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Relation of wings to core

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I feel more weighted by 5 in a negative way.... I see some 3ish-ness in myself (ie. vanity & competency), but a part of me envies the 3 side of the spectrum a lot because it looks more, er, functional.

Most criticisms of my personality I've had hurled at me over the years were noting 5ish aspects about me. This is as much due to what those people value as how I am, because emotionality is embraced within my family, but emotional stinginess is highly criticized. I'm a weird mix of the two. I also find that culturally, 3ish flaws & tendencies are seen as more normal & acceptable, whereas even average 5 traits can be viewed very negatively. I don't have the detachment of the 3 that brings a social charm; it's more like an emptiness that sucks motivation like a black hole.

So even though I relate more to the 5 side, I also feel handicapped by it more. And then worse - sometimes, no often, I don't care enough about how this handicaps me. I'm kind of just "meh" and let the chips fall.
 

Winds of Thor

New member
Joined
Jan 11, 2009
Messages
1,842
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Despite loving a 3 very very much and admiring their strength and tenacity, I cannot stand the idea of being a 3 myself. I refuse to care about the rat race that the world forces on us..or so I tell myself :)

I admire 5s greatly,and am more open to their influence as I enjoy gathering knowledge and educating myself in various fields, but the idea of being *that* emotionally cut off and aloof scares the living day lights out of me. I also..find it amusing when 5s rationalise everything and cannot identify their own emotional undercurrents which are clearly influencing them :)

So yes..I relate to what you are saying. And yes, I very much do not relate to my wings in a way.

But Ive realised over the years that I am influenced by them, very much so. I do have some need to compete and to put myself out there. And i have a very big need to understand the world and research the heck out of it. And yes, I identify with the need to impress others the way 3s do and the fear of facing the world unprepared that 5s experience.


- With love, from your 4 neighbour :smooch:
What reasons do you feel contribute to disliking being a 3?
 

Starry

Active member
Joined
May 22, 2010
Messages
6,103
Wow, okay...not everyone likes individuals of their wings I see.

I really like 6s and 8s.

This actually reminds me a bit of that love-wing theory/study thing I read that I can't find. In the negative kinda I guess.
 

misfortuneteller

New member
Joined
Apr 4, 2015
Messages
578
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I've seen my 8 wing as more of a curse than a blessing. I guess it did help me be a bit more independent when I was surrounded by toxic people. It often makes me react when i'd rather not go there and it's frustrating to deal with consequences of my blunt honesty.
 
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