[Traditional Enneagram] How do you feel about your disintegration point?

[Galena]

I feel about 2 no worse than about 1. I can’t really say which has more good or bad to offer me. I can relate to them both enough to envy them for the parts of them that I as just an adjacent type cannot reasonably experience. Either of them may also find me to fall short, making me vulnerable to them because that only turns up the heat on how I value what they both stand for. Wishing to transform into either seems to make them equally disintegrating. Better to learn from them instead - that’s good, but I always want more.

I don’t want this to come off as a message against desire; the idea of making turning that off into a goal doesn’t feel right.