• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

[Traditional Enneagram] Escaping the rat race

Spectre

New member
Joined
Nov 22, 2017
Messages
104
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
This music seems fitting when quitting the rat race, especially if you do so by retiring.
YouTube
The character did retire also, so it is not strange.
 

Bush

cute lil war dog
Joined
Nov 18, 2008
Messages
5,182
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
The way out is through.

Truth. So much truth.

I'm a fan of doing the hard work upfront so that you can work on your own terms from then on.

That's the ideal, anyway.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
Staff member
Joined
Apr 18, 2010
Messages
27,230
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Truth. So much truth.

I'm a fan of doing the hard work upfront so that you can work on your own terms from then on.

That's the ideal, anyway.
Still waiting for that.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I take it you are quite an agreeable person and are disappointed with others lack of said trait? Requiring a perfect man seems awfully cruel, demanding him to be something he cannot be(since we are all inherently flawed)

Im not, actually. I have no (longer) a problem with conflict.

I do have a problem with high school like behaviour in a team as it kills motivation and productivity - which in turn brings out my conflict invoking and also murderous side.
I have little to no patience regarding agenda pushing, power abuse and socially punishing techniques like gossip, gaslighting and plain bullying.

I also dont require the perfect man - just a perfect man for ME. Which ive found - he accepts me and doesnt go nuts over my flaws and i am the same with him.

Ive been looking for a job with the same criteria. When i finally found it, it got taken over after 3 months and turned into everything i was trying to stay clear of.

So, i guess i ll have to create the next one myself ;)
 

Spectre

New member
Joined
Nov 22, 2017
Messages
104
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
Im not, actually. I have no (longer) a problem with conflict.

I do have a problem with high school like behaviour in a team as it kills motivation and productivity - which in turn brings out my conflict invoking and also murderous side.
I have little to no patience regarding agenda pushing, power abuse and socially punishing techniques like gossip, gaslighting and plain bullying.

I also dont require the perfect man - just a perfect man for ME. Which ive found - he accepts me and doesnt go nuts over my flaws and i am the same with him.

Ive been looking for a job with the same criteria. When i finally found it, it got taken over after 3 months and turned into everything i was trying to stay clear of.

So, i guess i ll have to create the next one myself ;)

I wish you good luck with your job situation.
 

xenaprincess

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 7, 2011
Messages
5,192
MBTI Type
infp
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I have mixed feelings about the 'rat race' or working for others.

I enjoy doing the work, most of the time. I don't enjoy dealing with clients who are stressed out and don't know where to put their stress except on me. They vent at me, or blame me or doubt me. I realized only recently that I don't present myself with enough confidence or ease, and that probably has a huge effect on how clients view me. I can't relate how many accusatory emails I've gotten. It is not normal.

I don't like how clients get so obsessed about getting the most out of their money. I've watched people try to squeeze contractors and want more and more, without having to pay anything. My last client would bargain with contractors and question their costs. ("How can XYZ cost $200? Does that guy spend six hours doing the work?" Meanwhile the electrician or plumber or whatever has to justify that cost. It is the cost of doing business!!)

Then when things happen (minor mistakes), the contractor has to eat the cost, with no other payment to cover the expense, so the contractor is essentially paying for the client's house. It makes me kind of sick.

So...I like the work, just not the people I do the work for. I don't mind it enough to want to go to an island. I think if I were to retire, I'd get very bored.
 

Spectre

New member
Joined
Nov 22, 2017
Messages
104
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
I have mixed feelings about the 'rat race' or working for others.

I enjoy doing the work, most of the time. I don't enjoy dealing with clients who are stressed out and don't know where to put their stress except on me. They vent at me, or blame me or doubt me. I realized only recently that I don't present myself with enough confidence or ease, and that probably has a huge effect on how clients view me. I can't relate how many accusatory emails I've gotten. It is not normal.

I don't like how clients get so obsessed about getting the most out of their money. I've watched people try to squeeze contractors and want more and more, without having to pay anything. My last client would bargain with contractors and question their costs. ("How can XYZ cost $200? Does that guy spend six hours doing the work?" Meanwhile the electrician or plumber or whatever has to justify that cost. It is the cost of doing business!!)

Then when things happen (minor mistakes), the contractor has to eat the cost, with no other payment to cover the expense, so the contractor is essentially paying for the client's house. It makes me kind of sick.

So...I like the work, just not the people I do the work for. I don't mind it enough to want to go to an island. I think if I were to retire, I'd get very bored.

The bolded part seems to be a bit of a hallmark of the era, at least where I live. People want it all, done really fast, but they certainly don´t want to pay for it. Sigh...
 

Lark

Active member
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
29,569
Actively oppose it as a 4 sx, myself.
And actively working on escaping this bullshit and instead marching to the beat of my own drum - now with extra meaning!

Me too, for a while I thought if I was independently wealthy I'd carry on working at what I'm working at, maybe with increased flexibility or something but now I dont think so anymore.
 

Lark

Active member
Joined
Jun 21, 2009
Messages
29,569
The bolded part seems to be a bit of a hallmark of the era, at least where I live. People want it all, done really fast, but they certainly don´t want to pay for it. Sigh...

I've seen that in the UK too, the cheapening of public services, deskilling and scaling back, I think its part of the Corilla scandal because that was entirely cost driven.

Though I think there's something about that pricing and costing mentality which is cheapening things, it is one which really and truly does not value what is for sale in the first place or does not value the end point consumer and most of the operational staff who directly interface with them are devalued by association.

Years back I remember pundits talking about how there was an issue with the celebration of wealth but not the means of getting it, so there were lots of kids who expected to get rich over night and became resentful and wouldnt turn up for work when that didnt happen, now I think there's been a further development on that, people want to make money but they dont care how, its why you get all these stories about companies reporting record profits when they are failing to do a good job or provide a good service to anyone, shorting in the financial sector is an example of it, I'm not sure you can call it corruption because it business as usual.
 

Bush

cute lil war dog
Joined
Nov 18, 2008
Messages
5,182
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Our business won a startup competition. Our existence hinged on a patent getting granted, which is difficult to get through, but we'd been collaborating with a national chain that was helping push it. When we incorporated, the chain claimed they owned the patent and did a 180, and then out-lawyered us. The thing was blocked and neither party got it, so it was a lose-lose. We weren't in competition, and our group wasn't out to betray, but that's how they saw it. We absolutely did have a tangible product, but they were more of a user of the product than a stakeholder.

You want to file a patent? You gotta have a lawyer. Your patent gets blocked by another party? Lawyer. You want to check on the status of your own patent in the system? For some reason, you need a lawyer to even do that. For them, it was a drop in the bucket. For us, it was most of our capital. So.. we called it quits. (eta: one possible outcome we were shooting for was for them to buy us out, which may have cost even less than they'd spent on all of that.)

It was a huge pain in the ass. Too volatile. Less meritocratic than I'd like. Never again.

Since I was 18, my endgame had been to become an independent contractor. I deviated because of that opportunity, but I'm back on my original path. Right now, my primary gig is at one company, but for just enough hours to get benefits so that I have time for my little side ventures.
 

Spectre

New member
Joined
Nov 22, 2017
Messages
104
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
I've seen that in the UK too, the cheapening of public services, deskilling and scaling back, I think its part of the Corilla scandal because that was entirely cost driven.

Though I think there's something about that pricing and costing mentality which is cheapening things, it is one which really and truly does not value what is for sale in the first place or does not value the end point consumer and most of the operational staff who directly interface with them are devalued by association.

Years back I remember pundits talking about how there was an issue with the celebration of wealth but not the means of getting it, so there were lots of kids who expected to get rich over night and became resentful and wouldnt turn up for work when that didnt happen, now I think there's been a further development on that, people want to make money but they dont care how, its why you get all these stories about companies reporting record profits when they are failing to do a good job or provide a good service to anyone, shorting in the financial sector is an example of it, I'm not sure you can call it corruption because it business as usual.

Hmmm

Could it be that the culprit is a short time reference. I mean cheap but crappy things do cost in the long run. Just a thought.
 

Jhubb

New member
Joined
Aug 2, 2018
Messages
1
I'm a 4w5 (almost positive), and over the years I have somehow managed to pivot out of the rat race, if you will, if not escape it entirely. I do work a day job, which I find purposeful for the most part, but I don't like or appreciate American cultural priorities like wealth, consumerism, stock portfolios, sidehacks, etc. I find it all human noise. I've tried for the last several years to simplify my life in terms of possessions and re-visit my priorities (relationships, making the world a little better place, staying in the present and reminding myself I only have this One life, so I try to spend "at the banquet" of natural beauty and friendship and solitude. Which is a pretty privileged place, if I'm honest. It took time to cultivate and I'm still not the dirty hippy I'd like to be 😉
 

Chad of the OttomanEmpire

Give me a fourth dot.
Joined
Jun 9, 2013
Messages
1,053
MBTI Type
NeTi
Enneagram
478
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
What is the "rat race" exactly? Like a 9-5 job? Or more in the sense of working all the time to acquire more wealth and position? Because the vast majority of people, especially of my generation, don't have much choice BUT to work some crap job, 9-5, (if not several others) just to make ends meet.

I have managed to escape it for the time--this revolved around teaching English in other countries; living minimally and saving to travel; the death of my father and being able to live off meagre amounts of inheritance; and going back to school.

I fear to think of the future though, where I will have to start working full time (perhaps more than full time) if I ever want to retire...if my country even still exists 30 years from now. I'm still trying to find ways to opt out, you know; I have psychiatric issues that make it hard for me to get along with other humans. I'm not sure I even CAN do the 9-5 thing anymore...trying to "get ahead" is out of the question.

But that's how and why it's done in my book.
 
Top