Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
i understand what you mean with the top part. i went through weeks of that.

as to externally anxious - i'm actually not that externally anxious, myself. one time i was TERRIFIED before a pretty big music performance and i told my dad, and he laughed - "really? you look so calm!" right. haha. i can put on a good cover. when i don't talk, lol. or when i distract myself with something fun. the anxiety comes out in little ways... sometimes i start talking quickly and i trip over my words, especially with someone like a new boss. or on the opposite end of the spectrum, when i'm really comfortable around people, sometimes i stumble too cause my brain runs way faster than my mouth can keep up, lol. i think you could also notice it in how i am responsive. i adapt quickly to the other's in-the-moment responses to me, adjusting myself to meld better with them. or to counter them, if we are not on good terms. i think milla jovovich shows something similar a bit, actually. she's not particularly fearful-seeming, but you can see how closely she watches dave. calista - i just watched her, cause she would be your stacking - she doesn't seem super anxious to me either. she seems kinda calm. but she "quickens" sometimes.
not to persuade you in any direction though - i know how hard it is.

Thanks for the response. To be candid, I'm having mental health issues and pms right now which I think alters things. My husband says I'm acting very different than usual.
I'm usually depressed, not anxious. I think when a five goes toward seven the mental energy can seem kind of six-ish, because you have the withdrawn mental focus of the five coupled with a draw to external information.

Anyway, thanks again. I'm going outside and getting away from the computer now.