The Great One said:
I also don't have the intensity of an sx first. Plus, sx 6's are pretty damn counter-phobic where I am very phobic.
It also seems like the sx/so 6w7's tend to live their life like they are going to die the next day. They tend to have the "live for the moment" catch phrase. I am not like this at all. I am a very careful person.
I don't know that these things are necessarily true. For one, rumor has it that all sx-doms are "intense", but I don't think that is true in the sense that bright orange is intense. I think it's more true in the sense that deep violet is intense, dark red is intense, pine green is intense. Maybe some sx-doms are magenta on the color wheel, but for others of us, our intensity may manifest more in mental rumination, idealization, and strength of 1-to-1 bonding than in flashy fireworks - an intensity of heaviness instead of one of lightness. If anything characterizes sx accurately, I don't believe it's intensity of persona, but rather intensity of focus on one specific desire. Take the new The Great Gatsby movie that's coming out - the protagonist, Jay Gatsby, most certainly is an sx-first. The intensity of his focus on his idealization is so strong that it transforms his entire life, taking everything in its wake. But while the huge parties that he has unflaggingly encouraged roar in his brightly-lit mansion, he's standing alone outside on the dark edge of his lawn, in the hush of the night, looking out towards a faint green light in the distance. I really think that's more true to what sx is. It's not really our selves that are intense so much as our desires are intense. We immerse ourselves in intensity as much as possible because we are seeking that "high", but our satisfaction dissipates quickly, and we find ourselves again seeking more. If only we could become the whirlwind ourselves and always be satisfied.
As for phobia/counterphobia, like you said, if pressed to choose, I'd probably label myself as phobic. I tend to come out guns blazing when threatened, but my attitude is really more phobic overall. I have a pathological need for people to like me! :c
Anyway, I don't know that I think
any 6 will live their life like they're going to die the next day. If a 6 is living like they're going to die the next day, they're going to be planning their funeral, getting their will in order, making sure they tell all the people important to them that they love them, and so on... 6s are autoprogrammed to account for the future, so I really have a hard time thinking about a 6 who lives for the moment. I don't think they would be a 6.
Both of which points are to say, I don't see ruling out 6 sx/so for any of those reasons.
As far as sp goes, I'm not sure how our treatment of sp needs lines up. I was sp-coddled as a child and thrust into sp awareness, too, and it's certainly been a learning curve, but for the most part sp needs just seem to me like another thing on a checklist - gotta have em, so I try to make them appealing and a pleasant experience. As a 6, I'm careful with money. I'm a natural saver, I pay off my credit card bills early, and if my bank account gets too low for my preference, I essentially stop spending whenever possible until it's back to normal. I've never really been completely oblivious to physical harm, but I don't generally take extra precautions like kneepads when skating or anything, either. I'm claustrophobic - I hate/am afraid of planes, elevators, tight passageways, being twisted up in blankets, and being caught in any other sort of small space. I worry about crashing when flying, elevators breaking and falling, freak car accidents, losing my temper at work or getting caught doing something stupid and getting fired, and sudden medical emergencies - all things with low likelihoods but that would cause devastating damage in my life.
enneagram.blogspot.com said:
"If I can maintain position and inclusion in the group/world, I can keep up and escalate all this merging/intensity."
This is
very accurate for me, and it's sort of nuanced in the sense that if I can maintain position/inclusion, I can continue and/or escalate the immersion and experiences that I desire. It's like if I'm not a well-liked, influential person in the world, then I'm never going to be able to make positive change in the world, or enjoy myself in my relationship by living out the roles I idealize, so I
have to keep up that position/inclusion. But it's not stressful, really, it's actually quite natural. I remember reading somewhere that your 2nd instinct tends to be your "easiest" one, because it doesn't tend to give you trouble. Your first instinct is typically your rumination point, and your last instinct your tripping point, but the middle one is sort of autopilot. Like my sx instinct is me spending the whole day running high anxiety if there's conflict in my relationship, my sp instinct is me forgetting that I left my keys in the car, and my so instinct just paddles on along.
At this point I really don't have any clear direction to point you in, instinct-wise, unfortunately. I think the point about looking at your sacrifices is a good one - what do you tend to give up first, and what do you need first? You can see it with me (sx-first) versus my boyfriend (sp-first) - it's all about the way we see priorities "stacking", literally: I see my relationship and my passions as top priority: if I'm not engaging in them, then there's no point in doing anything else, because I'm not fulfilling myself. Then comes my position/inclusion: if I'm not included, then I can't continue to enjoy my passions, because they only exist in the context of the social world. My practical needs end up last. But for him, it's totally flipped around. He sees his practical needs as coming first because without food, water, and shelter, he can't even exist physically - so in his mind that
has to be first priority. What instinct do you feel is
the most crucial to your daily operation? When you're thinking "I need", what are you usually needing?
You just proved my point. You are going to type people based on objective facts, and I'm going to type people on intuition.
Meh. You type people on facts, too, you just are starting with the grand-scale gestalt created by a specific arrangement of objective facts. Ne piggybacks on Si and vice versa; Ne requires Si points to traverse and Si requires a Ne grid to fix into. EJCC's view of things is not really all that different from ours. She just starts from the opposite end.
