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Handle with care

proteanmix

Plumage and Moult
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
5,514
Enneagram
1w2
Driving home, heard Fiona Apple's Criminal on the radio.

I've always found this line to be interesting: I've been careless with a delicate man...

How do you respond to delicate people?

Delicate in this question is neutral; it doesn't mean unreasonably sensitive. It can simply mean fragile or someone that needs to be handled gingerly, with a light touch. Do they frustrate you? Inspire you? Do you avoid them? Do they give you a chance to exercise your people skills?

Not to exclude children but I'd like to contain this to adults because I think most people naturally soften their approach when dealing with children who's understanding hasn't matured yet.
 

Mole

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 20, 2008
Messages
20,284
Driving home, heard Fiona Apple's Criminal on the radio.

I've always found this line to be interesting: I've been careless with a delicate man...

How do you respond to delicate people?

Delicate in this question is neutral; it doesn't mean unreasonably sensitive. It can simply mean fragile or someone that needs to be handled gingerly, with a light touch. Do they frustrate you? Inspire you? Do you avoid them? Do they give you a chance to exercise your people skills?

Not to exclude children but I'd like to contain this to adults because I think most people naturally soften their approach when dealing with children who's understanding hasn't matured yet.

Well, I'm a delicate man, so you could practise on me.
 

kyuuei

Emperor/Dictator
Joined
Aug 28, 2008
Messages
13,964
MBTI Type
enfp
Enneagram
8
Anyone more delicate than I am will frustrate me at some point in time. I cater to them because I want to be catered to as well, and I know I'm more delicate than some people I know and interact with.. and I'd want to be afforded the same curteosy.

It becomes a bother though when they're so sensitive that I cannot even communicate. I lose who I am because I lack myself in my friendship with them.. if it gets to that point, I drift away from those people. They need to be with someone that isn't as zealous as I am.
 

Wonkavision

Retired Member
Joined
Jan 14, 2009
Messages
1,154
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w8
Anyone more delicate than I am will frustrate me at some point in time. I cater to them because I want to be catered to as well, and I know I'm more delicate than some people I know and interact with.. and I'd want to be afforded the same curteosy.

It becomes a bother though when they're so sensitive that I cannot even communicate. I lose who I am because I lack myself in my friendship with them.. if it gets to that point, I drift away from those people. They need to be with someone that isn't as zealous as I am.

I really couldn't have said it better myself.

100% agreed.
 

kiddykat

movin melodies
Joined
Jul 27, 2008
Messages
1,111
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4, 7
Proteanmix, really great point..

I tend to get somewhat frustrated. With adults, I would hope that they're mature enough to communicate what's bothering them, 'constructively.'

If i sense that their intentions/behavior are inconsistent, dishonest, insincere, lacks integrity, I don't bother wasting my time.

If they clearly know that their behavior is NOT cool, then why act that way to begin with? Then play all victim about it? Makes me want to kick their rear. Not really, but internally I would. I find it aggravating when people cannot fess up to mistakes and project it off onto other people.

Passive-aggressiveness is something I don't tolerate well. On the other hand, I do believe in resolving issues, given the right time, place, and space for people to 'sort their feelings' out.
 

zillah

New member
Joined
Apr 18, 2009
Messages
34
MBTI Type
ISTJ
I've always found this line to be interesting: I've been careless with a delicate man...

How do you respond to delicate people?

Delicate in this question is neutral; it doesn't mean unreasonably sensitive. It can simply mean fragile or someone that needs to be handled gingerly, with a light touch. Do they frustrate you? Inspire you? Do you avoid them? Do they give you a chance to exercise your people skills?

When you say delicate, I see Fi dominant people as delicate. They are not fragile, but they do need a lighter touch. I really like them. I have to consciously change the way I do things, tone it down, phrase things more gently. But I enjoy doing it. They bring out the protector in me. I find myself thinking about how to improve my people skills as a result of our interactions (e.g. how to be a better listener and draw them out more - my INFP friend hardly tells me anything unless I ask!).
 

sculpting

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
4,148
I work with some folks that could be considered delicate. They and I will be at the same place for a long time so I do try and treat them delicately as long as they are not negatively hampering other folks.

Oddly the worst is an ISTJ, although there are a few ISFJs as well.
 
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