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[Type 6] Difference between 6w7 and 7w6?

Boo

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I have a friend who makes fun of me for two main characteristics of my shopping habits:
1. I don't wear neutrals. Like I don't remember the last time I wore a white or gray shirt.
2. I notice cute things that she completely misses and know what it would match with like BOOM.
"OOH, this looks cute!" -grabs a skirt from a shelf slightly higher than my head-
"...how did you even see that?"

Wha, I thought we settled on 3, 6, and are fuzzy on the stacking.
Exactly, 'cept I love to wear greys and blacks if it's sophisticated enough.

Well yes I am still stuck on stackings (just when I thought I was sx/so) but I noticed we're talking about a lot of things aside from that :3
 

Thalassa

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There was this one guy who wouldn't even talk to me while I was chubby and then about 4 years later he said "Hey you're kinda pretty." :| I mean I was proud but I felt sorry for my chubby self.
Sometimes I feel like I have to be attractive because of my family. They're all freaking supermodels and if I don't measure up I'm afraid I'll be kind of an embarrassment. This also applies to my academic desires. Compared to my family I feel like a failure, which could be why I worry so much.

Dude, my mom was hot until she was like 45, when I was a teenager guys would go "OMGZ THATS YOUR MOM." Errr...yes.

Okay, so check it out, there was this guy who used to pick on me when I was 13 and awkward, I totally had a crush on him in 8th grade he was a football player...and when I was 19 and an exotic dancer, he ran into me in a convenience store one night, didn't recognize me I guess, followed me in his car, pulled up beside me, motioned for me to roll down my window, and said "hey baby where are you going?" and that kind of blah blah blah...and I said do you not recognize me? And I could tell by his face he didn't. And I screamed my full name really loud and drove away super fast.

But I went through a chubby phase after I split with my ESFJ ex as an adult because I was depressed and also went through this phase of not wanting men to look at me or talk to me, but when I started coming out of it I started realizing with profound shock how differently I was being treated by the entire world. It was a slap in the face to someone who was usually considered "a hot girl" even if I don't qualify as beautiful.

I feel better when I'm thinner, anyway. I feel better both physically and mentally, so it's just as much about my health and self-esteem as the sexy.
 

Boo

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I care even more with my boyfriend. x3 If he says I'm the best at something and means it, it's one of the most rewarding feelings evarrr. If I disappoint him I kind of explode in shame.

The only time I brag shamelessly is either to my mother or my boyfriend.
 

Nomenclature

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I care even more with my boyfriend. x3 If he says I'm the best at something and means it, it's one of the most rewarding feelings evarrr. If I disappoint him I kind of explode in shame.

Hah, some performance anxiety before your first time, much?
 

Boo

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Hah, some performance anxiety before your first time, much?
Yeahz :| And I'll take a look at his ex-girlfriend or flings to make sure I'm ahead... I can be quite the creeper...
Actually because I focus so much on my intimate relations, I thought I would be an sx.
 

CzeCze

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Same here - got professionally tested.

I think 7s may be more into constantly having to be in motion and doing things.

Exactly. I've been in motion since birth and always looking for adventure and to experience things. My mom swears I was fighting against my eyelids and trying to open my eyes when I was born and I started walking (more running) an early age. I would literally run ahead and away from her and I got lost 2x as a toddler. Once when I was 3 I wouldn't hold still for a haircut so my mom sat me on a chair to wait while she got her haircut and then discovered I had escaped into a preschool/kindergarten class. I was big for my age and walked in like I belonged there so the teachers didn't bat an eye. My mom said when she stuck her head in and saw me she kept motioning for me to come to her but I looked at her then slightly annoyed and looked away because I was listening intently to whatever story the teachers were telling me. My mom basically says I drove her nuts as a kid and she not only dropped the baby weigh fast but she became 'like a skeleton' because I was always running her ragged. When I was an older child I would still eat with a sense of urgency and run out of the house to play - I was always "busy".

Even now people who know me describe me as being in motion, keeping things moving, searching, etc. For my birthday I planned an impromptu trip to Spain within a span of about 10 days and I did a homestay for a month and did a crash course in Spanish. I had never been to Europe or travelled abroad outside of trips home to see my parents and I didn't speak a lick of Spanish. Even with the shitty things that I encountered it was an adventure I thoroughly enjoyed. I WANT ADVENTURE!!??&&&!!

It is a key element of my nature and what motivates me.

At its worst, the 7 seeking turns into itself into meaningless hedonism and addiction and dissatisfaction, anxiety.

Enneagram is about what drives you to and away from things.

and 7 is what?? afraid of boredom? being trapped? not being able to experience all the things you want to experience?

7's on the surface are afraid of boredom.

But really we are afraid of a lack of agency and options.

Which distilled, is basically we are afraid to be utterly alone and forced to be with ourself and alone with our deepest, darkest fears and pain. 4's enjoy melancholy and it becomes a part of their personality and takes on a romantic, artistic focus and quality. I myself reject the idea that suffering is a necessary part of the creative process, I think that's bull, I think creation is a joy and a gift.

Options and the new days gives me hope. 7's are essentially optimistic. 6's are vigilant.

A 7 will reframe, minimize, or ignore or basically escape from a problem if it bothers us too much and the idea of fixing it or dealing with it fully makes us anxious. A 6 may become pre-occupied or anxious about even a potential problem but will figure out how to either pre-emptively neutralize it, safely have it pass it, or be prepared for a battle with all the possible scenarios worked out.

The difference between a 7w8 and a counterphobic 7w6 is that 8 is a RAGE/GUT center, while 6 and 7 are about THINKING. 8 instinctively is full and sure of itself and gets enraged that someone is challenging it (think Gordon Ramsey a la Hell's Kitchen). An 8 doesn't think or prepare for possible bad guys, it's like a bull who lunges at its target as soon as it sees it but doesn't think anticipate its prey. An 8 gets pissed off someone is in their face and says "F*CK YOU!" There's lots of yelling and theatrics or basically performance that you can observe.

A 6 is more like the paranoid survivalist hunter who knows the landscape is dotted with enemies and draws a map with and maybe builds a neato long range gun to snipe enemies at a distance then maybe yells for good measure, "F*CK YOU - YOU'RE NOT GONNA GET ME TODAY' before scurrying back to their giant stockpile of cans in a post-apocolyptic world. If that makes sense. Dale Gribble from 'King of the Hill' is a poster child for (hysterically paranoid) 6/5's.

An 8 acts and reacts. A 6, even a counterphobic 6 *anticipates*.

6's worry more about security and also the health of the group they belong to. The group is part of their identity.

A 7's scope is more global.

A 7 feels like 'I make things happen, I can find things, experience things, make things' etc.

A 6 is more 'anything can happen to me, people can bother me, disasters can strike, I must be ready because nothing is gonna get one over on me'

I think those are accurate ^^

The question to being 7w6 or 6w7 is which part is stronger in how you identify and what primarily motivates you, also what resonates most with your nature.

I can be hella counter/phobic and vigilant but I'm essentially 7 all day, every day.
 

Thalassa

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Yeahz :| And I'll take a look at his ex-girlfriend or flings to make sure I'm ahead... I can be quite the creeper...
Actually because I focus so much on my intimate relations, I thought I would be an sx.

Relax all ENFPs are creepers.

You might be sx if your bf affects you that strongly, especially if it's a common theme in your life, I dunno how old you are.
 

Speed Gavroche

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6w7s are rock star/superstar too. And not in a minor way. The Sexual variant of 6w7 is clearly the realm of rockstars, and globally, the rock star thing is more Sx-related than enneatype related. Ozzy Osbourne, Axl Rose, Dennis Rodman (who can't be considered as a simple athlete), Amy Winehouse, Lady Gaga, are true 6w7: paranoid, reactive, loyal, navigate between conformism and pure rebellion, eccentric, self-destructive, emotionally fragile and frustrated. There's also 6w7 So/Sx rockstars like Nina Hagen or Lilly Allen, they are softer. 7w6 rockstar are Robert Plant, Serge Gainsbourg, Freddy Mercury, Elton John, Bono, Cindy Lauper or Billy Joe Armstrong. Emotionaly more sane, very mentals but not paranoid and fundamentaly optimistic at the point to be naive.

7w6s have strong issues with addiction too, but I think that they come from pleasure to pleasure doing that while 6w7s come from a truly negative vison of the world and a feeling of insecurity. One of the main difference is that for 7w6, Rock'n Roll and pop music are simply a pleasure, while for 6w7s rockstars, rock'n roll and pop music are a lifestyle with their codes that they make their duty to exeriment as far as possible. It is a cause that they embrace. Also 6w7s popstars tend to rely a lot on show buisness as a supportive system that it is their duty to work daily for, like Katty Perry or Kanye West and at the same time worry a lot about proving that they are "not just a selling product", Kylie Minogue shows that a lot. While 7w6s are simply optimistic or simply trust their genius to prove their value.

Politics is a strong point to. 7w6s are usually humanist who believe that humanity is ultimately good, and don't want to rely too much on an ideology or political organisation. 6w7 are very more woryng and opinated on political issues, they tend strongly to be partisan and critical, or even -especially for So first and second- acerb, provocative and ideologically ferocious relating a lot on a sense of identity about their political side, seeing mebers of the opppsite side as ennemies. Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter are extreme examples of that, though most part of 6w7 have a connecition to 9 wich lead them to consider every point of view, and tend more to be loyal skeptic than dogmatic crusader. On humour, 6w7s are more politically oriented, while 7w6s are more on the edge of humor for the sake of humor. Compare Chris Rock (6w7) with Jack Black (7w6) for example.
 

Thalassa

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Yeah I very much relate to what you say about 6w7, Speed (you're so good at this!)

And CzeCze would wear me out, no lie.
 

Boo

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I'm 16 years of age :] Whenever I do have a guy in my life I tend to focus too much on them... I'm not sure if it's a teen thing or what. Eventually some couples just burn out but not us... not ever.

Lawls, as a little girl I wore my parents out constantly. I'd run around like a maniac and I had all this crazed energy which I'm pretty sure still resides but since I don't have much to do I just resort to being lazy. 7s remind me of Geminis (my zodiac sign) which I identify with strongly, except the part that they're more logical.

This may sound contradictory but when I worry I think I do it for a source of entertainment or because my mind is sort of like a dumpster. I know that deep down I know there's going to be a tomorrow and "somehow everything will work out." Why I pester people with "why," "how," and "are you sure" is kind of beyond me. Am I really worried or am I worrying only externally? The only things that truly freak me out are death and outer space. My future also seems a bit fogged so I worry about that, and other times I'll tell myself to quit fretting because "if I can envision my future that's what it'll be."
 

Thalassa

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I'm 16 years of age :] Whenever I do have a guy in my life I tend to focus too much on them... I'm not sure if it's a teen thing or what. Eventually some couples just burn out but not us... not ever.

Lawls, as a little girl I wore my parents out constantly. I'd run around like a maniac and I had all this crazed energy which I'm pretty sure still resides but since I don't have much to do I just resort to being lazy. 7s remind me of Geminis (my zodiac sign) which I identify with strongly, except the part that they're more logical.

This may sound contradictory but when I worry I think I do it for a source of entertainment or because my mind is sort of like a dumpster. I know that deep down I know there's going to be a tomorrow and "somehow everything will work out." Why I pester people with "why," "how," and "are you sure" is kind of beyond me. Am I really worried or am I worrying only externally? The only things that truly freak me out are death and outer space. My future also seems a bit fogged so I worry about that, and other times I'll tell myself to quit fretting because "if I can envision my future that's what it'll be."

You can't envision the future, you might find this both a relief and a disappointment. It isn't a sign. Young NFs often have ludicrous ideas about this sort of thing (I did). Your future isn't necessarily going to be what you imagine. It's okay to imagine the possibilities, it's not necessarily going to happen, learn that now and you'll be better off than me.

I wasn't at all concerned with success or achievement like you are when I was a teenager. All I cared about were my friends, my boyfriend, and I knew I wanted to move out west even then. I was a mediocre student, even though I loved to read in my free time and did really well in subjects I cared about (otherwise I just wouldn't do my homework, like I just flaked it, I also skipped classes). I knew that nothing could hold me back from seeing the world, that's all I wanted. I wanted to see and experience things. When I was sixteen and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I replied "interesting." Being boring and bored was my worst nightmare, being trapped in a small suburban Southern town.
 

Boo

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You can't envision the future, you might find this both a relief and a disappointment. It isn't a sign. Young NFs often have ludicrous ideas about this sort of thing (I did). Your future isn't necessarily going to be what you imagine. It's okay to imagine the possibilities, it's not necessarily going to happen, learn that now and you'll be better off than me.

I wasn't at all concerned with success or achievement like you are when I was a teenager. All I cared about were my friends, my boyfriend, and I knew I wanted to move out west even then. I was a mediocre student, even though I loved to read in my free time and did really well in subjects I cared about (otherwise I just wouldn't do my homework, like I just flaked it, I also skipped classes). I knew that nothing could hold me back from seeing the world, that's all I wanted. I wanted to see and experience things. When I was sixteen and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I replied "interesting." Being boring and bored was my worst nightmare, being trapped in a small suburban Southern town.
Cheesy way to not think about things, I know.

I was the same in 8th grade--I actually got a D- for Science. Shaming the family and myself wasn't something I planned on doing anymore.
 

Lady_X

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so many interesting comments in this thread! i definitely relate to 7 and 6 and sx and boo...i sometimes feel like all my worrying or planning is just busy work for my brain...i seem mellow i think to outsiders but my brain is constantly coming up with ideas and plans to implement them...and it's nuts...it's just busy work...shit i really don't need to be devoting so much mental energy to.
 

Boo

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I find it really hard to say how optimistic I really am... I'm poptimistic xD Because I bounce back and forth between optimism and pessimism. All I know is I want to leave a legacy behind me in some shape or form... if I can't do that then I might as well kick the darn bucket :| What's the point of just... living? Actually if my mom says we have something planned for tomorrow I wake up energetically and ready to DO SOMETHING. For instance, shopping makes my heart soar because I know there are so many things I can buy, opportunities, etc. I like the idea of having options.

Don't 6s and 7s have distinct views on authority? 6s either rebel or latch on to authority whereas 7s just want to do their own thing?
 

Boo

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so many interesting comments in this thread! i definitely relate to 7 and 6 and sx and boo...i sometimes feel like all my worrying or planning is just busy work for my brain...i seem mellow i think to outsiders but my brain is constantly coming up with ideas and plans to implement them...and it's nuts...it's just busy work...shit i really don't need to be devoting so much mental energy to.
Well, personally, I usually worry when I've tried all other outlets for means of escape. My family leaves me home a lot and I have to tell you how much it sucks. I was meant to go outdoors, do something, HELL EVEN HAND ME FREAKING CHORES I WILL DO WHATEVER YOU WANT JUST GIVE ME SOMETHING!!! @___@ Mmkay so when all else fails to keep me preoccupied I worry like a beast. If I watch a documentary about outer space I'll think about meteors smashing into earth and there's no way I can prevent it. And then I'll think about death and I'll slip into a frenzy--"I'LL FIND A WAY TO CURE DEATH! I'LL EARN MONEY SO MUCH MONEY AND I'LL PAY SCIENTISTS ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD TO HELP ME ESCAPE DEATH!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" And if I hear footsteps coming from the backyard it's only a matter of seconds before I call my mom, "MOMMY SOMEONE'S IN THE BACKYARD COME HOME QUICK!"

My boyfriend is kind of like purgative because when I'm with him there is absolutely nothing in this world that can harm me. All my worries just float away for a few hours and I can just focus on him :D With him, I feel like doors open and there are opportunities to do something with someone! I can't go on an adventure alone, there's no fun in that--I need to share moments with at least someone. If not I'll have to brag to the universe of how I alone did went on an amazing escapade triumphantly yadda yadda. When separated (and he's usually doing something fun, I'll tell you that--right now he's in Italy with his best friend while I'm alone) I covet his freedom & happiness. He gets to do everything I can't, and with that he'll always have more opportunities than me. I feel like he's succeeding in a part of life I can't access because I have to stick to home base. :( Distilled waters... reminds me of Ariel from the Little Mermaid lawls :p She wanted to know what it was like on land. S'yeah, I'm a free-spirit that worries as a result from being idle for too long.
 

Thalassa

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I find it really hard to say how optimistic I really am... I'm poptimistic xD Because I bounce back and forth between optimism and pessimism. All I know is I want to leave a legacy behind me in some shape or form... if I can't do that then I might as well kick the darn bucket :| What's the point of just... living? Actually if my mom says we have something planned for tomorrow I wake up energetically and ready to DO SOMETHING. For instance, shopping makes my heart soar because I know there are so many things I can buy, opportunities, etc. I like the idea of having options.

Don't 6s and 7s have distinct views on authority? 6s either rebel or latch on to authority whereas 7s just want to do their own thing?

6s have a pretty extreme relationship to authority, whether it's latching on or rebelling (phobic and counterphobic). I've always been preoccupied with things like authority and government ...supposedly 6s are bent a bit toward politics though I'm sure not all 6s are it's just a manifestation of the personality that's common...and in my personal life I had extremely authoritarian parental figures which at first made me feel very safe and cared for (until about age 12) and then made me feel horribly stifled, caged, and misunderstood. Therefore as an adult I've always had a strange relationship to authority, both strongly resisting it and simutaneously respecting it in various forms.

I can tell you I do not relate to your constant need to do things. That seems almost like you're a 6 disintegrating at 3 maybe? Doing the "human doing" thing? Except when I disintegrate at 3 I just become bossy and achievment focused, like I attempt to get over my fucked up internal state by proving myself dominant or worthy or something. I was never a "human doing."

I'm really glad I'm not in disintegration anymore, ugh.

Do you think maybe you have an anxiety disorder, I mean with all the thoughts about meteors and things?
 

Boo

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Actually I think I figured out where my anxieties stem from.
I don't generally like to take responsibility (not sure if it's immaturity or not) and so I need security, a belief that something or someone else will take care of me and my problems. When that ideal is disturbed I'm very frantic. But that's only my expectations for the outside world. With myself, if I have lost faith in myself, I sort of give up and move towards anxieties over outside problems (so I'm going towards my head fix). Finally I'll be so distressed I'll try to perfect the world around me, seeking answers. If that fails I'll take on my gut fix (I believe 9?) very complacent and withdrawn, and out of no where I'll flame up in rage and anxiety, usually towards people I love or am comfortable with. It's like I don't listen to reason. When I am truly angry I can't control it and just want to argue. But I'll probably the first to apologize. Otherwise I just look and feel very grumpy and would prefer to lay low. When the bad mood lessens I'll just be more shy, and eventually go back to 3 if something inspires me to succeed.
Or maybe just lack of stimulation/things to do, places to go, people to see makes me antsy :p

Hah! Authority... I either love or hate my parents. And my teachers either impress me or repulse me. Whenever I meet adults I either try to bond with them or hate them... Sometimes I won't have a strong emotion towards an adult/authority if I don't know them well or they're boring. But with friends' mothers I like talking to them :) as if they were related to me.
 

Thalassa

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Is this night of the crazies?
 

Asterion

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1. You're a 3.
2. He's right, you're not real, none of us are real, especially him.
3. Fuck you all in a sensual appreciative way, lol.
 
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