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Type the man behind a Cracked article!

Magic Poriferan

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Article is here.

6 Harsh Truths That Will Make You a Better Person
By: David Wong December 17, 2012 896,118 views

2013, motherfuckers. Yeah! LET'S DO THIS.

"Do what?" you ask. I DON'T KNOW. LET'S FIGURE THAT OUT TOGETHER, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Feel free to stop reading this if your career is going great, you're thrilled with your life and you're happy with your relationships. Enjoy the rest of your day, friend, this article is not for you. You're doing a great job, we're all proud of you. So you don't feel like you wasted your click, here's a picture of Lenny Kravitz wearing a gigantic scarf.

157687_v1.jpg [had to include that]

For the rest of you, I want you to try something: Name five impressive things about yourself. Write them down or just shout them out loud to the room. But here's the catch -- you're not allowed to list anything you are (i.e., I'm a nice guy, I'm honest), but instead can only list things that you do (i.e., I just won a national chess tournament, I make the best chili in Massachusetts). If you found that difficult, well, this is for you, and you are going to fucking hate hearing it. My only defense is that this is what I wish somebody had said to me around 1995 or so.


This is a silly sort of thing, but from start to finish, I was thinking to myself that the only thing this writer could be is a 3 or an 8 (but maybe it was just written in a 3 or 8 state of mind).

What do you think? If you had to go on the article itself and nothing else about the writer, what other type would this come from?
 

Jaguar

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When did 8's become: "Hey! Let's figure that out together!" 8's are more: "My way or the highway."
Who is the type to rattle off their so-called achievements? "I make the best chili in Massachusetts and I just won a chess tournament."
(If I met the guy in person, I'd give him my line: "Who gives a shit?" ) People will probably stereotype him a 3.
 

Bamboo

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I liked the message overall. Provide something of value for the people around you.

...

Who is the type to rattle off their so-called achievements? "I make the best chili in Massachusetts and I just won a chess tournament."
(If I met the guy in person, I'd give him my line: "Who gives a shit?" ) People will probably stereotype him a 3.

Who gives a shit?

People who want to eat the best chili in Massachusetts.

People who derive pleasure from masterful use of strategy.
 

Bamboo

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That's right. I'd say: Who gives a shit.
For decades I've listened to people claim to be the best at something, when it's anything but true.

Well ok, people lie and exaggerate, but how does asking who gives a shit help?
 

Pseudo

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It reminded me of this video

It reminded me of this video:




But perhaps that is my defensive knee jerk reaction
 
G

Glycerine

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If we are going by stereotypes, 3w2 for sure. The article is focused on how an individual should project a certain image in order to be a "better person" in a mentor sort of way.... it's like a freaking peptalk where he is trying to lessen the blows of the "harsh realities" of life. A stereotypical 8 would probably be like, "cut the BS and be efficient and competent at what you do... here's what you do... if you don't, you are moronic/stupid."
 

Standuble

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I found the article last night, it echoed the exact same findings I have made about life (which I accepted with a degree of resignation I might add.) I would agree with a 3 typing as although he seems to be championing these things and not ranting about them but also how its a very clear pep talk with a degree of insight. It's very destroy and build something new from the rubble. Would 8s do that?
 
G

garbage

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If I had to listen to that Glengary Glen Ross speech, I'd bust ass to find another job. So I'd be busting ass, but not in the way that the so-called motivator intended for me to.


The article is written from a 3 state of mind, for sure. Put succinctly, "human doing" is pretty much their essence--he conflates "having value to others" with "having value in general."

.. also, when I read it yesterday, it resonated very deeply with me.
:popc1:


Based on a few of his other articles, I could be convinced that Wong is a 3. He waves some credentials around in at least a few of his articles.
 
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Magic Poriferan

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So everyone pretty clearly sees the 3. Why did I even float 8 out there then?

It's because the nature of his motivational advice is so dependent on the notion of a really hostile world, and they way to succeed in this hostile world is to basically stop being a whiny bitch and start fighting. That, and he seems rather fixated on the notion that insincerity is a bad thing. This is all about the honest truth, which you don't know because unfortunately the world is filled with phonies. I don't mean to be rude, but I think the 3 is among the least concerned with sincerity of all the Enneagram types.

The world is harsh, and people are always lying to you, but it's time you overcome that by stopping lying to yourself, and toughen the fuck up. I could hear an 8 say that, and I can distill that from the article.
 
G

Glycerine

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So everyone pretty clearly sees the 3. Why did I even float 8 out there then?
I don't mean to be rude, but I think the 3 is among the least concerned with sincerity of all the Enneagram types.
The world is harsh, and people are always lying to you, but it's time you overcome that by stopping lying to yourself, and toughen the fuck up. I could hear an 8 say that, and I can distill that from the article.

http://www.typologycentral.com/forums/heart-centers/53394-understand-damn-enneagram-3-a.html

According to the 3s on this site, that is far from the case. They are trying to project their "best image" and striving to be their best.
[MENTION=5578]bologna[/MENTION]
 

miss fortune

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The world is harsh, and people are always lying to you, but it's time you overcome that by stopping lying to yourself, and toughen the fuck up. I could hear an 8 say that, and I can distill that from the article.

just because I've made a few posts along those lines means NOTHING! :2ar15:

or anything along the lines of "you're not any more special than anyone else, so get your fucking head out of your fucking ass" :whistling:

on another note, being familiar with the man in question's articles and book, has anyone considered an image focused counterphobic 6? :huh:
 
G

garbage

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[MENTION=1449]Magic Poriferan[/MENTION] [MENTION=5109]Glycerine[/MENTION]

I still lean toward 3, but I can see rationale for 8 after MP's explanation.

MP's actually spot-on with respect to 3s--they're typically less concerned with sincerity than many of the others. Balls-out truth in general is a standout trait of the 8, and balls-out truth about the self is a standout of.. well, the "not 3." That nuance is important because they're both seen as assertive types, and it's difficult in this case to draw a distinction.

Healthy 3s, however, are depicted as self-forgetting and actually unafraid of a bit of vulnerability and self-revelation when it comes to guiding others, e.g.
Level 1 (At Their Best): Self-accepting, inner-directed, and authentic, everything they seem to be. Modest and charitable, self-deprecatory humor and a fullness of heart emerge. Gentle and benevolent.
On the other hand, healthy 8s are depicted as 'protectors of the weak.'

The article could certainly be interpreted either way.
 
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UniqueMixture

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my first thought was "he sounds like me"
 

Magic Poriferan

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just because I've made a few posts along those lines means NOTHING! :2ar15:

or anything along the lines of "you're not any more special than anyone else, so get your fucking head out of your fucking ass" :whistling:

I thought you were a 7 though. :huh:

on another note, being familiar with the man in question's articles and book, has anyone considered an image focused counterphobic 6? :huh:

I have, but I said to go on the article, didn't I?
 
W

WALMART

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I don't know, but this article resonates deep within me.


I'm tired of listening to pussy whiners complain about having to work, or what it's like not liking society, all that bullshit. Grow up and open your eyes.


If I had to listen to that Glengary Glen Ross speech, I'd bust ass to find another job. So I'd be busting ass, but not in the way that the so-called motivator intended for me to.
David Wong said:
As smarter people have pointed out, the genius of that speech is that half of the people who watch it think that the point of the scene is "Wow, what must it be like to have such an asshole boss?" and the other half think, "Fuck yes, let's go out and sell some goddamned real estate!"


I worked a semi-retail position with an ENTJ manager. Had to sit through a couple of these things. Made me a stronger person.
 

Bamboo

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I guess your expectations of this article change how you read it, but since it's on Cracked I expected something slanted and entertaining.

So it served that purpose well, and had enough grain of truth for me to say I enjoyed it.

But to really want to wake up to that movie speech every day, or to totally ignore the value of differences in "doing" compared to "being" cultures doesn't seem healthy. Neither does assuming that humanity is totally socially motivated by clear, logical incentives, though he makes a point of this with the 'it's not just money' part.

But to have it in your mind to provide value to others instead of focusing on traits that you just "are" and expecting something to just come out of that is a really valuable insight that will let you exchange so much more with the world around you.
 

miss fortune

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I thought you were a 7 though. :huh:

upon further thought and such, 8 is such a better fit! :laugh:

I have, but I said to go on the article, didn't I?

you're not the boss of me, mr sponge! :nono:

no questioning my yuletide charity... :thelook:

I worked a semi-retail position with an ENTJ manager. Had to sit through a couple of these things. Made me a stronger person.

I used to have the departing piece of advice for my minions every morning that went "kick some ass or I'll kick yours! :cheese:"

it actually worked... especially when the threat was carried through with a few times :ninja:
 
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