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  1. #1
    Senior Member Generalist's Avatar
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    Default What does merging mean to you type nines?

    Hi, I have read and heard this term, merging with others, how exactly would you describe that for you? Thanks to anyone who replies.

  2. #2
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    I just asked my 9 (who knows little about enneagram) this question and the answers were so ridiculous and funny I can't post them plus I don't think he really qualifies as a great "merging" example anyway.

    Basically what I understand it to mean is that they want to be one with the person closest to them. While this sounds great, they can get themselves lost in that - taking on the characteristics of that other person so much they lose their own identity, especially when they don't have a really potent identity to begin with. So, it's probably best in moderation.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.
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  3. #3
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    Congruency in life direction
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  4. #4
    Wallflower power! Punderstorm's Avatar
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    Subtly mimicking traits you like in others.
    IxxP-Conscientious-Slytherin-Leisurely-Idiosyncratic-9w1-4w3-7w6-sp/so-LII-Ne


    Of course it is happening inside your head, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?
    -J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

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  5. #5
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    Not a 9, but I'd like throw my 2 cents. Feel free to correct, dispute, add.

    Because 9s want to avoid conflict or anything which upsets their inner peace, they develop both permeable and sometimes thick boundaries (seemingly contradictory).
    Permeable in that it can show up as a tendency to take all sides of an argument, and conflating values and ideas of those they're comfortable with as their own.
    It's easier this way as having an actual identity/opinion of your own would require personal investment, exposing oneself to the various faculties of conflict: disagreements, judgement, aggression.
    There's some definition overlap between sx instinct and e9 merging, but my understanding, albeit wholly impression-based, sees sx instinct as more visceral, restless, and volatile, whereas e9 merging is shrouded in vaguery, inertness, melting. Like the song "Fade into You" - Hope Sandoval, a 9 fixer.

    Back to boundaries, I think it can be thick in that there's a stubborn denial or forgetfulness of anything negative or upsetting (perhaps more wing 8). Wing 1 is more fussy/bitchy about anything negative or upsetting, so it's more permeable, or easily affected.

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