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Attention whoring

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
All input is, once again appreciated, though I'm particularly interested in that of ENTPs.

Alright, let's hear it. I want definitions. I want reason as to why it annoys you, and how. Also, whether you ever consider that your own emotional bagage may colour your perceptions on this and how they would do that. And if you would be aware if you attention whored as well. And if so, why yours is acceptable and others isnt. Is it because it's a different type of attention whoring that's less annoying? For that matter, I want different types of attentionwhoring, which one is more annoying, etc etc. Pretty please :D

One example to get you started:

I heard someone say once:

"People who dance, and actively learn how to dance do so to show it off and attention whore. That's what I think when I see them cruising the dance floor."
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
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9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Got no problems with people who attention whore, it's more about what kind of quality they bring, if they're funny, entertaining, aware of their impact on others and so on then I'm all for it, I like being entertained, I like seeing people have fun. Otherwise it can get annoying, particularly if they have no concern for the impact they have on others.

Online I find it annoying if a response is demanded, the 'whinyness' of a person's whoring is what bothers me the most, if someone get's attention because people are interested in them, then great, if they get it by complaining that no one is giving them attention it shits me. Online I can be called an attention whore fo' sure, I like, even need feedback from others.

Irl I find it annoying when people use disparaging humour to get attention, put others down or are generally arrogant and ignorant to those around them, like they're welcome there so long as they give them the kind of attention they would give a deity, short of that I couldn't care less. Irl I'm not an attention whore, I can handle attention but can go without and often prefer to. Someone dancing retardedly in the middle of a dance floor will prolly make me giggle, I love when people let go and just don't care how stupid they look, dancing is about having fun, not looking good.

Those who look for attention because they like gathering people around and having fun and think life should be one huge party are cool by me.
 

tinkerbell

New member
Joined
Aug 31, 2008
Messages
3,487
MBTI Type
ENTP
Total attention whore at times (but not when I'm busy)....

FLASH TITS :D

Yes i'm aware of it, underneth it all it's pretty F really its looking for approval/affirmation in a T way...

I don't want to be seen as a pretty girl (which it decorative), I want to be seen as someone who is bright and can contributed etc...
 

Kra

Black Magic Buzzard
Joined
Jun 24, 2009
Messages
912
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
4w5
Vying for attention, in and of itself, doesn't bother me. It's how someone is doing it that may or may not bother me.

For instance, innocently bringing something that you did to everyone's attention does not bother me. I may ignore it, but it doesn't bother me at least.

On the other hand, I've dealt with people that have this bad habit of bringing other people's faults into light, in order to bring attention to their "awesomeness." I have a friend that used to do this, and it took nearly all of his long-time friends (myself included) black-listing him for a couple of weeks for him to finally realize that no one worth spending time with is appreciative of that behavior.

Edit: Basically, what Trinity said. :D
 

Jaguar

Active member
Joined
May 5, 2007
Messages
20,647
"People who dance, and actively learn how to dance do so to show it off and attention whore. That's what I think when I see them cruising the dance floor."

Talk about projection issues. Jesus.

That quote is by an insecure person who doesn't realize people dance because they love to dance.
It's a form of creative expression, no different than painting or singing.

The fact they interpret it as being an "attention whore" is their way of covering up for the fact they feel inferior, since they have no ability to dance.
Nor can they see the joy dancing gives to people.

What will that person say next-- all the guys on a football field are "attention whores" because they are engaging in a sport they enjoy?
Tell the person to get psychological help.
 

NewEra

New member
Joined
Dec 21, 2008
Messages
3,104
MBTI Type
I
Attention whoring can be pretty amusing on the Internet. In real life, it can be annoying. I'm not an attention whore, at least I try not to be.
 

Spamtar

Ghost Monkey Soul
Joined
Sep 1, 2009
Messages
4,468
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
Got no problems with people who attention whore, it's more about what kind of quality they bring, if they're funny, entertaining, aware of their impact on others and so on then I'm all for it, I like being entertained, I like seeing people have fun. Otherwise it can get annoying, particularly if they have no concern for the impact they have on others.

Online I find it annoying if a response is demanded, the 'whinyness' of a person's whoring is what bothers me the most, if someone get's attention because people are interested in them, then great, if they get it by complaining that no one is giving them attention it shits me. Online I can be called an attention whore fo' sure, I like, even need feedback from others.

Agree, it is not so much the attention whore issue I find repugnant but how it is done. Positive or clever is the best kind. Strictly negative confrontational and humor that is less clever and more “smarmy” is off-putting. As attention whores who overreact (particularly when they think they are justified in doing), are vulgar, are brutish, over moralizing, bullying, or just a beating a dead horse till its dead/windbags.

On line I can see occasionally saying something confrontational and the other side getting their back but when it continues into other threads that you two happen to share on some neutral subject is lame. On line you can’t take the difference outside and handle it like men so it makes the flaming troll attention whore even more annoying.
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
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ENFP
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Got no problems with people who attention whore, it's more about what kind of quality they bring, if they're funny, entertaining, aware of their impact on others and so on then I'm all for it, I like being entertained, I like seeing people have fun. Otherwise it can get annoying, particularly if they have no concern for the impact they have on others.

Online I find it annoying if a response is demanded, the 'whinyness' of a person's whoring is what bothers me the most, if someone get's attention because people are interested in them, then great, if they get it by complaining that no one is giving them attention it shits me. Online I can be called an attention whore fo' sure, I like, even need feedback from others.

Irl I find it annoying when people use disparaging humour to get attention, put others down or are generally arrogant and ignorant to those around them, like they're welcome there so long as they give them the kind of attention they would give a deity, short of that I couldn't care less. Irl I'm not an attention whore, I can handle attention but can go without and often prefer to. Someone dancing retardedly in the middle of a dance floor will prolly make me giggle, I love when people let go and just don't care how stupid they look, dancing is about having fun, not looking good.

Those who look for attention because they like gathering people around and having fun and think life should be one huge party are cool by me.

totally the way i see it too. as long as your cool and funny it's fine by me....otherwise shut the hell up please you're distracting me.
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
I can be an attention whore at times, probably more so on the internet then real life. But I can't say it doesn't bothers me sometimes, if I'm in a whoring mood but that's just because more attention is being paid to the other person and i get jealous. Most of the time I look at the other person and shrug. or go ok, or yup, or that's nice. Sometimes I love being the center of attention other times I don't want anyone know I exist and it usually varies between those extremes.

and on dancing I don't think dancing is neccesairly done for attention whoring. I like to dance I can't dance I sometimes dance when I'm home by myself I sometimes even sing the doom song[YOUTUBE="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDZpxvz0eGo"]Doom song[/YOUTUBE] when I'm home by myself and sometimes when I'm with others, who promptly tell me to shut up.
 

Oom

Your time is gonna come.
Joined
Mar 29, 2009
Messages
510
MBTI Type
IsfP
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5w4
Attention whoring isn't all that bad. Sometimes it's just hard to get people to talk about you for once!
 

Geoff

Lallygag Moderator
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
5,584
MBTI Type
INXP
Insecurity, attention seeking. if insecure, feel that extra attention is needed to feel like one is whole. So, whoring... is excessive seeking of attention merely because that attention is needed to feel secure.

I don't mind it, if not overdone. And if there is SOME point to the attention seeking over and above needing it.
 

onemoretime

Dreaming the life
Joined
Jun 29, 2009
Messages
4,455
MBTI Type
3h50
I think the disdain can best be summed up in three words: "Get over yourself". Why in those circumstances does your personal need for validation outweigh the group's interest?

I'm aware that I bring attention to myself excessively at times, but usually it's in pursuit of an exterior objective. The idea that I have to keep my mouth shut, even when I know the answer, because other people are annoyed by the "know it all" is something I'm still getting comfortable with, but I don't think I'll ever be used two, for a couple of reasons. First, isn't it more important that the problem be solved, the question answered, the knowledge unearthed, for all of our sake? Second, you think its comfortable for me to sit there in awkwardness as the room sits silently unable to answer? How does that make all of us look?
 

yenom

Alexander the Terrible
Joined
Aug 3, 2008
Messages
1,755
The whole purpose of the internet forum is built on the foundation of attention whoring.
Put it in light of the fact, it is about the freedom of self-expression.

My purpose here though is not attention whoring, I am here to investigate and see people's responses to my opinions.
 

Fluffywolf

Nips away your dignity
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Mar 31, 2009
Messages
9,581
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9
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I'm 'attention whoring' on forums in order to get the most feedback and have a good time.

I'd be bored with the place if I didn't do that, and what could I possibly be doing then? Working? Actually working? *shivers*
 

Liminality

New member
Joined
Aug 29, 2009
Messages
217
MBTI Type
ISFx
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6w7
Serious fishing for compliments (by putting yourself down), when it's obviously someone fishing for complements, is the type that gets to me, other than that I'm not really bothered.

EDIT: I guess it annoys me beacause often they're better than quite alot of others in the aspect they put themself down. Like myfriend who was all 'Sorry about my hideous scrawl' (about hand writing), when she's got possibly the easiest handwriting to read, and it's not even something to appologise for.

Personally I'm guilty of needing attention from authority figures (being teacher's pet - Kinda Hermiony Granger style), particularly those in creative subjects, I only noticed it a few days ago, creepily. It's kind've (really) weird, spending years not noticing how desperate you are for a particular sort of person's attention and approval.
 

Valuable_Money

New member
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
679
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
5w6
attentionwhore.jpg
 

Skyward

Badoom~
Joined
Jul 3, 2008
Messages
1,084
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infj
Enneagram
9w1
The only ETPs I knew for a long time were annoying attention whores. Meeting a couple 'good versions' of these types really help me correct my view of them. The good ENTP was a Bostonian, and the good ESTP was a Swiss exchange student.

The attention whoring of an ESTP is really, trying to sell a person on their perspective and being quite forward with it. It may not be bad for other types but for my INFJ-ness it is really irritating since I can already see he perspective, but don't find it any better than perspective B or C. Thankfully he was a pretty cool guy besides that. But he had eyes for the INFj i liked so he WAS the enemy!

The ENTP did similar, but he would be more sly with his arguments and sometimes just go into absurd territory to defend his argument. The only time he would stop is if you said something he thought was so incredibly stupid or stubborn that he would deem you 'inflexibly retarded.' Reall, I think the whole thing was so my attention would be fixed on him. He would also debate with the teacher during class about the most trivial things. If I call him out on it I become an enemy.
 
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