[Type 9] Type Nine: Are you drawn to other Type Nines?

[gromit]

Romantically or for friends? I think I am. I like when we are on the same wavelength. I like when things are relaxed and everyone is getting along, and I like people who appreciate that too.

Although I think there's value in other types of relationships. I just think that is what naturally attracts me.

 

[Ism]

Hmm . . . I don't think so! I have only one friend who I think is a type 9. We're close, but I don't really gravitate toward 9s in general.

=o

 

[Kasper]

Romantically I haven't been, can't say if I would be, however in terms of friendships, hella yeah. It's just so easy, neither person wants conflict, both people are paying attention to the other's needs, judgement doesn't enter the equation, it can be very chill and a place where I can feel my defences slipping away as I do not need to be on the look out for potential conflict.

A romantic relationship with a 9 would be difficult imo due to the common strengths/weaknesses, I can see it being a giant bubble of un-reality and as self improvement is such a priority for me it wouldn't provide "push" or motivation which I think I would want/need.

 

[wolfy]

Friendship, for sure. A lot of the people I made friends with on here turned out to be nines. Romantically, I haven't given much thought. I haven't given much thought to the previous friendship statement either, but there you have it...

 

[Fluffywolf]

What other people said.

This is just a rough estimate, but based on my attractions, I think I'm attracted to enneagram 6's most of the times. Ironically, it is one of the few types I can easily keep under my thumbs(ie. play the more dominant role/being the descision maker). I wonder if there is an underlying presence of insecurities, or if it just stems from my perceiver dominance. Easy and effecient!

But then again, some 8 females are seriously hot as well, as long as they have the intellect to back it up. Which is pretty much the opposite from 6, in contrast to 9. So I really don't know.

I'm pretty sure no one I've been attracted to was 9 though.

 

[011235813]

I have a couple of close 9 friends and I once pined after a fellow INFP 9. That went nowhere fast. Generally, I'm attracted to more polarizing types though: usually 1s, counterphobic 6s, and sometimes 8s, who have a mobilizing effect on me.

 

[_eric_]

I don't really know, I've always been very attracted to fours though.

 

[acronach]

[MENTION=9486]gromit[/MENTION] are you an SX-dom by any chance?

also, i have a 9 in my tritype and i think i'm attracted to 9s a little 0.0 can't really see myself setteling down with a 9 though, you guys are awesome and all but i'll need someone more 3-ish to keep my head on straight XD

 

[gromit]

[MENTION=9486]gromit[/MENTION] are you an SX-dom by any chance?

also, i have a 9 in my tritype and i think i'm attracted to 9s a little 0.0 can't really see myself setteling down with a 9 though, you guys are awesome and all but i'll need someone more 3-ish to keep my head on straight XD

Naw I think SP and then SX and SO last? Pretty close on all three.

 

[Rail Tracer]

I've been told that I have a grounding effect on others, which is really useful on people who are "out there."

Friendship with another 9, yes, that would work.

I don't know how a romantic one will work though. It'll probably be a bit too boring for me.

 

[Ryadai]

The majority of my friends are usually type 6's and 7's - I can't say I talk to other type 9's enough. I don't think I've even been romantically interested in one either.

 

[Joehobo]

There isn't many that I come across to be drawn to. I've not had a romantic interest in one also.

 

[sulfit]

Similarminds chart displays compatibility between type 9 and type 1, so these two types should be drawn to each other. Makes me think that some 9s drawn to other 9s are 1w9s with a strong wing who have typed themselves incorrectly into their wing type.

 

[skylights]

e9 boyfriend has several good friends who also strike me as 9s.

This is just a rough estimate, but based on my attractions, I think I'm attracted to enneagram 6's most of the times. Ironically, it is one of the few types I can easily keep under my thumbs(ie. play the more dominant role/being the descision maker).

The majority of my friends are usually type 6's and 7's - I can't say I talk to other type 9's enough.

Generally, I'm attracted to more polarizing types though: usually 1s, counterphobic 6s, and sometimes 8s, who have a mobilizing effect on me.

9 and 6 seems to be a pretty good combination. I work with another 6, very cp, who is very happily married to a 9. I think the 9 peacefulness and optimism is very comforting to the 6, and I guess the 6 energy and analysis is appealing to the 9. It's a nice balance, I feel like, because we kind of pull each other back in the places where we start to get too caught up in ourselves. Both types also have an interesting desire to unite - 9 to meld and 6 to belong - so it's easy to attach to one another, where we feel mutual acceptance and inclusion.

 

[Zarathustra]

Similarminds chart displays compatibility between type 9 and type 1, so these two types should be drawn to each other. Makes me think that some 9s drawn to other 9s are 1w9s with a strong wing who have typed themselves incorrectly into their wing type.

Personally, I think that similarminds chart is crap.

It's based off the idea that, for some reason, relationships that "add up to" 10w10 are ideal (1w9+9w1, 4w5+6w5, etc).

What kind of basis is that? Spiritual? That 10 would be completion, and we need to find our other part to get there?

There's barely even any explanation for it, and, as such, imo, it should be taken with a huge dose of salt.

I have no idea what he means by main type vs mean type. What the hell is a mean type??

It seems to be based of some "omni" concept of enneagram or something.

I also don't think the stuff about instinctual variants is accurate.

http://www.similarminds.com/idealtypes.html

 

[Kasper]

9 and 6 seems to be a pretty good combination. I work with another 6, very cp, who is very happily married to a 9. I think the 9 peacefulness and optimism is very comforting to the 6, and I guess the 6 energy and analysis is appealing to the 9. It's a nice balance, I feel like, because we kind of pull each other back in the places where we start to get too caught up in ourselves. Both types also have an interesting desire to unite - 9 to meld and 6 to belong - so it's easy to attach to one another, where we feel mutual acceptance and inclusion.

I wouldn't say 6 and 9 was pretty good, that down plays how amazing the connection can be!

 

[skylights]

I wouldn't say 6 and 9 was pretty good, that down plays how amazing the connection can be!

Well, that is true. I didn't want to overgeneralize my own experience. But yes, my 9 is my haven, my healing balm, and my home.

 

[Lux]

I don't think I know another 9. I would really like to get to know someone that does identify with 9 because I do think there would be a connection.

 

[sulfit]

Personally, I think that similarminds chart is crap.

It's based off the idea that, for some reason, relationships that "add up to" 10w10 are ideal (1w9+9w1, 4w5+6w5, etc).

What kind of basis is that? Spiritual? That 10 would be completion, and we need to find our other part to get there?

I don't know what is the basis of 10 being the magic number, but this enneagram compatibility study confirms some of it. There are quite a few 2-8 and 1-9 pairings: http://www.9types.com/writeup/enneagram_marriages.html

If you read through the profiles of 1s and 9s it makes sense that they go well together. 1s can provide the impetus to move 9 to decision and action, since 1s are people of action themselves. 9s are non-critical, and relatively easy-going and all accepting, which can soothe the anxieties and angry outbursts of 1s. 1s tend to be very opinionated and 9s are inclined to say "sure" and go along instead of arguing.

I can't imagine two fives together though, as that chart suggests.

 

[Zarathustra]

I don't know what is the basis of 10 being the magic number, but this enneagram compatibility study confirms some of it. There are quite a few 2-8 and 1-9 pairings: http://www.9types.com/writeup/enneagram_marriages.html

Yeah, I'm familiar with that data.

And I trust it far more than similarmind's homespun crackpot theory.

There might be a good number of 2-8 and 1-9 pairings, but how about 5-5, 4-6, 7-3?

Hell, the only one of those ten pairings that is actually over-represented is 8 husband, 2 wife.

And the 6 husband, 4 wife pairing is underrepresented, so there's no apparent overall over-representation.

In fact, 1 females are more likely to get with 2s, 5s and 7s, and 1 males with 3s, 5s (2 sd's above chance), and 7s.

Also, the above points to another problem with the similarminds chart: it doesn't differentiate between men and women.

And that 9types data shows that a clear differentiation exists between men and women and the relationships they choose to enter.