• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

[Type 1] Others Anger

á´…eparted

passages
Joined
Jan 25, 2014
Messages
8,265
A facebook post made me think of this.

E1's are often labeled as the types that have a strong link to anger and anger suppression. One thing that is never really brought up though, is the relation to other peoples anger. As an E1, I find that when someone else is angry and they're showing it, my respect for them starts to go down pretty sharply. Even if it's justified I want to roll my eyes and say "suck it up". I'll find I either have no sympathy for them, or want to punish them in some regard for acting on it. It's an emotion that I seldom experience and have very good control over, and when it does come out it's quick and minimal in impact.

There is a distinction though, it's acting upon anger that I take much more issue with. In others it sort of boils down to "you should be able to control your anger, and if you can't, that is your fault and you should suffer the consequences". It also makes me realize that I have a stronger connection to anger than I think of (as I usually think of it as the one thing that doesn't fit quite right for me in regards to enneagram). I will think "anger is an emotion you do not act upon. Ever, under any circumstances. You simply don't. Do do so is wrong and makes you wrong." In an ironic twist, it sort of triggers my anger "How dare you be angry! I will make you stop!"

Do other E1's experience this type of response? What do other types think of this?

Tagging other E1's: [MENTION=4945]EJCC[/MENTION] [MENTION=7111]fidelia[/MENTION] [MENTION=15246]SD45T-2[/MENTION] [MENTION=1449]Magic Poriferan[/MENTION]
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
About 75% of that. My distinctions:

1) I sometimes get catharsis from other people's anger to the point that I laugh out loud at it (and sometimes I do that with my own anger -- I call it "rage laughter", for lack of a better name)

2) If they're acting on their anger in a way that makes sense and is justifiable, then I'm fully in support of it. But I experience exactly the same frustration you described in the OP, with people who "act irrationally" or "have no impulse control". Ultimately I find those to be much greater sins than letting out anger -- and I try to never commit those sins (and I feel pretty awful and hypocritical when I do)


Edit: I think I used to be more like that than I currently am. Honestly I was reading it and flashed back to when I was a teenager. I think recently I've forced myself to not be angry when I see people venting about things, because so many people in my life have been the sorts of people who vent a lot. I've told myself that the "good friend" thing to do is to ignore my own feelings and think about theirs instead.
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
[MENTION=20829]Hard[/MENTION] some of your posts you do seem angry, especially when it comes to rules. I remember you getting what seemed like really angry (could be wrong) because someone got in trouble for breaking a rule or something, and me and a few others thought it was justified (I don't remember the exact situation) and you kept insisting that it was against the rules and it didn't matter if it was justified or not that because it was written that they should get punished and you were very stubborn. I think i have came up with a scenerio where it was life or death if the person obeyed the rule (death if they obeyed, but life if they broke it) didn't matter they broke the law should be punished was your point of view. I look at rules very differently than you, which is fine. I'm very angry but i'm also not a 1. e1s sometimes don't make sense to me. they sometimes come across too rigid.
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
Staff member
Joined
May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
MBTI Type
INFJ
Very much identify with what you said, Hard! Could have written a lot of that myself!
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
[MENTION=20829]Hard[/MENTION] some of your posts you do seem angry, especially when it comes to rules. I remember you getting what seemed like really angry (could be wrong) because someone got in trouble for breaking a rule or something, and me and a few others thought it was justified (I don't remember the exact situation) and you kept insisting that it was against the rules and it didn't matter if it was justified or not that because it was written that they should get punished and you were very stubborn.
Yeah I think it's a pretty typical 1 thing, to think that you're detached but actually come across as angry. I'm certainly guilty of that. There's this sample phrase that comes up in 1 descriptions, that's something along the lines of "I'm NOT angry, I'm just trying to FIX this thing that is CLEARLY BROKEN". :laugh:
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
Yeah I think it's a pretty typical 1 thing, to think that you're detached but actually come across as angry. I'm certainly guilty of that. There's this sample phrase that comes up in 1 descriptions, that's something along the lines of "I'm NOT angry, I'm just trying to FIX this thing that is CLEARLY BROKEN". :laugh:
ok so are 1s typically attracted to law enforcement? like cops, I can see an 8 but i wonder how many 1 cops their are. oh oh judges probably lot of judges who are 1s.

I too come across angry at times and don't feel angry. but then i get angry because people are saying i'm angry but i'm not. but i think the mechanisms for that is different. though in that situation i was angry, cuz i'm also stubborn and get all indignant and like well fine he/she not gonna listen to reason i'll just hope they fall.
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
ok so are 1s typically attracted to law enforcement? like cops, I can see an 8 but i wonder how many 1 cops their are. oh oh judges probably lot of judges who are 1s.
Oh hell yes.

I too come across angry at times and don't feel angry. but then i get angry because people are saying i'm angry but i'm not.

 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
is that why you were happy when you finally became a mod?
That's why I was happy when I was finally able to become a mod, yes. I'd wanted to for years, probably since 2010 or 2011, but didn't have time until recently.

I think it's safe to assume that that's also why [MENTION=20829]Hard[/MENTION] is a former forum moderator, and why [MENTION=15246]SD45T-2[/MENTION] is a law enforcement enthusiast. :)
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
That's why I was happy when I was finally able to become a mod, yes. I'd wanted to for years, probably since 2010 or 2011, but didn't have time until recently.

I think it's safe to assume that that's also why [MENTION=20829]Hard[/MENTION] is a former forum moderator, and why [MENTION=15246]SD45T-2[/MENTION] is a law enforcement enthusiast. :)
def not a 1 then, the idea of having to enforce rules and be a model citizen is not appealing at all to me.
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
def not a 1 then, the idea of having to enforce rules and be a model citizen is not appealing at all to me.
:laugh: Still figuring out your gut fix? Girl you're 100% 8.

(edit: I guess I could see 9w8. But I actually LOL'd at the idea of you having a 1 fix. No way Jose!)
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
:laugh: Still figuring out your gut fix? Girl you're 100% 8.

no I just want written evidence that I am not 1 for in the future when I get accused of it. I can refer to this thread.
 

Lady Lazarus

Permabanned
Joined
Jun 30, 2014
Messages
2,148
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I oddly relate to a lot of what you expressed despite possesing no 1 fix to speak of. I also feel like it's on the other person to control themselves and that they should be prepared to deal with the backlash or repricussions of their actions if they do not as they brought this upon themselves and therefore in my mind deserve whatever is coming to them. However I have been very guilty of saying things I've regretted when I've been angry in the past. :blush: Not that often anymore though.

I feel that when others get angry I find myself either disgusted or amused by them, not to mention irritated(which as you mentioned, is more than a little ironic). I feel very little love for those who so easily lose their composure, as well as very little respect. I find it very hard to muster up sympathy for them but if know them well enough I can sort of talk myself through it by recognizing that this is still "insert name here", and I shouldn't forget that as that would mean underestimating the effects of the current situation and other external factors, in order to help that person which I care about. Strangers are a completely different story though.
 

á´…eparted

passages
Joined
Jan 25, 2014
Messages
8,265
Hard some of your posts you do seem angry, especially when it comes to rules. I remember you getting what seemed like really angry (could be wrong) because someone got in trouble for breaking a rule or something, and me and a few others thought it was justified (I don't remember the exact situation) and you kept insisting that it was against the rules and it didn't matter if it was justified or not that because it was written that they should get punished and you were very stubborn. I think i have came up with a scenerio where it was life or death if the person obeyed the rule (death if they obeyed, but life if they broke it) didn't matter they broke the law should be punished was your point of view. I look at rules very differently than you, which is fine. I'm very angry but i'm also not a 1. e1s sometimes don't make sense to me. they sometimes come across too rigid.
ok so are 1s typically attracted to law enforcement? like cops, I can see an 8 but i wonder how many 1 cops their are. oh oh judges probably lot of judges who are 1s.

I too come across angry at times and don't feel angry. but then i get angry because people are saying i'm angry but i'm not. but i think the mechanisms for that is different. though in that situation i was angry, cuz i'm also stubborn and get all indignant and like well fine he/she not gonna listen to reason i'll just hope they fall.
That's why I was happy when I was finally able to become a mod, yes. I'd wanted to for years, probably since 2010 or 2011, but didn't have time until recently.

I think it's safe to assume that that's also why Hard is a former forum moderator, and why SD45T-2 is a law enforcement enthusiast. :)

Yep! Speaking of which, I'm the new head of rules in Humans Vs. Zombies at my school now. I am drawn to leadership positions, all the way back to early childhood. I always wanted to be "in charge" and be able to enforce the rules, direct everyone around, etc.. It felt natural and I got a lot out of it. A lot of it though is out of the desire for things to work well and fix things that are broken as EJCC pointed out.

I'm annoyed easily, but I am difficult to anger. There's only been a handful of times I have ever truly gotten angry on here. Usually I think it's pretty self evident when that occurs, but text isn't always as clear as intended so it's difficult to say. Situations like you pointed out though can anger me because I'll say "this is how it is" and if I keep repeating myself I run out of ways to make people see/accept what I'm saying, so I want to resort to head-bonking.

I think the distinction here is what is the reason behind the anger.
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
. Situations like you pointed out though can anger me because I'll say "this is how it is" and if I keep repeating myself I run out of ways to make people see/accept what I'm saying, so I want to resort to head-bonking.

me too, which is why I don't debate you because we're both stubborn and it just ends up head-bonking. and both of us are convinced we're right and the other's wrong, but isn't listening. and because of our stubbornness we get no where. I only argue with people when i think there's a chance of changing their mind. of course it's really hard for people to change my mind, so I am hypocrit
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Yep! Speaking of which, I'm the new head of rules in Humans Vs. Zombies at my school now. I am drawn to leadership positions, all the way back to early childhood. I always wanted to be "in charge" and be able to enforce the rules, direct everyone around, etc.. It felt natural and I got a lot out of it. A lot of it though is out of the desire for things to work well and fix things that are broken as EJCC pointed out.
Yeah -- it comes naturally to me too. I don't know if all 1s enjoy taking charge like that, because most of the joy is in seeing everything run smoothly. The take-charge thing probably has more to do with MBTI. Non-take-charge 1s are probably more likely to remain in their same position and try to do what they can from the sidelines -- or bitch about it because they feel like there's nothing they can do, or like it's not their job so they SHOULDN'T have to do it.

I'm annoyed easily, but I am difficult to anger. There's only been a handful of times I have ever truly gotten angry on here. Usually I think it's pretty self evident when that occurs, but text isn't always as clear as intended so it's difficult to say. Situations like you pointed out though can anger me because I'll say "this is how it is" and if I keep repeating myself I run out of ways to make people see/accept what I'm saying, so I want to resort to head-bonking.

I think the distinction here is what is the reason behind the anger.
Are you defining anger based on behavior, or based on feeling? I ask because I tend to define annoyance and irritation as being a mild/low point on the rage spectrum.
 

á´…eparted

passages
Joined
Jan 25, 2014
Messages
8,265
me too, which is why I don't debate you because we're both stubborn and it just ends up head-bonking. and both of us are convinced we're right and the other's wrong, but isn't listening. and because of our stubbornness we get no where. I only argue with people when i think there's a chance of changing their mind. of course it's really hard for people to change my mind, so I am hypocrit

Likewise. Though I have debated with you before and we've come to agreements so I don't avoid it :). If I see that common ground won't be found I almost always end the discussion or don't start with it to begin with. For example, I have a TON of opinions on politics but because there's so many individuals here who have views polarized to mine, and they'll never budge, I don't even bother. I withhold my tongue around 90% of the time because of it.

Yeah -- it comes naturally to me too. I don't know if all 1s enjoy taking charge like that, because most of the joy is in seeing everything run smoothly. The take-charge thing probably has more to do with MBTI. Non-take-charge 1s are probably more likely to remain in their same position and try to do what they can from the sidelines -- or bitch about it because they feel like there's nothing they can do, or like it's not their job so they SHOULDN'T have to do it.

Are you defining anger based on behavior, or based on feeling? I ask because I tend to define annoyance and irritation as being a mild/low point on the rage spectrum.

It might be MBTI-1 interplay. Introverted 1's that I know generally aren't like us in that regard. They can be, but generally not.

I'm sort of defining it as both. I let annoyance and irritation out easily when appropriate (I'm known IRL for being easy to read and being expressive), and it's a low on the rage spectrum. After that though; it starts to get restrained. So much so that when I feel mid level rage it actually appears to be a very mild or non-exsistent irritation. I instinctively cap it and stuff it. Full blown is near impossible for it to come out. Something has to make me slip as I can't willingly do it. IRL less than 5 people have seen it happen, and each was only once.

As I get irritated easily though, people generally think I am very particular, moody, and opinionated. Which is true. That said it's simply because that gets outwardly expressed. I don't really catagorize it as anger. Ironically, everyone else seems to? :shrug: My emotions are very strong, and always have been, so it's like the entire mood meter is much larger, thus caps are higher up despite being in the same relative positions.

If I have to completely restrain all of my thoughts feelings and opinions all the time for extended periods I get all kinds of messed up, so it's possible that my frequencey of low level release is why it's very hard for my anger to rise to danger levels.
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
Likewise. Though I have debated with you before and we've come to agreements so I don't avoid it :). If I see that common ground won't be found I almost always end the discussion or don't start with it to begin with. For example, I have a TON of opinions on politics but because there's so many individuals here who have views polarized to mine, and they'll never budge, I don't even bother. I withhold my tongue around 90% of the time because of it.
perhaps what I consider debating some of the time (and this has been confirmed) is me trying to get a better picture of the situation. that's a whole nother issue i'm a curious person and i figure it makes sense to ask the source and i never have any intention of using the information against them I just want to understand and i've pissed a few people off doing that, and that has turned into "debates"

maybe it depends on the topic.

it's weird i feel we're very similar yet very different at the same time.
 

Bush

cute lil war dog
Joined
Nov 18, 2008
Messages
5,182
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
People who can't control themselves come across as huge babies. Aside from the obvious message that there is some thing that they don't like, what they say is often just fluff. Loud fluff.

But sometimes enjoyable fluff.

and that has turned into "debates"
Oh man, same here. It's amazing that people get angry when you ask a neutral question that to them may slightly have the implication that you believe something that they don't.

'Okay, I get it; you have strong convictions about this one particular thing. I got that in the first two minutes of the conversation with you. I don't need to hear ranting and raving for another two hours, thanks'
 

brainheart

New member
Joined
Aug 18, 2014
Messages
77
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I get what the OP is saying. I can definitely at times feel holier than thou when someone loses his temper and I'm keeping my cool. The hypocrisy is that my 1 fix is that of the sexual nature (not to mention I'm a core sx 4) and I get angry all the damn time. It took me forever to come to terms with my 1 fix for this reason. Sexual ones are often mistaken for eights due to their expression of anger. Difference is the sexual one is filled to the brim with criticism. In other words, lots of ranting.
 
Top