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[Traditional Enneagram] Enneagram 5 and stress

Spectre

New member
Joined
Nov 22, 2017
Messages
104
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
Hello fellow fives.

I am wondering, what stresses you out and how do you deal with said stress?

Personally i get stressed out if i don't have things under control, but i have not found a way to handle it very well...

Thanks beforehand

// Spectre
 

Mal12345

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 19, 2011
Messages
14,532
MBTI Type
IxTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Hello fellow fives.

I am wondering, what stresses you out and how do you deal with said stress?

Personally i get stressed out if i don't have things under control, but i have not found a way to handle it very well...

Thanks beforehand

// Spectre

Yes, but your having things under control is related to your INTJ type. With the enneagram it is more likely to do with one of your tritypes, for example, if one of them is type 1.

So there's more to this. We all have traits existing all over the enneagram. I myself may even have some type 2 traits lurking around in my subconscious mind.

I can't answer your question as generally as you do. Your answer is a general not-having-things-under-control. I tend to be more specific. What stresses me out is a computer that doesn't function right, or some software that is misbehaving that I need to use.
 

Mal12345

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Oh yes, the other question. I deal with it by thinking about something else for a while, or thinking of song lyrics.
 

Spectre

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Nov 22, 2017
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5w4
Oh yes, the other question. I deal with it by thinking about something else for a while, or thinking of song lyrics.

I do have a 1-fix. My tritype is 5-1-4.

By not having things under control means in my case things like when i forget things that are essential, having too vague instructions but being supposed to perform properly.

Chaos which includes other people is another stress-factor.

Another example is making mistakes.

But, when I think of it, you are probably right. It does seem to be a 1-fix behind most of it.

// Spectre
 

Mal12345

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Hopelessly yet rigidly authoritarian ESTJs stress me out. My immune system really does crash at such times. I become more prone to infections of various kinds. But having fibromyalgia also contributes.
 
Joined
Sep 18, 2008
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1,941
MBTI Type
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sp/so
I'm an INTJ 5-1-2. Things that stress me out usually relate to having too much going on around me/too many things to juggle, and the drive of perfectionism. It's usually related to work/study/professional/goal-related issues and what I think I need to be doing. It drove me to anxiety/depression and I withdrew as a response to stress. It took me literally years to climb out of that hole.

It didn't come naturally to me at first, but I've built habits to step outside of the 5 need to withdraw into my head. The first thing that I do is take care of my body. By eating well, working out and getting a good amount of sleep, I center the needs of my body. That's very important because the body and mind are linked. The body disintegrates before the mind, so choosing to withdraw to serve only the needs of the mind, and neglecting the body, feeds into the vicious cycle.

Secondly, I externalise. I make a simple plan, and I take action - doesn't matter if it doesn't seem to have an effect on the bigger picture. Just by taking action, I'm externalising what's in my head, and providing a stimulus to obtain more information. When stressed, I build worlds and huge theories in my head, but don't act on them. Everything feels futile because I'm not taking action and convince myself that my worries will happen, so it's paralysis by analysis. Just by taking action, getting feedback/information, and by talking to people, it expands the range of possibilities that are open.

The third thing I do is require projects to be finished/done, not perfect. There is nothing on earth that is perfect, and if we sacrifice action for perfection, we cannot move forwards. Under these circumstances, things build up, nothing gets done, and I feel more and more stressed because it's never good enough. You set yourself up for failure. I have major projects ranked by priority, broken down into smaller aspects that can be worked on at the same time. I don't allow myself to be sucked into the idea that there's one way of doing things, and am constantly on the lookout for more information so that I can adjust my direction. At the same time, even if things that I've spent a long time on don't work out, I'm still OK with it, since I just consider it an unanticipated part of the price to pay. I clearly separate my sense of identity from what I do. I also take calculated risk and ensure that the price is never too much for me to pay if I fail. This balances my need for self-preservation and control (+tendency to be over-conservative) with the requirement of risk that comes with working on big problems that matter to me.

Not sure if any of this will be helpful for you.
 

Spectre

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Joined
Nov 22, 2017
Messages
104
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
Your text reminded of something i do, that may actually help others.

I have read "Getting things done", and implemented it to a degree in my life. That has certainly helped. In having a sense of control and getting, well, things done.

I also do "victory journaling". I find it to be a great motivator to take action. Its always a treat to see what have been accomplished by the end of the weak.

Perfectionism, its a real pain, I know...
 
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