitivity or callousness is nearly a non-issue because it just a style. The problem comes when there is great assymetry between the two in the way one relates to self and other. If self is overly sensitive, but is callous to others, then they are a malfunctioning and destructive person. It is also true that being really callous towards self, but sensitive towards others can be dysfunctional and lead to needless suffering, although that second scenario can create more larger-scale benefits than the first one. The first scenario is like a Black Hole destined to collapse in on itself into nothingness and destruction that pulls a few more along with it. The callousness to self with heightened sensitivity to others is something like a supernova. It can create a beautiful wonder that will lead to new star birth one day, but the person will become completely burnt out and used up before it's over. It can also lead to complex suppressed kinds of anger and such.

 

[Glycerine]

Quite interesting. I agree with everything being said. I was thinking about this earlier because most of the people that I've known that are callous seem to be extremely sensitive deep down like life let them down. Like what Toonia said, it might just be an ineffective and destructive coping mechanism.

 

[Halla74]

People who get used to operating with "layers of shielding" intended to prevent them from experiencing anything outside their comfort zone will perform very poorly once they are forced to hatch out of their shell, potentially making them more callous. It's a downward spiral.

I think alot of conditions that limit human life for long periods of time (anxiety, negativity, cynicism, etc.) result as a means of people not effectively dealing with past pain, hardships, faliures, etc. Everyone goes through this at some point in their lives, but at some point you must decide if you wish for bad moments of the past to limit the rest of your future. Only then will the courage to grow past the callouses be found and determined to be of merit.

 

[ColonelGadaafi]

The overall views in this thread is that callousness is supposedly a negative consequence of a negative event, which it is not neccesarily true at all. I have been called calloused before by people, for failing to accomodate other's people's sentiment at an event.

But callousness is not neccesarily something bad at all, i find that it allows me to make proper value judgement's in different context's.

 

[Arclight]

There might be something to this..

Certainly the most sensitive person I have ever known has also proven to be one of the most callous.

 

[MiasmaResonance]

It's due to a lack of emotional intelligence, that this downward spiral occurs. To be released from this state, an effort must be made, and to the type of person who feels no need to change..this is nearly impossible. It's best not to help these people. They need to help themselves.

 

[milkyway2]

It's such a paradox.

It always seems like when I'm trying to be the nicest I hurt people the most. I am super sensitive sometimes but honestly I can also be extremely callous.

 

[Little_Sticks]

What does it mean to be callous? I can imagine people becoming callous through great abuse and maybe even sociopaths and psychopaths being considered callous, but I'm not sure how I would imagine that in someone in real life.

Also, I just want to say, in case someone misinterprets, not showing any emotion is different from not actually feeling any. And the definition of the word only includes not feeling any emotion to be callous. So what are we/you/whomever considering callous? I think people who are good with Fe have an advantage in life, but I don't equate callousness with lack of Fe, but with lack of Fi, if functions are desired to use in the discussion.

 

[Lark]

Thoughts...

There's some pretty sensitive people here posting about the Pope.

 

[gromit]

The overall views in this thread is that callousness is supposedly a negative consequence of a negative event, which it is not neccesarily true at all. I have been called calloused before by people, for failing to accomodate other's people's sentiment at an event.

But callousness is not neccesarily something bad at all, i find that it allows me to make proper value judgement's in different context's.

Well, I think that is the general connotation of the word. Calloused = hardened, in a bad way. But I don't think bad experiences, disillusionment, disappointment must necessarily harden us in a way that impedes future growth. They can give us strength and courage, if we let them, like you say, and if they are not soooo overwhelming that they damage us permanently. Can we be damaged permanently? I don't know. I certainly have never experienced anything that would damage me permanently, but I definitely don't want to rule out the experiences of other people (torture victims or something really extreme and horrific like that).

I have had experiences which have altered me permanently, but I always at least try to keep myself open...

 

[Glycerine]

There's some pretty sensitive people here posting about the Pope.

Whoa, I can't believe you went there but still funny in the least.

 

[thisGuy]

I think it comes down to maturity

 

[Glycerine]

I think it comes down to maturity

How about those jaded 40 + year old types? Are they immature?

 

[thisGuy]

How about those jaded 40 + year old types? Are they immature?

I find that people are usually un-receiving of certain viewpoints cuz they are fail to take all the factors into account.

that or yeah, they are immature. immature in the sense that they give up in spite of the fact that only they have the power to change themselves

 

[FDG]

I think the causal relationship works like this: the probability of being very sensitive given that you're callous are near 1, but the probability of being callous given that you're really sensitive isn't significantly different from the probability of being nice.