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[Type 4] Fantasizing about emotional pain

Cellmold

Wake, See, Sing, Dance
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
6,266
I consider it a good exercise in mental preparation. Although nothing is ever perfect on that account.
 

fetus

New member
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Mar 22, 2015
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6w7
Oh yes. This is something I deal with on a regular basis (glad I'm not the only one). I've gotten a whole lot better, though. Not sure if it was masochism, self-hatred, or a need for sympathy.

But yeah, I've always struggled so much with self-pity and self-absorption.
 

mbagg170

New member
Joined
May 19, 2015
Messages
12
MBTI Type
ENFP
I think it may be a way of adding some drama and emotion into lives when there may not be much at the moment... or because we are preparing for something. Some of us just naturally like some sort of drama in our lives and so if we don't have it, we fantasize about it.
 

fetus

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Mar 22, 2015
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Do you also enjoy emotional pain rising due to physical pain?

If so you'd love having periods :D.

Ladies do you enjoy your periods? Sounds like a terrible idea but maybe there are people out there who enjoys it.

*runs*

No, no, no. That is one thing I could never even imagine enjoying. :dry:
 

mintleaf

Member
Joined
Jan 2, 2013
Messages
505
MBTI Type
infp
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp
Made me think of this:
Withdrawn Types and the Void

Type 4s experience the void in the heart centre. In compensation they focus themselves on filling the void with feelings and emotion, often very strong ones.

And yes, I have, but not since I started on antidepressants.
 

senza tema

nunc rosa cras fex
Joined
Oct 23, 2014
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sx/sp
This is basically my life.

11222020_10205899366816802_5723530375661449220_n.jpg
 

Qlip

Post Human Post
Joined
Jul 30, 2010
Messages
8,464
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ENFP
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sp/sx
I'm a little similar. I like to imagine how I'd act in certain situations - how to properly communicate my POV (because I suck at actually putting how I feel into word form), what I'd say to other people, what situations would lead to the next, etc. But then also it's fun to just imagine a more dramatic life. :blush: I love the cheesy and overhyped Grey's Anatomy-esque monologues. When I have moments like that I usually never forget them because the drama is just so intriguing.

I guess I just love to fantasize about drama, which includes pain a lot of the time. Ironically I also despise overdramatic people (especially because my school is overrun with theater kids). So it's really mostly fantasy where I love it because my life usually never elicits dramatic reaction from me. When dramatic moments happen naturally though I eat it up! OTOH people say I'm very sensitive so maybe it does leak over into my actual emotional life. :D

Hah, my fantasies only incidentally involve interactions with people and drama, they end up centered in the end on how I feeeeeeeel. My rl has the drama in it. I try to limit it or make sure that it's 'good' drama, but that is entirely a learned behavior from understanding the B.S. I have engaged in.

[MENTION=23222]senza tema[/MENTION] I've been close friends with an INFP 4 for a good while now. It always shocks me how strong his inner life is and how it projects on objective reality. I think people like to think of ENFPs and INFPs just being on a different spectrum of introversion. But I find cognitive function orders are a way better explanation for our differences.
 

Kullervo

Permabanned
Joined
May 15, 2014
Messages
3,298
MBTI Type
N/A
I daydream about heroism, passionate love and an irreversible metamorphosis where I and the world around me are moulded to my vision. Thus I more consciously dream about the ultimate triumph over death and pain. Becoming consumed by despair is one of my greatest fears. Emotional self-flaggelation is weak and unhealthy.

Maybe this indulgence stems from the fact that I have actually experienced real, physical pain many times in my life, almost to the point of dying. I have no need to imagine what it would be like to suffer.
 

Galena

Silver and Lead
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Mar 12, 2013
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sx/so
I'm prone to this in a less imaginary way - seeking aesthetics that boost a mood I want to encourage, researching uncomfortable subjects, seeing the worst in situations that are actually happening, imagining conversations that are imminent. I'm not always consciously aware of getting enjoyment out of it - pain is just painful - but the extent to which I'll hold onto these things even then heavily implies gratification. That implied gratification is one thing that really burned and made me feel called out when I read my first type 4 descriptions.

I don't get overwhelmed by multiple negative possibilities, which sounds more like tertiary or inferior Ne. When I'm nervously anticipating something, it's more like I imagine a single grim destiny and flesh it out inside to stupid detail, which at a certain point becomes a creative activity to pass the time, even fun. I am an expert on the life I don't want to live and who I don't want to be, maybe a little more than I know what I do want. But this hardly gets in the way of my seeking and working hard for a better outcome - I'm way too used to melancholy to be held back by it anymore. If something must be done, failing to do it isn't an option, no matter what I may be feeling.

This is all very 6-flavored, too - I do feel like the fantasies prepare me for potential loss, and as if just hoping for the best is like responding to an oncoming train by closing my eyes.
 

hjgbujhghg

I am
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Jun 6, 2013
Messages
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INFP
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4w3
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sx/so
It's just that emotional pain is an escape from dealing with the real shit in your life... The problem is it is highly addictive and when you lose the control over it, it becomes a real shit, because your brain simply rejects happiness... Then it is a circle, you don't really want to be happy, because being melancholic, sad or depressed or simply thinking about the dark side of life is so much more exciting, it's just a fantasy full of emotions where nothing else matters, just the current state of your mood and feeling and everything else is only darker and the more real things are, the more uninteresting and grey they become. Then you might realize that you're tired of being such a negativistic person, but real world and real feelings simply don't work for you so you realize you actually have to feel the fantasy of the pain, to avoid feeling the reality of the pain.
 

Morpeko

Noble Wolf
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Sep 20, 2017
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I don't find my life interesting or meaningful unless it's emotionally intense, and since I don't have many (if at all) times of intense positive emotions, I have to live in the constant negativity, I guess.
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
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I do this with future projections of emotional pain. I imagine what it is going to be like to feel it. I don't do it for entertainment, though. Maybe people do this the same way they watch sad movies? I've always had enough genuine real life emotional pain to have my quota rather filled. I don't need more as a diversion. The future projections are almost like rehearsals to get ready so it isn't so shocking when it does happen.
 

Kanra Jest

Av'ent'Gar'de ~
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Jun 30, 2015
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4w3
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sx/so
I explore emotions because they absolutely fascinate me. But here's the thing. I "probably" am not a core 4 because of the fact I normally don't experience much emotion. Normally I'm pretty placid, robotic, and I don't feel alot of emotions(though I do sorta fake it, except in random bursts of high energy or pain that might briefly hit me). I tend to numb it out when I start feeling any overwhelming pain nor do I ever show my vulnerability much aside from one on one friends which I do. Even if I'm somewhat analyzing it more than feeling it. However, the very four esq thing about me is that I do indeed fantasize alot. I fantasize about success, potentials or love (IF I'm in love, though I shut it off randomly too if need be), ect. I listen to very emotional music (not always am I in that state of mind but when I am, It gets VERY deep and poetic). I take moments alone to where I just give my emotions an outlet and start to bask in feeling, so that I can feel them, fantasize, and analyze and understand them for a while. i seek emotion out when I (in a neutral state of mind, especially without music or a trigger) I lack awareness of it. It's in these moments when I'm listening to music, that I end up deep feeling, poetic, I can be aware of it, ect. I adore music like a drug tbh. And not so much happy music as sad music because it brings up the deeper mysteries or purpose of life to think about, or people in it. Think in symbols and intuitive meanings. Whatever I want it to be. To which that line of thinking can end up very nihilistic, or idealistic. Without it though, i feel rather detached aside from random bursts of boredom.
 

Indigo Rodent

Active member
Joined
Apr 4, 2019
Messages
439
MBTI Type
INTP
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1w9
I do it as a 1w9. I have recurring masochistic fantasies because surrendering to them temporarily takes me out of the default state of Anger. I get so angry at vileness of the society that I get physically ill.
 

Maou

Mythos
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sx/sp
I do this a lot, and also use it to work through some of my emotions from the past, as I tend to find answers by imagining a story playing out where I dealt with those intense negative emotions. Other times I need to feel something to break up the endless apathy, because pain is better than nothing. It reminds me I am alive.
 

GoggleGirl17

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Dec 9, 2017
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ISFP
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sp/sx
I've done this at times, mostly out of apprehension, but what I've noticed is that it does allow you to experience relief after realizing the nightmare isn't real. Sometimes I get squeamish around sharp objects because I know how easy it would be to end a life and have reality change forever, but then I remember that I'm not a serial killer so it doesn't matter.
 
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