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  1. #11
    A Benign Tumor PoprocksAndCoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Santtu View Post
    Hmm. So I didn't get it right. What is your idea of bad feelings & dark moods then? What kind of a part they play in your life? What's your thought of them in general?
    They help me write good stories!

    If we lost our bad feelings and dark moods, we would be airheads. Not even human. People should strive for happiness, but appreciate the little worrywart who's your conscience's brother in the back of your mind.
    "In order for the light to shine so brightly, the darkness must be present." -Francis Bacon

    "No matter how dark the moment, love and hope are always possible." -George Chakiris

  2. #12
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PoprocksAndCoke View Post
    They help me write good stories!

    If we lost our bad feelings and dark moods, we would be airheads. Not even human. People should strive for happiness, but appreciate the little worrywart who's your conscience's brother in the back of your mind.
    I got that kind of mood from your answers, but I was too wordy to express it. Thanks. I think I almost 100% agree to what you just said. Or, perhaps you're just too good of a writer to make your readers agree to things
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  3. #13
    You're fired. Lol. Antimony's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. 5
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. 3
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. 2
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group. 4
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. -10
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me. -10
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 5, but not because I am human
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. 5
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems. 2, I don't not complain to avoid spoiling my mood.
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. 3
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. 3.5
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. 5
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about. 2
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth. 1
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas. 4
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. 2
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. 2
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. 2
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life. 1
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. 4
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. 2
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. 2. I like to do something with my life (I need to feel successful or accomplished to be happy. I can't just exist).
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. 4
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. 3. It depends. Only to some people.
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. 2
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively. 2
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. 3.75. I like to argue debate with other people, so some may perceive that as 'hard to get along with'
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. 1
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. 5
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. -100
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  4. #14
    Senior Member compulsiverambler's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. 4
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. 4
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. 2
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group. 4
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. 2
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me. 3
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 5 As Antimony points out, that's not strictly speaking the reason.
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. 4
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems. 4
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. 4
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. 4
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. 3
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about. 2
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth. 2
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas. 5
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. 1 Doesn't help anyone. You can be sensitive and helpful and still upbeat. I prefer that by far, helps cheer me up.
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. 2
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. 1
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life. 3
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. 4
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. 1
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. 3
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. 4
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. 2
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. 3
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively.
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. 4
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. 5
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. 4
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. If you mean I have people in my life who help me, 4

    With the threes, it depends entirely on the period of my life we're talking about. There's been no consistent trend.

  5. #15
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    So, in general I'm reading an acceptance for a wide range of feelings from bad to good, with people generally trying not to be of too much trouble to everyone else. People seem to think of relationships as reciprocal, give and take.

    What surprised me, none of the people who answered generally see happiness as "shallow".

    These responses generally give a feeling of equality, meaning, they reflect the general theme of "do unto others as you would like others to do to you". Or something of the kind.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  6. #16
    Senior Member proximo's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving
    the problems.
    5 - absolutely. I give sympathy and validation to others who confide their stuff in me, but it's with a sense of bafflement because although I've learned to recognise when people want it, I can't imagine myself finding a use for it. When something's wrong, my sole interest is in making it right or adapting in some way to make things cool again. People saying "there, there" to me is just useless and irritating.
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. 3 - I'm trying to improve it, but not urgently
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. 4 - not usually nastily though, but often ruthlessly if they're not around and I know it won't get back to them, if I think their "problems" are ridiculous or the result of ridiculous aspects of their personality
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group.4
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. 2 - "fair" doesn't mean "I get what I want with the same frequency as other people I know"
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me.1 - some bad shit happens and has happened to me, but it doesn't get me down. It's just challenges I've got to man up to and each one teaches me something.
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 5
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. 5
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems.4
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. 4 - but that doesn't mean they should be expected to take on those problems themselves.
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. 5
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. 5
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about.3 - I relate to most of what most people talk about, simply because I've had an extremely varied life experience and a very chequered past, so I've been in most people's shoes and if I haven't, I've enough imagination to see their POV. I don't relate to what someone says just cos they're happy, or not relate just cos they're not. But the WAY in which they talk about it might be something I find either enjoyable, frustrating or irritating.
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth.1 - in fact, I find people who are permanently down to be very self-absorbed
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas.3 - I can consider and discuss them and enjoy the discussion, because I'm detached from them and don't "take them on" or end up dwelling on them
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. 1
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. 3 I laugh if I feel like laughing, and I never cry - ever.
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. 3 - I do sometimes joke about other people's problems, but in a good-natured way usually, aimed at cheering them up
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life.4 - usually for simple practical and financial reasons, that whole poverty trap thing, but it doesn't grind me down and I don't see myself as "cursed" or particularly unfortunate.
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. 4
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. 2 - they occur to me, but not for long and they don't get me down much
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. I do have a happy, carefree disposition, but it's not from my life being easy - it's never been easy! I've just found other things to look for than an easy life, which make me happy.
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. 5 - I put them aside most of the time, habitually. It's harder for me to NOT put them aside than to do so.
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. 2 - depends how bad or bad in what way. Bureaucratic bullshit and stuff like that, I'll have a quick rant and make it amusing if I can, then forget about it. Personal stuff, no, I don't talk about it except to my closest friends and then only when we're drunk, and I still laugh about it and make it funny and okay for them to as well.
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. 1 - my mood is a result of the way I choose to respond to the things that happen to me, it's my responsibility. You can take the same event and put five different people thru it and they'll all respond in different ways. It's not the event, it's the person.
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively. I don't even know what this means.
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. Most people say I am, I've been selected for roles and jobs on that basis specifically.
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. 2 - I sometimes get a feeling that I might've out-stayed my welcome, but I think everyone does and I don't wallow in it. Most of the time I'm aware that people are with me because they choose to be, and I leave it up to them to decide whether I'm a "burden" or not.
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. 3 - I like to be accepted for who I am, but I don't expect that to mean people let me get away with bad behaviour because it's "who I am". I'm concerned to improve "who I am" in light of feedback from others.
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. 2 - Other people are there for reasons of their own, as am I. It doesn't matter what those reasons are - if we get along, we get along *shrug* I'm aware usually of which of my problems can be solved through others' support and which can't, and when and from whom it's appropriate to ask for that support and when it's not.

    Incidentally Santtu, it sounds to me from these questions that you're dealing with a bit of an emotional vampire, who's taking advantage of your open mind and self-doubt. I've been there... ugh!
    I'm male and over 30, FYI.
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  7. #17
    Senior Member The Outsider's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. 2
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. 2
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. 1
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group. 1 - Haha. People should to whatever they please.
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. 2
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me. 3
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 3
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. 3
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems. 5 - I don't think about the group mood, but I just don't share my problems.
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. 2 - I don't know. Love is something else to me.
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. 2 - People should learn not to care about what other say, because they can say whatever they like, whining about it won't change it.
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. 4
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about. 2
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth. 1 - It may very well be the other way around. In fact, it usually seems to be the case.
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas. 5
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. 1
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. 2
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. 4
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life. 2
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. 4
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. 4
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. 2
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. 2
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. 1 - Others don't need to know.
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. 4
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively. 5
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. 2
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. 1
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. 5
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. 1

  8. #18
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    I got excited from your responses, proximo, thinking.. you're much like me, you are a solid, independent person who has a sensible idea of feelings, but prefers not to be tied down by pity, depression and such. You're ready to help someone who's having hard time, you're partly having hard time yourself, and you take responsibility.

    Your idea of emotional vampire.. that's an aspect I'm studying, not that much that I'd say that's what it is.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Santtu View Post
    One part of this, I'm trying to understand.

    Sky_is_blue, one word that seems to describe you, judging from your answers, is genuine. You live your life with no pretense, and you engage yourself fully. You seem to think that people should work together for a good mood, but darker, depressive moods should be preferably dealt with a very close person.
    You don't seem overly thrilled with life, but you are happy and content. You seem to value feelings for what they are. Still, you place a higher value for good feelings, and I get from your responses the idea that there are good feelings and bad feelings - those that do more good most often the time, and those that do less good.
    I think respect is an important value to you.
    Your responses seem to strongly indicate a wish to express such feelings which are the most useful for a group's well-being, with well-being linked to being positive, for the most part.
    Did I get anything right?
    Ooh...a free psychoanalysis. Win! I think you got everything right, I have nothing more substantial to add to this. I'm impressed and feeling slightly exposed. Thank you! Oh, I'll throw in a as well.

  10. #20
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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