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  1. #11
    loopy Ulaes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009


    i suspect assertiveness is something you can obtain by practise and by becoming consciously aware of it.
    really, it's the best way to deal with people.

  2. #12
    Playnerd Timeless's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009


    The way I see it:

    Assertiveness is like laying down a road, while aggression is just a crazy driver on the road.

  3. #13
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2009


    I'm unsure that assertiveness isnt just one of those things people use to berate one another, people can be assertive in different ways and suggestions that people arent assertive are often "why arent you like me?" or "why cant you do things like me?" in disguise. Similarly it can mean "why cant you do things for me?" when it is a person in responsibility and authority pass the buck for managing people or a situation off to someone else.

    I've reached those conclusions because when I ask people to define assertiveness they seldom can, I've been told a couple of times that I'm not assertive or need to be more assertive and as a result have given the concept a long hard look, generally its about asking for what you want without aggression. Well doesnt everyone do that? I cant imagine that anyone other than the most timerous would really relent, relent, relent until they can take it no more and explode in a fit of aggressiveness.
    All for ourselves, and nothing for other people, seems, in every age of the world, to have been the vile maxim of the masters of mankind.
    Chapter IV, p. 448. - Adam Smith, Book 3, The Wealth of Nations

    whether or not you credit psychoanalysis itself, the fact remains that we all must, to the greatest extent possible, understand one another's minds as our own; the very survival of humanity has always depended on it. - Open Culture

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