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[Type 8] Enneagram 8 and testing

valaki

New member
Joined
Jan 1, 2014
Messages
940
MBTI Type
SeNi
Enneagram
8+7
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Reactive types in general test others out. I can't say it does much to help any relationship, but it does keep things interesting.

I have no desire to test people's reactions to me, incidentally. I rather expect them not to like me anyway; if they can't handle me, it's their own problem. If I "test" at all, it's in the form of storming away to see what they'll do in response.

Would you like people to run after you?

Hm what I do is just pour my temper over them when in a conflict telling them what to do/not to do, lots of swear words, shouting, throwing shit, blahblah. I will also do something similar when frustrated by something else, except I don't direct an attack to the person, just simply express myself uninhibited about the frustration. I don't really do "storming away".

They pass if they don't get deeply offended & still continue to accept me the way I am.

Why do you see it as their problem if they can't handle you?


Clearly...

It was pretty clear to me he was just being enthusiastic ;p
 

Chad of the OttomanEmpire

Give me a fourth dot.
Joined
Jun 9, 2013
Messages
1,053
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NeTi
Enneagram
478
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sx/so
baha are you a 4?

actually I find myself doing something similar but for different reasons. Usually its to see if they will chase after me, and in doing so get off their butt and start taking action in their life, thus testing to see if they can actually support themself.
I'm pretty sure I defy enneagram logic, actually, but it would be accurate to locate my heart center at 4 and my gut center at 8. I'm one of the two, but a piss poor example of either.

Cool way to utilize the Running Away schtick, btw.

Would you like people to run after you?
I'm not exactly sure what they're supposed to do, actually. Sometimes they're supposed to follow me and apologize for offending my Majesty, sometimes they're supposed to fuck off.

Hm what I do is just pour my temper over them when in a conflict telling them what to do/not to do, lots of swear words, shouting, throwing shit, blahblah. I will also do something similar when frustrated by something else, except I don't direct an attack to the person, just simply express myself uninhibited about the frustration. I don't really do "storming away".
Oh I can do the raging asshole thing, complete with me foaming and throwing things at others' heads. It was just never effective in my household or with my peers. I learned the "storm away" thing instead, pathetic and weak though it is. And it's actually a bad strategy, because it seldom affects others as I probably have intended. Dunno why I keep doing it.

Why do you see it as their problem if they can't handle you?
Honestly, because I've become too lazy and too unable to connect with others to care. Everyone's just sort of expendable background static. Sad but true.
 

the resident

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Jan 25, 2014
Messages
70
MBTI Type
esfj
Enneagram
3w8
This brings to mind Marilyn's, "If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best."
 

valaki

New member
Joined
Jan 1, 2014
Messages
940
MBTI Type
SeNi
Enneagram
8+7
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I'm pretty sure I defy enneagram logic, actually, but it would be accurate to locate my heart center at 4 and my gut center at 8. I'm one of the two, but a piss poor example of either.

haha I feel for you, I defy the logic too;)


Oh I can do the raging asshole thing, complete with me foaming and throwing things at others' heads. It was just never effective in my household or with my peers. I learned the "storm away" thing instead, pathetic and weak though it is. And it's actually a bad strategy, because it seldom affects others as I probably have intended. Dunno why I keep doing it.

Yeah well I don't do it because it's supposed to be "effective". I just do :/


Everyone's just sort of expendable background static. Sad but true.

Lol a good way to put it ......
 

Octavarium

New member
Joined
Jan 27, 2014
Messages
71
so throughout my life I perform what I call "THE RAPE TEST." This is where I very colorfully paint a picture in another person's mind with sensual images.

if they can't handle it I move on because they won't be able to handle me at my worst. if they can, I proceed.

any other 8's do something similar?

does it help anything in your relationships or does it seem to just cause more problems?

How do you determine whether they can or can't handle it?
 

Starry

Active member
Joined
May 22, 2010
Messages
6,103
I'm pretty sure I defy enneagram logic, actually, but it would be accurate to locate my heart center at 4 and my gut center at 8. I'm one of the two, but a piss poor example of either.

Cool way to utilize the Running Away schtick, btw.


I'm not exactly sure what they're supposed to do, actually. Sometimes they're supposed to follow me and apologize for offending my Majesty, sometimes they're supposed to fuck off.


Oh I can do the raging asshole thing, complete with me foaming and throwing things at others' heads. It was just never effective in my household or with my peers. I learned the "storm away" thing instead, pathetic and weak though it is. And it's actually a bad strategy, because it seldom affects others as I probably have intended. Dunno why I keep doing it.


Honestly, because I've become too lazy and too unable to connect with others to care. Everyone's just sort of expendable background static. Sad but true.


I don't want to take away from Azure Flame's thread... but I must tell you how well I relate to this post.
When you say 'unable to connect' what do you mean though? I'm quite certain I could *make* a connection... I just do not possess the desire...having been so profoundly disappointed by people's ignorance and the lies they tell (I'm not so bothered by the lies they tell me as the truth in those instances is easy enough to see...it's the lies they tell themselves that I no longer wish to deal with.)

What's a si-inf? Si is not my friend...but Ni is. I'm ENFP though...and I always thought you were as well...?
 

Chad of the OttomanEmpire

Give me a fourth dot.
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I don't want to take away from Azure Flame's thread... but I must tell you how well I relate to this post.
When you say 'unable to connect' what do you mean though? I'm quite certain I could *make* a connection... I just do not possess the desire...having been so profoundly disappointed by people's ignorance and the lies they tell (I'm not so bothered by the lies they tell me as the truth in those instances is easy enough to see...it's the lies they tell themselves that I no longer wish to deal with.)

What's a si-inf? Si is not my friend...but Ni is. I'm ENFP though...and I always thought you were as well...?
"Unable to connect" is pretty much what you say it is...there are "other people" somewhere in the background, they probably suck, my own needs and inner sense of peace are more important than they are, and...what were we talking about, anyway? "Other people"? Blech. No desire to acknowledge their presence, much less reach out to them. I move through a world populated by stage props and extras, useless things to be pushed out of my way or used minimally to entertain an audience.

I'm an ENTP now. It became painfully obvious. Nah, Si is not my friend, but I find that the label "Si-inferior" highly representative of all the screwed up stuff I've ever done in life. It's actually far more accurate than labeling me an "extravert", which I am really not. Hence my surprise at discovering I was Ne-dom!
 
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