Does anyone else ever feel this way? Most of the time when I'm engaged and doing stuff, I'm fine but when I'm alone and in my head, I can get this feeling of dread and hopelessness that I can never get all the shit done that I have to, realizing I forgot to do this or that, or worrying about this or that small interaction with someone that didn't go as well as I would have liked. It could have been something as simple as a momentary expression on someone's face. At the same time, I start procrastinating, doing other things (like now) rather than what I need to get done. It makes me want to run away and live in the cabin in the middle of the woods, withdrawing from the rat race.
I think it's an N thing.
The following is probably going to sound a little whacko, but I have some time on my hands so I'll write out a few of my own theories about how N works.
As I see it, the "world view" behind N is the view that the world is kind of an oppressive, malevolent place. And that can be a good thing or a bad thing. If you have a lot of energy and are feeling ready to take on the world, then it's a good thing: The world is in need of change, and it's a place where you can invest some energy and make a real difference. But if you're stressed and tired and ground down by opposition and obstacles, then it's a bad thing: The world is a pernicious and evil place, and it'll trip you up when you're not looking.
In other words, as you become tired and burnt out with obstacles and stress, the thrill of the challenge turns into existential angst and a desire for shelter from the storm.
Here's how it works for Ne in particular. When Ne's are feeling good and energetic, they enjoy the challenge of a dark and potentially dangerous world and they immerse themselves in it. Ne-Doms are Extraverts, so they're open to just about any challenge or adventure. But if a long-term project or just life itself starts stressing them and grinding them down, that extraverted approach can leave them feeling overextended and burnt out. They can sink into passivity and helplessness, running as fast as they can just trying to keep up with all the demands and commitments they made in better times. And when they finally hit their limit, they can sink into sadomasochism, that is, alternately lashing out and beating up on people and/or falling into martyrdom and fatalism, i.e., just giving up and falling into depression.
Meantime, here's how it works for Ni in particular. When Ni's are feeling good and energetic, they enjoy the challenges of a contrarian world and see it as a way to hone their own ideas and skills: Iron sharpens iron. Ni's like debate and conflict, and they see conflict as improving both themselves and the world around them. But if a long-term project or just life itself starts stressing them and grinding them down, that approach can leave them feeling overextended and burnt out. They can start to white-knuckle a stubborn obstacle, grinding at it stubbornly or persistently in a control-freak manner. They can fall victim to tunnel-vision and paranoia, their whole world increasingly revolving around some stubborn project that simply won't yield to their efforts. When they finally hit their limit, they may decide that the world is simply too evil or stubborn or stupid to be changed and lash out in flight and asceticism. They may bury themselves away in a forest and live a primitivist existence. Or if that seems too radical, they'll bend to the demands of the world and live a curtailed, limited existence like others, but they'll forever mourn "the one that got away," or "what might have been." Life will turn increasingly sour and angst-y.
I think this is why TypoC can be such a negative message board sometimes. It's N-heavy (lots of N-Doms and N-Auxes), and when morale is low it can turn into an echo chamber about how screwed up the world is, how bad this or that oppressed group has it, etc. It's that N world view: The world is an oppressive, malevolent place. I participate at other message boards with a better balance of personality types, and those other message boards are noticeably more optimistic in tone than TypoC. TypoC really can be a pretty dark place sometimes.
What can one do about this N "world view" thing? Personally, as an Ne-Aux, when I get stressed I start to feel like I'm under a cloud, overexposed and vulnerable, kind of waiting for something bad to happen. But when that feeling arrives, I just remind myself that it's just static or white noise generated by stress. For example, I just went through a house move (two days ago--I'm still unpacking), and there were plenty of opportunities during the weeks of preparations leading up to the move for me to feel overwhelmed, paranoid, or freaked out about all the details and all the things that might go wrong. But I just reminded myself that it was my Ne-Aux acting up, sending me lots of negative vibes even when things were going smoothly enough otherwise. And I responded by focusing: I sat down, made a list or two, prioritized the top two or three things that really needed doing NOW, and concentrated on them and them alone. And so on. Basically when I got that "stressed-out Ne" feeling, I used that as a sign that it was time to focus a bit and apply some rationality rather than let indistinct and generalized fears burden me and slow me down.
So that would be my advice for Ne-related stress: Focus and incrementalism: prioritize the most important things, and do them by the numbers, one step at a time. For Ni-related stress, the opposite may be true. If Ni users are over-focusing and forever tinkering and being control freaks, and the project simply isn't yielding results, then maybe it's time for a paradigm change: If something isn't working, then maybe it's time to cut your losses and move on. Let it go, or at least figure out some new angle on it.
One other note: Comparing how N vs S operate: S works somewhat similiarly to N, but I would say that S is more about hostility. That is: N sees the world as oppressive and malevolent, whereas S sees the world as hostile. Thus, you get the Se who deals with a hostile world by always taking things to the next level, being competitive, and being the best at everything he undertakes; and you get the Si who deals with a hostile world by being an expert at rules and legalisms and automating everything to the point that they are faultless at things: The Si's are the cops and military of the world who shelter themselves from a chaotic, hostile world by being experts at rules and procedures so that they can't be caught out doing something wrong.
Anyway, this is all just my opinion. The same subject as the OP ("Anxious and overwhelmed") was on my own mind these last few weeks as a result of the Ne-Aux anxiety I was experiencing occasionally during the move, and so I'm taking a welcome break now that the move is over and dashing out a few thoughts on the subject.
