when functions fight (kwa-bam!!)

[sculpting]

So as I have laerned about the functions I have noticed some combinations pari very poorly together.

For me for instance:

A dominant Fe and my secondary Fi don't always agree and can rub each other the wrong way (even though I very much value the ENFJs and ESFJs I am around as they can be awesome both personally and organizationally-just not as very close friends normally. I make them twitch.)

Another example is when I am stressed I start using tertairy Te to control things. If I am around ENTPs and they start using thier tertiary Fe, profound disgreements can occur as I attempt to control and dominate and they become emotive to get out from under my attempts at control. My very worst fights w my Best Freind ENTP have come from this area and before the functions I could never figure out why.

So question: Have you come across combinations of functions that seem to be harder for you to work than others? Do certain combinations inherently clash?

 

[simulatedworld]

Seems like opposites would probably clash most. I remember being at a party once with a big group of pretty diverse types sitting around talking, and this INFP girl hadn't said a single word or made any attempt to communicate even once, but after she got up and left for a minute, the ESTJ girl among us made a point to say that "she seemed kind of bitchy."

I don't even know how to explain that functionally, but surely having someone's inferior function as your dominant (and vice versa) can cause some of the nastiest interpersonal friction.

 

[Glycerine]

My dominant Ni gets on the nerves of most of the SJs I know IRL and there is usually friction. My ESFJ dad (auxilliary Si) gets very impatient w/ me most of the time. He likes things to be A, B, then C while I go from A straight to G in like a minute. I usually get along with Fi, Te, and Ne users. It just sucks that I tend to clash with Si users.

 

[TaylorS]

I tend to have trouble with Te dominants (ETJs) when their Te starts running roughshod over other people's feelings and opinions. An example is that I work with people with mental health issues, one person in particular is a wonderful, kind, and friendly young ESFP woman named Tara. I'm constantly getting ticked of by my ESTJ boss who dismisses her issues and complaints as "obviously attention-seeking behavior, it's in her file right here..." and I feel like screaming "quit treating her merely as a walking mental health problem and treat her like a HUMAN BEING you tyrannical, cold-hearted B*TCH!!!".

 

[sculpting]

I tend to have trouble with Te dominants (ETJs) when their Te starts running roughshod over other people's feelings and opinions. An example is that I work with people with mental health issues, one person in particular is a wonderful, kind, and friendly young ESFP woman named Tara. I'm constantly getting ticked of by my ESTJ boss who dismisses her issues and complaints as "obviously attention-seeking behavior, it's in her file right here..." and I feel like screaming "quit treating her merely as a walking mental health problem and treat her like a HUMAN BEING you tyrannical, cold-hearted B*TCH!!!".

That's interesting. My boss is an ESTJ and I have to move to a very strong Ne-Te level to work with her. She moves to a strong Te-Ne level to work with me. We both have to step away from our "base" funtions to get anything accomplished. She is about 55, so i think twenty years ago I could not have worked for her as she would not have been able to do this.

She is crazy political, but does not bother me-ever. She leaves me alone and trusts my competency, doesn't question me, and lets me work, even though she doesn't "get" me at all.

She is the most manipulative political creature I have ever met in the five years I have been in the corporate world, but more clever than most ESTJs as well. If she would lose the politics she could be a very good VP level executive.

Is your boss actually allowed to comment on someone else's personnel file? I'd throw Te-Si right back at her ass and point out the inapproriateness of her actions from a regulatory/HR perspective. Also point of the medical basis of the problems and point towards discrimination based upon illnesses potentially.

Its awesome of you to stick up for her.

 

[01011010]

I tend to have trouble with Te dominants (ETJs) when their Te starts running roughshod over other people's feelings and opinions. An example is that I work with people with mental health issues, one person in particular is a wonderful, kind, and friendly young ESFP woman named Tara. I'm constantly getting ticked of by my ESTJ boss who dismisses her issues and complaints as "obviously attention-seeking behavior, it's in her file right here..." and I feel like screaming "quit treating her merely as a walking mental health problem and treat her like a HUMAN BEING you tyrannical, cold-hearted B*TCH!!!".

I'd think the same as your boss. Weak people are annoying. Whether it's genetics, chemical imbalances, or harsh life experiences. Survival of the fittest. Period.

 

[Quinlan]

I'd think the same as your boss. Weak people are annoying. Whether it's genetics, chemical imbalances, or harsh life experiences. Survival of the fittest. Period.

Wow. Do you annoy yourself? ...and how is survival of the fittest, relevant to that situation?

I also feel uncomfortable when strong (strong as in, untempered by the other functions) Te thinking is applied to people, it just doesn't seem right.

 

[TaylorS]

I'd think the same as your boss. Weak people are annoying. Whether it's genetics, chemical imbalances, or harsh life experiences. Survival of the fittest. Period.

Well FU, too. :steam:

 

[Jaguar]

I'd think the same as your boss. Weak people are annoying. Whether it's genetics, chemical imbalances, or harsh life experiences. Survival of the fittest. Period.

The truly strong protect the weak, dickhead.

 

[garbage]

I'd think the same as your boss. Weak people are annoying. Whether it's genetics, chemical imbalances, or harsh life experiences. Survival of the fittest. Period.

So, wait.. if you had that job in the mental health industry, you'd just call your patients weak, leave them to fend for themselves, and call it a day?

Man. Easiest job ever.

 

[Costrin]

Wow. Do you annoy yourself? ...and how is survival of the fittest, relevant to that situation?

I also feel uncomfortable when strong (strong as in, untempered by the other functions) Te thinking is applied to people, it just doesn't seem right.

Well FU, too. :steam:

The truly strong protect the weak, dickhead.

So, wait.. if you had that job in the mental health industry, you'd just call your patients weak, leave them to fend for themselves, and call it a day?

Man. Easiest job ever.

Wow guys. Way to misinterpret.

Or possibly I'm the one misinterpreting...

 

[wolfy]

Wow guys. Way to misinterpret.

Or possibly I'm the one misinterpreting...

What's to misinterpret? I thought they were right.

 

[Rangler]

I'd think the same as your boss. Weak people are annoying. Whether it's genetics, chemical imbalances, or harsh life experiences. Survival of the fittest. Period.

This is a bullshit attitude and quite possibly the least intelligent thing you've wrote.

 

[527468]

Hmm... function clashes. From what I've noticed there's a pattern for internal clash (meaning between two + people, but kept to self).


Internally I'd say:

Introverted functions can usually clash with anything.

Extroverted functions seem to clash with their introverted counterpart.


Externally I'd say (when there is physically a bigger problem going on):

Fe clashes with Fi
Si clashes with Ni/Ne/Se
Ti/Fi clashes with anything
Fi/Fe can clash with Ti/Te

P functions don't really clash with J functions. There's more of a compliment.

 

[Jaguar]

Wow guys. Way to misinterpret.

Or possibly I'm the one misinterpreting...

You can't misinterpret something that requires no interpretation.
The person's comments were straightforward.

 

[Jaguar]

My dominant Ni gets on the nerves of most of the SJs I know IRL and there is usually friction. My ESFJ dad (auxilliary Si) gets very impatient w/ me most of the time. He likes things to be A, B, then C while I go from A straight to G in like a minute. I usually get along with Fi, Te, and Ne users. It just sucks that I tend to clash with Si users.

If you can go from A to G in a minute, I'll add you to my buddy list.
Yesterday I was dealing with a complete nutjob so devoid of Ni,
everything I said went right over her head.

Ever see the movie Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid?
My fav line:

"I've got vision and the rest of the world wears bifocals"

 

[sculpting]

I'd think the same as your boss. Weak people are annoying. Whether it's genetics, chemical imbalances, or harsh life experiences. Survival of the fittest. Period.

Wow. Do you annoy yourself? ...and how is survival of the fittest, relevant to that situation?

I also feel uncomfortable when strong (strong as in, untempered by the other functions) Te thinking is applied to people, it just doesn't seem right.

Binary, on some level, this is pretty harsh but I think it is does give a good idea how how dominant Te sees situations sometimes. It has a mission to accomplish and has no time for inefficiency (or mispellings). I have a hefty Te that gets to come out and be cut the shit sometimes. This Te heavy approach, while painful on an individuual level, can increase benefits across organizations by cutting through bullshit. So Perhaps Te and Fi are fucntions that fight No wonder I keep argueing with myself.

Hmm... function clashes. From what I've noticed there's a pattern for internal clash (meaning between two + people, but kept to self).


Internally I'd say:

Introverted functions can usually clash with anything.

Extroverted functions seem to clash with their introverted counterpart.


Externally I'd say (when there is physically a bigger problem going on):

Fe clashes with Fi
Si clashes with Ni/Ne/Se
Ti/Fi clashes with anything
Fi/Fe can clash with Ti/Te

P functions don't really clash with J functions. There's more of a compliment.

Merciful lemon what about Te-Fe? why would Fi/Ti clash with anything? expound por favor.

 

[entropie]

Dominant Te's are able and tend to confuse me in many ways. Secondary Te's on the other hand, dont; at least not on purpose..

There was that rude guy lately (who was exceptionally dumb for a marketing person), who escorted three customers with me to two possible locations to show them halls, where they were planning to have an event in. I was the driver and when we started our trip in the car that marketing guy yelled at me not to drive the way I intended to, totally brought me out of the concept and made me feel lost + insecure. He didnt want that I drive nearby the red light district, cause the customers werent from our town.

Thats perfectly understandable, but it defied logic. Cause to be able to reach the second location, we were destinied to drive by the red light district, cause the highway was jammed and therefore, if we drive by it in the first or second place was totally irrelevant. One still can say, ok at least we only have to drive one time by the district, if we took his route, but then again those customers wanted to use my complete hometown for their project and present their customers our town as a location for geothermics. They were more intrested in the second hall in the first place, cause the location is way cooler than the first one and so ultimatively someone had to tell them that its next to the red light district. Otherwise it would look like, we as ambassadors for the town had left crucial things out in the business talks, which eventually could cost us our jobs.

But well I did it his way and things got worse. The management guy called his secretary on the way, who delegated a project she should work on, to another person. He started to yell at her (!) in the car in front of the customers. I was somewhat ashamed. Later when we dropped the marketing guy and I drove the passengers alone to a restaurant, I wanted to lighten the mood a bit and I hope I succeeded.

Its kinda strange sometimes, how some people see the world. I dont know, I think this guy was an ENTJ and a very rude one at that. Wasnt just the right way to treat customers.

I on the other hand was intimitated by his Te and thats a trick that does work far too often on me. For the future, I myself have to be more sure in my own reasoning skills and maybe develop a mindset of myself with a set of answers, I can use as replies to rude attacks. Kind of answers that show, the logic of the Te guy is flawed.