[Type 8] 8s: Please Don't Have Children

[Showbread]

My father is an 8 and I know there is a lot of things that make up a person and I do love him, but he is not a very good father. Aside from not understanding me at all, (he's an ENTJ, I'm an INFP) he is very controlling.

Obviously, do whatever you want, have children if you please, but I just hope that if one potential or current parent reads this and decides to not try to control their child and/or spouse, I have done their family some good.

Further, as eights, what do you desire to control? Being a four and having many four friends, we all have our purpose, so I thought maybe eights all have their thing they desire to control.

Well, then you'll be pleased to know my INTJ 8w1 friend plans to have her tubes tied at 21. She hates kids.

 

[Azure Flame]

this thread is ridiculous. I think your problem lies with Te doms, not 8's.

If you had problems with an 8, it would be because he/she was bullying you, made a shitty employee, relationship miscommunications or ultimately found you to be underwhelming. The end.

Also, I think a lot of people posting here are taking this to heart a little more than they should.

Also, are 8's really that controlling? where is this stereotype coming from? Most of the controlling people in my life have been 1's 2's 3's, and 6's... even 4's. If anything, I trust other people way too much. The only "control" I actually have is who enters my life and continues speaking to me at specific times of the day, and the fact that, business wise, I'm extremely hard to get a hold of, and my 2nd in command tells telemarketers that I'm on a forever business trip to new zealand. lol.

I am very much in control of the direction and shape that my life takes, but past that I leave everyone alone (unless I'm bored and feel like shooting people with spitballs or cursing at children in walmart).

I suppose it could be viewed as controlling when I'm in a relationship and I ask them for every detail of their life... more often than not I'm just running out of tangible conversation topics, and I like to feel what my partner feels, I like to become them.

 

[skylights]

All parents screw their kids up in their own way, the good ones give their kids the tools to deal with that.

Truth

 

[Sunny Ghost]

Any type can be unhealthy.

Agreed.

My dad is an ESFP 7w8 or 8w7. He was always a very aggressive and controlling person. However, he was also very loving and fun. Mostly, I learned to be incredibly obedient to avoid his war path, and I'm honestly more of a daddy's girl, than a mama's girl. My sister (ESFJ e6) is the opposite. She has more resentment towards my father and is closer with our ISFP e2 mom.

The pro's were definitely the fact that he was fun and would spoil us often. He'd often do silly dances and sing around the house. The con's were that he could hulk out at a moment's notice.

I always took a lot of my dad's negative behavior to be a product of his own childhood environment. He was abused and ran away a couple of time to get away from my drunk grandfather. I didn't realize how bad it was until I saw my father's and my aunt's and uncles reactions to my grandfathers funeral. Obviously my sister and I didn't see that side of our grandfather. But at the funeral, it was pretty clear he was not a good man. They felt no sadness at his death.

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I also wanted to add, that having such a strong minded father made my sister and I very strong females, too. We aren't the type that can be pushed around. Not even by our own dad. If he yells at us, we don't hesitate to yell back and point out his irrationality. So even though he was hard to live with at times, he was still a good man or at least tried to be.

 

[Abbey]

You're probably right about it being a Te issue, though obviously I don't hate Te-doms and it's a weakness of the individual not of everyone who has Te.
I think I may have greatly misinterpreted 8s. Can you sum up what 8s are?


I apologize to everyone I offended for this post. I don't regret it though because if I hadn't, I would have never learned.

 

[tralala]

This doesn't make any sense to me.

Te dom. 8w7.

Children to me are sacred.

It hurts me to see them abused. They represent innocence to me. And, that's the only source of my creativity.