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[Traditional Enneagram] Advice for a 6?

bekaca

New member
Joined
Jul 30, 2017
Messages
2
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
6
Hello,

I'm new to this and I was wondering if you guys have any advice to give me to get over a bad moment in my life (love related). I don't feel like myself anymore but at the same time I have never felt more at peace, eventhought I'm sad, I am calm-ish (or at least better that I have been in the past) I need advice to let things go. Maybe a light at the end of the tunnel...

I'm a 6 w7 w3

Enneagram has helped me already to understand a bit more the reason I'm in pain and what is making me feel worst.

Thanks in advanced!
 
Joined
Mar 7, 2017
Messages
590
MBTI Type
ISTJ
Enneagram
125
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
I don't feel like I am anyone to give advice to you, but what type of love related issue is it you are having? A bad breakup or someone cheating on you or did your loved one die? A little more information I think would be good for getting fitting advice.
 

bekaca

New member
Joined
Jul 30, 2017
Messages
2
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
6
Hi! Thanks for your answer.

My ex cheated on me and a bad break up combined with the cheating. She didn't regret it, showed no remorse, love for me or at least empathy for my feelings. She was cold, distant and dissmisive. She didn't even allowed me to get my feelings out. I tried anyways. I feel like I'm on the worst side of a 6 at the moment.
I don't hold grudges but It's been really hard. We were living together and had plans for the future (travel together very far away from our country and such). She was my friend before the relationship so It hurts A LOT, more than the cheating, the after cheating. The way she acted.
I've seen that 6s tend to humiliate themselves with the intention of getting protection from the other part..and that's exactly what I did...

I feel better now but still, I need to get my strength back. I used to be a happy person, now I'm just like a balloon with no direction.
 
Joined
Mar 7, 2017
Messages
590
MBTI Type
ISTJ
Enneagram
125
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
I'm sorry for what has been done to you. I can only offer you my sympathies, which might not be worth that much. Must be difficult for you. I am a devout Christian, and I would of course take that approach if I had been in your shoes. If someone cheats on me, they are not worth my time. I would divorce them anyway for their deceit and treachery which really only is allowed in Catholicism if someone cheats on said person. That's if not my love is very deep and requited, and the SO regrets her mistake and views it as such.

There are more fish in the sea, I'm sure you've heard that one before. She doesn't seem like she's worthy of your time if she was that cold and distant. You deserve someone warm and caring. A soulmate that wants to share every living moment with you wether it may be through hardship and poverty or wealth and happiness.

God has a plan for us all and everything happens for some sort of reason, perhaps it was His intent to show you that you are better off alone than to be with a twotiming adulterer that sooner or later will break your heart and never commit to your relationship. I'd rather take the sooner option, but that's me.

I know I haven't offered any real advice based on the principles of enneagram, but as a 6 I would try to find my safety in the Lord. He is always the biggest comfort in my life, and I do feel loved by Him, and that's enough for me. Since I found Catholicism, I haven't had a need for any real safety in my life. I am much more independent now.

Perhaps it is time for you to discover God and religion if you haven't already? Something to think about.

Anyway, I will leave any further advice giving up to the other members of this forum as I am probably the wrong man for the job. I do hope you will feel better soon though. :hug:
 
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