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[Type 1] Talk to me, 1s

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
:hi:

How do you deal with your feelings, emotions & desires?
What is the experience/process of repressing them like (or whatever you do with them)?
When & how do you ever act on them?
What convinces you that your own feelings, emotions and/or desires are valid or not problematic?

How does one get you to talk more openly of yourself?
You seem to like to hide your personal side; is that a correct perception?

What makes someone appealing/attractive to you, both romantically & platonically?

How does your wing influence your personality?
And your instinctual stack?

What do you hate to be like?
How do you like to be?
How do you like to be perceived?

What's an impression others often have of you that is not accurate and/or is surprising to you in a negative way?
What's an impression others often have of you that is surprising in a positive way?

Answer as many/few as you'd like.
 

Eugene Watson VIII

Senor Membrae
Joined
Jun 22, 2012
Messages
824
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xxxP
Enneagram
?
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
9w1 reporting in

My 1 wing restrains whatever is counteractive to the holy idea. But being a 9 this motivation isn't as great as it would be for a 1. The experience usually feels good as I feel I am closer to the holy idea but too much repression can end up in disdain and stuff. This repression seems stronger around other people since they normally go against the idea.

My wing gives me more drive to do/be something than like a pure 9, I'd say. It gives more refinement to my tritype.

Sorry if you're annoyed I'm not a 1 :D
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I wrote this giant reply... and then it was maintenance time, and it deleted the entire thing. So! Another try, but briefer this time -- and feel free to ask follow-up questions if my answers are too general/vague to make sense.
How do you deal with your feelings, emotions & desires?
I accept them if I consider them valid and/or appropriate. Otherwise I set them aside.

What is the experience/process of repressing them like (or whatever you do with them)?
If I'm resentful about repressing them, then they boil inside me and make themselves impossible to ignore -- and the resentment makes them stronger and worse than they were originally. But eventually they die down, and I suppose the dieing down process is repression, in a sense.
If I'm not resentful about it, then it's as simple as telling my feelings that they aren't useful, and focusing really hard on what should be focused on instead. If I ignore the emotion long enough, then it goes away. Literally.


When & how do you ever act on them?
I act on them when it's appropriate to.

What convinces you that your own feelings, emotions and/or desires are valid or not problematic?
After I have the gut reaction (and it's always a gut reaction) that my emotion is valid, I will myself into black-and-white thinking; I get so excited that my emotions aren't dismissable, for once in my life, that I make myself believe that accepting the emotions 100%, and acting on them in a completely uncensored way, is justifiable because the emotions themselves are justifiable, and because shouldn't I have the right to let it all out as a reward for keeping it held in for so long? (This happens a lot with righteous anger; if someone questions it, you'll hear me say "Why shouldn't I be angry? I have every right to be angry!")

How does one get you to talk more openly of yourself?
Be my friend. Be open and receptive. Earn my trust.

You seem to like to hide your personal side; is that a correct perception?
It is.

What makes someone appealing/attractive to you, both romantically & platonically?
I love it when there's more to a person than meets the eye. A lot of the time, I end up befriending people because they want to befriend me, not the other way around, but the people I actively seek out are the ones I find interesting, and the ones that I can learn from. This is the case both romantically and platonically -- and in both cases, I won't chase them down if they show no interest in me, although I may pine after them a little.

How does your wing influence your personality?
I care too much about what other people think of me. I also consider myself duty-bound to other people, simply because they're people and they're in my vicinity -- regardless of whether I know them or not (although my duty to my friends and family is obviously thousands of times stronger). So because of my wing, I'm not as independent as I could be, and there are limits to my ability to go off on my own and do what I want.

And your instinctual stack?
I'm not clear on whether I'm sp/so, but if I am -- and I probably am -- then it influences my personality by making me become self-focused under emotional stress. Even though, as I said before, I'm fairly other-focused and have a duty to others, if I'm having a rough time, my first thought is getting through it, whatever it takes. I'll maintain an accidentally self-imposed isolation from the rest of the world, because I'm too focused on solving my own issues to remember that other duties exist. (My mom knows when I'm having a rough time when she doesn't hear from me for a few days.)

What do you hate to be like?
Worthy of being dismissed, e.g. for being ignorant, stupid, or shallow.

How do you like to be?
Worthy of respect, and acknowledged for what I work hardest for/at.

How do you like to be perceived?
See above.

What's an impression others often have of you that is not accurate and/or is surprising to you in a negative way?
A quote I often hear from people: "I didn't know you felt so strongly about that." Which I suppose means that people assume that my still waters don't run deep, i.e. that I'm not a deep person, simply because I don't talk about my deepest feelings.

What's an impression others often have of you that is surprising in a positive way?
My roommate once told me that I seemed like the sort of person who would make great personal sacrifices for my values. I was surprised by that at the time because we didn't know each other all that well, so I don't know what I could have told her that would give her that impression.

Answer as many/few as you'd like.
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
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4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
9w1 reporting in

My 1 wing restrains whatever is counteractive to the holy idea. But being a 9 this motivation isn't as great as it would be for a 1. The experience usually feels good as I feel I am closer to the holy idea but too much repression can end up in disdain and stuff. This repression seems stronger around other people since they normally go against the idea.

My wing gives me more drive to do/be something than like a pure 9, I'd say. It gives more refinement to my tritype.

Sorry if you're annoyed I'm not a 1 :D

What is this "holy idea"? :huh: :D

I wrote this giant reply... and then it was maintenance time, and it deleted the entire thing. So! Another try, but briefer this time -- and feel free to ask follow-up questions if my answers are too general/vague to make sense.

And your instinctual stack?
I'm not clear on whether I'm sp/so, but if I am -- and I probably am -- then it influences my personality by making me become self-focused under emotional stress. Even though, as I said before, I'm fairly other-focused and have a duty to others, if I'm having a rough time, my first thought is getting through it, whatever it takes. I'll maintain an accidentally self-imposed isolation from the rest of the world, because I'm too focused on solving my own issues to remember that other duties exist. (My mom knows when I'm having a rough time when she doesn't hear from me for a few days.)

Thanks for the reply!

This sounds like 4 disintegration actually (something that will occur when under stress). Although, it does not mean that you are not sp/so.

I will ask these as well:
Is anger the emotion you accept as valid the most often?
Do you differentiate at all between "feelings" and "emotions"?
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Is anger the emotion you accept as valid the most often?
Generally, yes, because it's the most useful of the two primary negative emotions, i.e. sadness and anger. Sadness leads to inertia; anger leads to action. Sadness leads to giving up; anger leads to trying again, harder than you've ever tried.

Also, I'm not one of those people who savors feeling sad. For example: some of the INFJs I know enjoy feeling like a martyr on occasion. I get the impression that they savor their moments of martyrdom in the same way that I savor my moments of righteous anger. But I absolutely loathe wallowing in feelings of hopelessness and victimization. Nothing feels worse to me, than the world being out of balance and being unable to set it right. But anger creates determination, and keeps you from feeling that profoundly unsatisfying desperation.
Do you differentiate at all between "feelings" and "emotions"?
I had been using them interchangeably. Is there a difference?
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
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INFP
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sp/sx
^ Well, that answers the question :D.

Yes, they are different. Generally, emotions are physiological responses & feeling is rational cognition which assigns personal value (ie. significance, importance, etc). Of course, emotion & cognition have no clear line.

Do you see your moral obligations or that need to be "perfect" as your feelings or do the two clash?

What about other feelings/emotions which may be inappropriate, such as lasciviousness (or whatever)?

Oh yeah, and sadness for an e4 is a sort of exploration of human feeling which can lead to a greater awareness of self & people in general & what they need/how they work. It's like diving deep in murky water in hopes of finding a pearl. Beauty can come out of it, especially when the e4 is creatively inspired. Or you can drown...
 

Usehername

On a mission
Joined
May 30, 2007
Messages
3,794
:hi:

How do you deal with your feelings, emotions & desires?
What is the experience/process of repressing them like (or whatever you do with them)?
When & how do you ever act on them?
What convinces you that your own feelings, emotions and/or desires are valid or not problematic?

How does one get you to talk more openly of yourself?
You seem to like to hide your personal side; is that a correct perception?

What makes someone appealing/attractive to you, both romantically & platonically?

How does your wing influence your personality?
And your instinctual stack?

What do you hate to be like?
How do you like to be?
How do you like to be perceived?

What's an impression others often have of you that is not accurate and/or is surprising to you in a negative way?
What's an impression others often have of you that is surprising in a positive way?

Answer as many/few as you'd like.


I'm extraordinarily self-disciplined, and I don't like to emit negative emotions out into the world IRL. I put a lot of energy into being patient rather than angry, until it's been far too long and I should have stopped caring about something, or the dam should have burst with a smaller volume of water earlier. If I can't convince myself to refocus my attention I eventually put so much energy into negative-emotion-containment that it leaks out in resentment.

I've had a lot of people who are strong emotion-readers tell me that I make them question their skills, because they can't be sure if I'm fine or upset. If I knew my own tells I would share them with you. I may not have any.

I'm very good at my positive emotions, and I am skilled at choosing words that build up people's confidence in themselves. But I sometimes have trouble being present if I'm distracted by someone's heart. I don't feel feelings in the way that some Fi doms do; instead, I sense that someone's priorities aren't in line with their actions, and I feel the residual vibe of that. I sense their walls or their hollowness or how they've been neglecting attention on a part of their heart. I usually speak up and try to build up their confidence in the part of themselves that they've been neglecting.

I've had the problem of waiting until I'm perfectly calm to express frustration, and it usually has unhelpful repercussions. People don't feel the emotion behind my words, and they think I'm just making a random comment. I'm working on allowing myself to throw a bit of energy at the person because it makes for a more genuine relationship experience.

I like when others respectfully but purposefully push me around a bit to help me deal with my experiences. I need help being present rather than wasting away my energy on negative-emotion-containment, or wasting my attention on how their heart is off-centred (I don't mean to see it, I just perceive their heart neglect, like how you'd notice that someone's skin looked sickly). I'm attracted to people who are present in their emotions because I can follow their lead.
 

SD45T-2

Senior Jr.
Joined
Feb 18, 2012
Messages
4,229
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w2
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
What is the experience/process of repressing them like (or whatever you do with them)?
Try to imagine how the Hoover Dam feels holding back the Colorado River.

You seem to like to hide your personal side; is that a correct perception?
:peepwall:

What makes someone appealing/attractive to you, both romantically & platonically?
Being thoughtful, interesting, kind, having similar values, someone who can broaden my horizons.

How does your wing influence your personality?
I guess I'm more animated than a 1w9.

And your instinctual stack?
I'm a nosy, civic-minded dogooder. :D

What do you hate to be like?
Flakey, incompetent, clueless.

How do you like to be?
Active, productive, thorough.

How do you like to be perceived?
Dependable, respectable, fair.

What's an impression others often have of you that is not accurate and/or is surprising to you in a negative way?
A lot of people seem to think I'm smarter/more capable than I really am. I'm not exactly sure why. I can be articulate at times, and I'm pretty knowledgeable in certain areas, but people seem to extrapolate that and end up projecting abilities that aren't there.

It's pretty stressful when people have unrealistic expectations of what I can do, especially when I try to tell them that I'm in over my head and they respond by saying something like "I know you're a smart guy; I'm sure you'll do just fine". Then they act surprised when I crash and burn. :dry:

What's an impression others often have of you that is surprising in a positive way?
:shrug:

I will ask these as well:
Is anger the emotion you accept as valid the most often?
Probably.

Do you differentiate at all between "feelings" and "emotions"?
Not really, at least not consciously.

Yes, they are different. Generally, emotions are physiological responses & feeling is rational cognition which assigns personal value (ie. significance, importance, etc). Of course, emotion & cognition have no clear line.
:sage:

Do you see your moral obligations or that need to be "perfect" as your feelings or do the two clash?
I'd say that would fall under feelings.

What about other feelings/emotions which may be inappropriate, such as lasciviousness (or whatever)?
What about them? :unsure:

Oh yeah, and sadness for an e4 is a sort of exploration of human feeling which can lead to a greater awareness of self & people in general & what they need/how they work. It's like diving deep in murky water in hopes of finding a pearl. Beauty can come out of it, especially when the e4 is creatively inspired. Or you can drown...
I think I mostly just drown.

I've got ideas, but I don't have much artistic ability, so I can't really do anything with them. They mostly revolve around a sense of abandonment and being deprived of your identity/purpose in life and being unable to find a replacement.
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
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ESTJ
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1w9
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sp/so
[MENTION=6561]OrangeAppled[/MENTION], I will respond to your questions soon!

I've had a lot of people who are strong emotion-readers tell me that I make them question their skills, because they can't be sure if I'm fine or upset.
^ Same for me. Or at least, they can't read the build-up; I make myself VERY clear once, to use your metaphor, the dam bursts. :laugh: My ENFJ friend, who is getting his doctorate in psychology, was especially bewildered by this. Only the people who have known me the longest and who have made a concerted effort to figure me out, can tell when my (extremely long) fuse has been lit.
I'm very good at my positive emotions, and I am skilled at choosing words that build up people's confidence in themselves. But I sometimes have trouble being present if I'm distracted by someone's heart. I don't feel feelings in the way that some Fi doms do; instead, I sense that someone's priorities aren't in line with their actions, and I feel the residual vibe of that. I sense their walls or their hollowness or how they've been neglecting attention on a part of their heart. I usually speak up and try to build up their confidence in the part of themselves that they've been neglecting.
This is very interesting. How do you go about building up their confidence like that?
 

Usehername

On a mission
Joined
May 30, 2007
Messages
3,794
This is very interesting. How do you go about building up their confidence like that?

Verbally. And directly. I'm not very subtle at all. I'm the kind of person that says, "I like you. I like x about you."
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
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ESTJ
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1w9
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sp/so
^ Well, that answers the question :D.

Yes, they are different. Generally, emotions are physiological responses & feeling is rational cognition which assigns personal value (ie. significance, importance, etc). Of course, emotion & cognition have no clear line.
Hm. :huh:
Do you see your moral obligations or that need to be "perfect" as your feelings or do the two clash?
I tend to see those as outside of the feeling realm, because I associate feeling with emotional reactions, and I tend to approach my moral obligations in a pretty straightforward way, unless those obligations are challenged or impeded, or unless someone questions my process -- and then by virtue of explaining it, it sounds emotional. Like trying to explain Fi, there's no way to do it without it sounding flimsy and, yes, illogical -- which I guess makes it feeling-based. So I guess, to answer your question (again, lol), even though it's totally feeling, I tend to make myself see it differently, to legitimize it, because it's so easy for me to de-legitimize feelings.
What about other feelings/emotions which may be inappropriate, such as lasciviousness (or whatever)?
Same thing, really -- which is sad. With lasciviousness (great word!), for example, I am dangerously good at repressing my feelings about guys if I don't consider them to be in my league. It's a problem. :doh:
Oh yeah, and sadness for an e4 is a sort of exploration of human feeling which can lead to a greater awareness of self & people in general & what they need/how they work. It's like diving deep in murky water in hopes of finding a pearl. Beauty can come out of it, especially when the e4 is creatively inspired. Or you can drown...
Like SD45T-2, I tend to drown, almost exclusively. It's probably that we as Ones have a very limited ability to access the positive characteristics of 4s. (Or it's just me and him; my mom's a 1w2 and she loves savoring sadness, e.g. in movies, or when playing the INFJ martyr after a bad day.)
Verbally. And directly. I'm not very subtle at all. I'm the kind of person that says, "I like you. I like x about you."
:yesss: That's awesome. Reminds me so much of my INTJ roommate from last year. She's a 1w9, and whenever she complimented people, she would do so in exactly the manner you described: deadpan and straightforward as hell. I have no idea whether her motivation for that was as benevolent and well-formed as yours, or whether there was a philosophy behind it -- but she definitely gave excellent compliments.
 

SD45T-2

Senior Jr.
Joined
Feb 18, 2012
Messages
4,229
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ESTJ
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1w2
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so/sp
Like SD45T-2, I tend to drown, almost exclusively. It's probably that we as Ones have a very limited ability to access the positive characteristics of 4s. (Or it's just me and him; my mom's a 1w2 and she loves savoring sadness, e.g. in movies, or when playing the INFJ martyr after a bad day.)
As I mentioned earlier, part of the problem is that I have very little artistic talent, so I don't really have a creative outlet.
 

Savitri

New member
Joined
Aug 15, 2012
Messages
88
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
How do you deal with your feelings, emotions & desires?

I'm not sure I do. I'm still trying to consciously allow myself to deal with it (feel it) instead of rationalizing it away or finding it too trivial for me to entertain.

What is the experience/process of repressing them like (or whatever you do with them)?

It's different depending on what I'm repressing. One thing is common though, when there's a leak, there will be a flood.

When & how do you ever act on them?

When I find it beneficial to an objective. Meaning, if the ends justifies the means....


What convinces you that your own feelings, emotions and/or desires are valid or not problematic?

What do you mean?

How does one get you to talk more openly of yourself?


No one gets me to talk more openly about myself. I decide when its time and I don't think I have a guideline for that.

You seem to like to hide your personal side; is that a correct perception?

Other people's perception is that I am hiding. To me, I'm wide open.


What makes someone appealing/attractive to you, both romantically & platonically?


People with passion and determination. "Against all odds," type of spirit.

How does your wing influence your personality?

I believe it makes me a bit withdrawn and most conflicts too petty to play with. Sometimes I feel too apathetic of people's troubles.

And your instinctual stack?

I'm quite observant of my environment. I can quickly assess a group and my position in it. I know its flaws and strengths and have the ability to rearrange them to maximize their potential. I analyze my influence in it and be able to see how much of myself is needed.

What do you hate to be like?

I don't think it's possible for me to ever be like something I hate.

How do you like to be?


A more self-aware individual.

How do you like to be perceived?

People can perceive me any way they want, it doesn't matter to me.

What's an impression others often have of you that is not accurate and/or is surprising to you in a negative way?


Arrogant and insensitive.

What's an impression others often have of you that is surprising in a positive way?

"You're actually quite nice." It's surprising because of what people typically perceive of me before they even have a conversation with me pass "hello, how was your day." lol
 

Mal12345

Permabanned
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14,532
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I wrote this giant reply... and then it was maintenance time, and it deleted the entire thing. So! Another try, but briefer this time -- and feel free to ask follow-up questions if my answers are too general/vague to make sense.

When a post fails at maintenance time, don't do anything with that browser window for a half hour. Then press refresh. If it still doesn't go, wait another minute or two. Because your message is not lost, it's just cached. But if you wait too long (like 12 hours or so), it will vanish into cyberspace.
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
Staff member
Joined
May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
MBTI Type
INFJ
:hi:

How do you deal with your feelings, emotions & desires?
For some reason, that's hard to answer. I guess most things take some time to boil around till they seem more clear to me. Once I'm at that stage, verbalizing them to someone else helps me to sort out what's important from what is not and how much weight to give to each thing. Mostly I am focussed on whether or not verbalizing will achieve the ultimate outcome that matters to me. If I don't think it will, I probably won't bother.

What is the experience/process of repressing them like (or whatever you do with them)?
I don't think I repress a lot of things. I just don't always act on them. When I am angry, it takes me awhile to decide what it is that is bothering me, is it part of a larger pattern with the other person, are there factors on my part (tired, emotionally drained etc) and so on. Usually I don't speak right when I should because it's only something small that triggers that kind of anger, but then I realize that it's attached to a whole other network of other things. It's hard to decide when I can just deal with something (I want to seem reasonable, not overly emotional and not nitpicky) and when that thing is going to tip the balances to a place where the thing needs dealing with, but by then there is a lot of emotion in my voice or body language. If there's no way to deal with it directly with the person, I need some kind of outlet to talk aboiut it or it's like a kettle full of steam with the hole covered up. I find it intensely embarrassing to have the emotional dam break in front of people, rather than letting it out in a controlled way or in an appropiate place at an appropriate time. Sometimes I'm unaware of how much something is bothering me until it's too late to control though.

When & how do you ever act on them?
What convinces you that your own feelings, emotions and/or desires are valid or not problematic?
Sometimes I need to just let things simmer for a bit until they fall into place and the action I should take is clearl. Sometimes talking about it with someone I trust helps me decide whether I am going overboard, or whether my perceptions were accurate. I think as I've gotten older I've learned that if you are going to be non-bland, some people will like you more and some will like you less. You can't be everything to everyone (which I used to want to be). I've also seen there is some value in conflict as long as it is pursued in the right way. I'm trying to become more proactive instead of just avoiding the situation and dealing with it internally (sometimes the dam bursts when the pressure is too much and that never works out well). Only people I am really not invested in or people I am extremely close to usually will hear the negative stuff about them. I find conflict with those in the middle more difficult.

How does one get you to talk more openly of yourself?
Show and interest and ask questions. If someone doesn't, I will assume they don't want to know, especially if I've thrown something out there and they don't follow up on it. Be careful not to laugh at or be too challenging initially of something that I volunteer or that matters to me. Look for common ground first before branching out to areas of discord.

You seem to like to hide your personal side; is that a correct perception?
I don't think so - to me I seem pretty open. Others might perceive me that way though, as I will only open up if someone genuinely wants to know.

What makes someone appealing/attractive to you, both romantically & platonically?
I like curiosity, someone who can discuss ideas, someone who is always looking to improve and grow, and usually someone who initiates more than I naturally do. Someone who has integrity and is not waiting for someone to make their life begin.

How does your wing influence your personality?
From what I can tell, I'm a 1w2. Probably the 2 softens up the crusaderness of the 1. I get a lot of pleasure from being able to help people around me in a way that's useful to them.

And your instinctual stack?
I'm so/sx. I think it makes human systems and people very interesting to me. I need time to recharge but get kind of wilty without meaningful human contact on a very regular basis. I have a compulsion to figure out what makes people tick. I think I'm pretty good at reading what's going on in a group quickly and what everyone's roles are. I think I'm also good at taking a more or less prominent role in a group as needed. The STJs in my life are aware of physical details around them that I would never notice. I believe I do the same, but in an social/emotional sense.

What do you hate to be like?
I'm not quite sure what you mean. I don't want to be hypocritical or asking anything of someone that I wouldn't do myself. Not really sure what else - would need a more specific question.

How do you like to be?
In what sense?

How do you like to be perceived?
Someone who is trustworthy and keeps their word. Competant. Useful. Interesting.

What's an impression others often have of you that is not accurate and/or is surprising to you in a negative way?
Many people who don't know me well often assume I'm blandly "nice" or that I'm shy. I don't like this because it isn't accurate. How I act usually depends on my comfort level. I like to know what to expect first before I interact and sometimes that takes a little while.

I think that some people also assume that because I am Christian I might be naive or easily shocked. It's funny to me, but I think it's also a little patronizing because it is built on an incorrect stereotype.

I don't know if this is negative really, but I also find that people have wildly differing opinions of what I am like and often assume that I hold the same belief system as them. I think this mostly comes from not making judgements right away (even if I do have opinions) and asking a lot of questions to gather context to understand their point of view. It kind of makes me laugh to have one group of people perceive me as an anarchist, another as a hippy and another as a sweet goody two shoes. None are really accurate.


What's an impression others often have of you that is surprising in a positive way?
I don't know - often people aren't as likely to share positive impressions. Most anything that has come up isn't too surprising to me. It is interesting to know if the person I think I am putting out there is the same person as other people perceive they are meeting.

Answer as many/few as you'd like.
.
 

Savitri

New member
Joined
Aug 15, 2012
Messages
88
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ENTJ
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1w9
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
[MENTION=7111]fidelia[/MENTION]
I'm so/sx. I think it makes human systems and people very interesting to me. I need time to recharge but get kind of wilty without meaningful human contact on a very regular basis. I have a compulsion to figure out what makes people tick. I think I'm pretty good at reading what's going on in a group quickly and what everyone's roles are. I think I'm also good at taking a more or less prominent role in a group as needed.

Could so/sx be generalized as people watchers? I seem to be attracted to group dynamics and such and often find myself studying a particular environment before I join it. For some time, I thought I was a Fe-user because of this and soon realized that I was only defining the function narrowly. Now I'm under the assumption that it has to do something with my instincts.
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
Staff member
Joined
May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
MBTI Type
INFJ
I don't have a big enough control group, but from what I've seen here, I'd say yes, definitely!

I was surprised when I first came here to discover that not all INFJs liked as much people contact as I did. It appears that it is largely due to many of them being sp first. Several people suggested I seemed too extraverted to be INFJ and that maybe I was ENFJ. However, after getting more familiar with several ENFJs, I have to say that the difference is so first, as I do not really match the ENFJ profile.
 

SilkRoad

Lay the coin on my tongue
Joined
May 26, 2009
Messages
3,932
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I don't have a big enough control group, but from what I've seen here, I'd say yes, definitely!

I was surprised when I first came here to discover that not all INFJs liked as much people contact as I did. It appears that it is largely due to many of them being sp first. Several people suggested I seemed too extraverted to be INFJ and that maybe I was ENFJ. However, after getting more familiar with several ENFJs, I have to say that the difference is so first, as I do not really match the ENFJ profile.

I don't know... I'm pretty sure I'm sp-first (that's usually how I test) but I need a fair amount of people contact and like you, it seems to be considerably more than with a lot of other INFJs. Sometimes I think that's just what I'm conditioned to, but I do seem to need it. Although...what I REALLY need is to know that people are out there thinking about me and caring about me - I'm not so concerned about having them physically around as much of the time.

I feel like for me the sp-first manifests more in terms of feeling "emotionally unsafe" with a lot of people and in a lot of situations, and worrying about physical safety a fair amount, too. But this surely manifests itself different with a 6 and with a 1. I've also heard that 6s tend to be more "ambivert" and that actually fits me quite well. I have a hard time convincing many people that I'm an introvert, but I'm convinced that I am, in terms of where I recoup my energy, etc. But I'm certainly not extremely introverted.

Sorry, I guess I just barged into a 1 thread. :blush: but the thing about sp-first interested me. I'm not sure about instinctual variant but a lot of the heavily introverted INFJs seems to be 4s or 5s. (though I think a lot of 4 and 5 INFJs mistype themselves, but that's one of my personal things that I've got a bee in my bonnet over.)
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
^ Thanks for the contributions, SilkRoad! You didn't barge into the thread. :hug:

FWIW, the most introverted INFJ I know is either a 1w9 or a 9w1. She's very silent and dutiful; a perfect day for her would be spent alone at a library, reading books in Greek and Latin. (Those crazy Classics majors!)
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Update: I just figured out that yes, I was right the first time when I thought I was so/sp. :doh: They're still close, but social wins out. So let me re-answer the question of how my instinctual stack influences me:

I think being so/sp strengthens my 2 wing, a bit. It makes me pretty gossipy. :laugh: I'm always curious about people's lives, interpersonal dynamics, etc. But at the same time, it makes me retreat into myself whenever I'm not comfortable, or whenever a situation is unhealthy, unsafe, etc-- unless, of course, the Greater Good requires that I not think of myself, or if I care so much about someone that I have to think of them instead, etc.

Because I have these traits and because I'm a 1w2, I have always had a strong, personal, pseudo-journalistic curiosity about people, cultures, and humanity in general, not just because I find them fascinating, but because they are quite simply the focus of my world. It explains my academic interests (psychology, history, sociology); I see their problems and I want to study them, and even though -- since they're ingrained, for the most part -- most of them are unfixable, I want to fix things in the area that is the most annoyingly broken and within my fixing abilities. It also explains why I'm so prone towards treating people like academic interests; I analyze them constantly, to try to figure them out, and even though that makes me grow closer to them, it also maintains my distance. (See: lack of Sx.)
 
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