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Thread: Type 9 women

  1. #11
    Senior Member Silent Stars's Avatar
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    Oct 2008


    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    I'm 9w1 and I seem to come off as sort of cold, uptight, and aloof and a bit mousy at first.

    Then once people get to know me, they realize I'm laid back and pretty accepting and I have a good sense of humor, but at the same time have kind of a low tolerance for certain kinds of BS.

    That doesn't make a whole heck of a lot of sense, does it?
    That's exactly how I am.
    Enneagram 9w1 sp/so

  2. #12
    Senior Member hilo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    9 sx


    I've taken the enneagram test probably 4 or 5 times, and gotten a 9 every time but once (I think then I got a 5).

    However, I have not read nearly as much on this theory nor do I really understand it much. I get that it's different (Additional to?) MBTI but I guess I don't quite get how they mesh. I know I'm not supposed to be a 9 from my type (INTP).

    But as I am female, I guess the ways that I see it working is that overall I eschew strong emotions, in myself or others. I try to keep things cool, level-headed, grounded. This is in an interpersonal sense, doesn't mean that I don't experience strong emotions at times. But I never freak out, I'm one of those people that doesn't jump when there is a loud noise. People come to me when the shit is hitting the fan because they know I can come up with a plan, and I don't judge.

    I don't generally like to make people upset or unhappy. Yet, because of my NT obliviousness I sometimes still do. So I could see my 9-ness coming as a result of all the times my mother & others erupted at me as a child for being cold, unfeeling, selfish, etc. when usually I was just distracted internally.

    Or I'm way off and I'm not even a 9. I don't relate well to any of the descriptions really, and my distribution doesn't even make sense. Here's a recent test as example:

    Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||||| 42%
    Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||| 50%
    Type 3 Image Focus |||||||||||||||| 62%
    Type 4 Hypersensitivity |||| 14%
    Type 5 Detachment |||||||||||||| 58%
    Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||||| 42%
    Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||||| 58%
    Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||||||||||| 54%
    Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||||||||||| 82%

    type score type behavior motivation
    9 20 I must maintian a peaceful and easygoing environment to be happy.
    3 15 I must be impressive and attractive to be happy.
    5 14 I must be knowledgable and independent to be happy.
    7 14 I must be high and entertained to be happy.
    8 13 I must be strong and in control to be happy.
    2 12 I must be helpful and caring to be happy.
    1 10 I must be perfect and good to be happy.
    6 10 I must be secure and safe to be happy.
    4 3 I must be true to my emotions to be happy.
    I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
    - Umberto Eco

    INTP e9 (sx/so/sp)
    Ti = Ne (41.3) > Si (31.2) ~ Ni (31.1) ~ Te (30.1) > Se (24.1) >> Fe (21) & Fi (20.1)

  3. #13
    Controlled Mischief StephMC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    9w8 sp/sx


    I'm still new to this theory too, but I relate quite a bit to the 9w8 type. I'm not sure how many other 9s I've met. I suspect an INTP friend is a 9w8 as well. We both hate upsetting people, but I'm going to venture a guess by saying he feels guilty for f'ing up with people more often than me. I beat myself up occasionally, but I don't really feel guilty, perse. It's more like a brief "aw...shit... I could have handled that better.. oh well, I'll just act like it never happened" and I'm done.

    He seems to have more of a superiority complex, too. But the moment people take offense to that he backs down and kinda mumbles off.

    Ugh... yeah, I need to collect more data from other 9s before I can comment more
    I have an inner monologue that sounds strikingly similar to something off Animal Planet.

  4. #14
    Junior Member four's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010


    I know lots of nines, male and female. Almost all of the women in my family are 9s. They have that even, grounded-seeming energy, just as male nines do. When they're not doing so hot, their energy gets more anxious as they go to 6, sometimes extremely anxious and they can become passive aggressive because they aren't great at asserting themselves, or even "knowing" that they are feeling something. They are helpful and kind, but in a less sugary way than 2s can be. This is one of the main differences I see between 2s and 9s, especially if they're females, that energetic difference. Also, in my experience, 9s have a much harder time engaging in emotional conversation. There's a lack of emotional vocabulary, a removal from the heart center (gut vs. heart type) unless the nine really tries to be conscious of it, whereas 2s often engage their own and others emotions quite liberally. Even if they're female, they seem to really struggle with this.

  5. #15


    I'm leaning towards the possibility that I'm a 9w8 sx now, and I'm female. I've always thought 4w5, but it's more the idealized version of me than the real me. What I really relate to-
    Sexual nines can have an intensity that often makes them look fourish. They have the passionate desire to merge with another and can idealize potential partners. They tend to merge with the other readily, losing themselves in relationships and fascination. Nines tendency towards fantasizing can take the role of fantasizing about potential relationships, although being basically indecisive and withdrawn, they tend to stay fantasizing and will avoid any direct action in pursuit of the fantasized object. They can be incredibly shy. When in a relationship, they often suffer from a loss of identity, because they become so absorbed in the other person.
    I do this way too much. It's not just relationships, though- it can be musicians, film directors, writers that I identify with or wish I was more like- those with more 4w5 tendencies. Then I find myself merging with their personas, and then I tend to lose myself, not sure what's me, what's what I want to be, what's them. Typically, this is all in my head, not something others see much of at all. I keep it very hidden.

    Oftentimes I don't feel like I have much in the way of ideas of my own, I just ride the current, hoping people won't ask me what I want to do, because I don't know. Just propose something to me and then I'll know whether it sounds good or not. I can keep going like this for a long time, and then all of a sudden I'll get all resentful that we never do what I want to do.

    As far as the 8 goes, I see that come out when I engage in sports especially. I can become incredibly aggressive and competitive. It always surprises people, because typically I am very passive, almost zen, and then out of nowhere I'm throwing the tennis racket and yelling, etc. For this reason I often avoid things which bring out this side because it takes me by surprise, too, and I don't know how to deal with it. I don't like to feel stress or anxiety. For this reason I am a bit of a hermit. I see very little of the one in me, but it, like the eight, can spring up out of nowhere- I can get a little self-righteous and overly principled, which shocks me even more than the eight, because typically I am about as non-judgmental and accepting as you can get.

    Also, I oscillate between being conciliatory and complacent and rebellious and assertive.

    No one would ever take me for a 2 or 6. I think I often present as a four or a five, sometimes a seven. I think many would see 9 as being too milque-toasty to be me, but those who would think that are fours and fives and sevens, and when I'm with them I behave more like that. I often feel like a shape-shifter, like some sort of transmutable substance.

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