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[Traditional Enneagram] how does an enneagram 2 mature

draon9

Active member
Joined
Jan 27, 2015
Messages
1,176
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
so
In order for an enneagram 2 to mature, a lot of enneagram 2s need to start having better judgment of situations and question their own motivations. Enneagram 2s need to start asking why are they helping this particular person ? is it out of pride or is it out of compassion,is it so you can get what you want from them in the future. They need to stay away from toxic people and toxic relationships. Enneagrams 2s can be very diplomatic,tactful and can be good psychologist,counselors,lawyers,doctors and ambassadors. Enneagram 2s are just as dangerous as 3s,8s and 5s,they are a bit more subtle about it and tactful about it. Also all enneagrams need to,but especially enneagram 2s need to start understanding the concept of love and know how to picks if someone does not love them for them because if they don't,they are going to be in toxic relationship after toxic relationship after toxic relationship to the point where they go gay or kill themselves or don't trust relationships. They also need to realize that love does not always conquer all.
 

ceecee

Coolatta® Enjoyer
Joined
Apr 22, 2008
Messages
15,908
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
8w9
Go gay? You make it sound like something that happens if you drive around on a tire with a slow leak.
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,037
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
496
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
[MENTION=24057]draon9[/MENTION]
Sorry to hear you have had to deal with a lot of toxic relationships. If you are in the middle of toxic relationships right now, it can be helpful to have a professional counselor to talk to about it. Maybe they would be Enneagram 2 with experience and maturity like you describe. This is the answer to the question of helping to gain relationship maturity - I think professional counselors are helpful source for learning how to deal with problematic relationships and gain maturity.

Advice from counselors is something that I have done in my life and found it very helpful. The problem with toxic relationships is how often they use inconsistency. Sometimes the most hurtful actions are contrasted with kindnesses and so when you are emotionally involved, it is difficult to have clarity about it. Also talking things through with a toxic person can cause the same problems that discussing business with a conman causes. I went through a whole scenario where I lost $750 to a scam artist. When I had to report them to various professional services, I was given stern advice to not continue any communication exchanges with the scammer because they are so good at crafting words to get people on board even after scamming them. They are the same as emotional scam artists. They start with beautiful words, entice you into thinking something is in your best interest, they get what they want from you, then demand everything and give nothing.

I would go to counselors to get an outside, uninvested opinion about the specific dynamics. One of the best pieces of advice I was told by a counselor is that "to extinguish an unwanted behavior, give it no attention."
 
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