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  1. #1
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    Default Stackemup Enneagram Description for Enneatype II

    Type 2

    Twos are sociable, energetic and friendly people who strive to be loved and approved of. They want to be needed and seen as indispensable in the lives of others. They have given up on their desire for mirroring because it wasn't given to them in childhood. So they seek love by giving others the mirroring that they were deprived of. Twos aren't wired to compromise/negotiate/bargain with the world in order to do so, though, but attempt to seductively maneuver others into a spot of dependence, maintaining themselves in the willful position.

    Twos are other-directed. They are unable to approve of themselves internally therefore approval and validation has to be bestowed upon them by others. As a result, Twos turn their attention outwards and have difficulty forming an identity that is separate from other people. This “other-directed tendency” makes Twos vulnerable to the dispositions of other people but also gives them sensitivity for the thoughts and feelings of those they seek the approval of. It also gives them a vigilance for possible rejection. Ultimately, they want to win people over and are on the look-out for signs of indifference. Indifference is something that Twos hate as they interpret emotional neutrality as rejection.

    Twos often have a religious orientation. Religion stimulates the Twos idealized self-image of somebody saint-like, loved and adored by the world for their deeds. Religion also offers an avenue by which Twos can be more helpful in the lives of others. It gives Twos a way to convey that they are good intentioned people as well as encourages others to support the view that Twos are indeed self-sacrificing. Twos repress their own needs in order to maintain a positive image of themselves as unselfish, helpful, nurturing, and good. Twos often like to talk about their good intentions in conversation. Other people are needy and dependent in the Two’s view, not them.

    Twos are people-pleasers. They adapt themselves to others in the anticipation that they will be rejected if they do not and approach interpersonal relations through “maneuvers.” They become artful in the “seductive ploy.” Such ploys are designed to elicit love, attention and approval. Twos also engage in an unconscious form of competition with individuals of the same sex.

    Twos are assertive. They are not meek and don’t sit around passively waiting for people to show up with approval in hand. In fact, they have a strong will when it comes to getting what they want. Often, they look for situations and people they can cheer on. They sometimes display a great deal of brashness in the service of courting approval. They are action-oriented, while still primarily emotional, and take the initiative to fill voids where they can be indispensable. Twos are often brash in conversation as well with love running through their thoughts as a constant theme. They tend to pry for secrets and look for opportunities where they can give advice to others, even where the Two has no more than general advice to give. All that really matters is that the Two be appreciated for giving the advice.

    Twos will often “relationship-hop”. The Two may successfully win somebody over only to reveal a lack of internal prompting about what to do once the relationship moves into a more serious phase. Because they are so outer-directed, their inner world tends to lack substance and complexity, often rendering them uncertain or confused when things get serious. This can often cause them to connect with others in only a facile and fickle way. Like all image types, there is a disparity between their inner world and the outer impression they give. And Twos express this disparity more than the other image types. In the inner world, they remain naïve and immature. But their external presentation has a pretense of being deeper and complex. Twos deal with this disparity through repression. They don't let their own emptiness enter their mind. And once the person they are in a relationship with starts to catch onto their lack of depth, Twos look for new relationships to hop into in order to keep the truth about their emptiness hidden from others and, more importantly, from themselves.

    Twos are superficial. They overdo their affect to an extent that their displays of affection can come across as smooth and glib. They start to snowball people about their feelings and use expression to amplify their connections to people. The positive is a feeling they exaggerate and the negative is a feeling they underplay. Twos may also utilize words and phrases that happen to be in fashion or to convey an impression of substance. Their orientation towards sensory detail and knowledge tends to be impressionistic and highly subjective. Very often these impressions are infused with the Two’s own repressed hostility and neediness, often disguising a lack of any real thought or curiosity.

    The passion of type Two is pride. Twos use pride to cover the hole in their self-worth. The pride is essentially an over-exaggerated sense of self-worth based on what the Two provides to others. Perhaps we can turn to a post from a real life type Two to illuminate the inner experience of pride:

    The verbal representation of the feeling goes like this: "I'm so great, they couldn't manage without me." There's a bloated/inflated feeling to it... imagine a water balloon and you're on the right track. You can see why it's so important not to recognize the meaning of the feeling. The inner illusion of humility is the crucial "ticket" that gives the 2 permission to keep feeling prideful.

    Twos are manipulative. One way that Twos try to bloat up their sense of worth is by “collecting” needy people that they can rescue. In some cases the Two may try to manipulate adults who aren’t needy into occupying the role of children who are. It’s not uncommon for Twos to pick up hitchhikers or build relationships with the homeless. It’s not that other types never do such things, but with prideful Twos, their entire sense of worth and importance depends on doing it. Twos often seek to mold a network around them. The Two will positions themselves at the center of the network, serving all the needs of others in return for an endless stream of adulation and love. Twos may be quite skilled at eliciting the admiration of others while not giving much of their own in return. Twos begin to think of themselves as the most important thing in the lives of the people they have “sacrificed” so much of themselves for and they feel threatened by signs of independence or ego from others. When Twos sense that people are making shows of independence, they will call attention to it.

    Twos are enabling. They develop an “enabling tendency” and expect others to reciprocate by doing what the Two wants. The main thing is that Twos are out to enable others if it will strengthen that person’s dependency on the Two. This only prompts further rejection and leads Twos into openly demanding that people love them back. They start to encroach on people’s boundaries and try to coerce them into doing things that will reflect back the Two’s own sense of importance. Twos get bossy. However, when the Two does receive love and approval, they tend to get little satisfaction out of it since they wonder whether people would have done the same without the Twos’ prompting. Twos still believe that their intentions are good. If Twos were to view their intentions as bad, then they would not feel their actions are justifiable.

    Unhealthy Twos are masochistic. They manipulate people into keeping all their attention on them, even if the Two brings harm upon themselves in exchange for the attention. Twos grow more co-dependent and increasingly possessive of intimates. They condition themselves to withstand as much abuse as others can throw at them. By withstanding abuse they see themselves as doing others a "noblesse oblige" service, on a deeper level assuming that abuse indicates how important they are to their abusers, which becomes another source of pride. To the extent that a two takes pride in their ability to let others abuse them, the two will go out of their way to court such abuse.

    Healthy Twos are emotionally honest. They let go of their positive self-image and realize that their own actions have been selfish. This leads Twos into a more genuine ability to help people unconditionally. They come to view that they aren’t going to just ride in and save the day. They also recognize that not everybody needs their help and that people are not as needy as the Two assumes. They gain a sense of boundaries. Healthiness for Twos also gives them an ability to appraise themselves independently and to recognize their own worth. Approval is not something that has to be gained but exists naturally and independently of outer approval is what Twos realize.

    2w1s are altruistic. They strongly embody the servant aspect of type Two and feel a strong sense to volunteer themselves for the welfare of others. They often disdain ‘ownership’ and ‘greed’ and are drawn to work in the healing, helping, or sometimes legal professions.

    2w1s are serious. They are more restrained in their emotional expression, sometimes spock-like, but not as a rule, and tend to get things done. They have more common sense and practical survival skills than 2w3s. They are also driven by more guilt and self-criticism than 2w3s and don’t go after what they want as manipulatively, or connect with people as easily, often preferring to work behind the scenes or in an independent capacity. They don’t get distracted by frivolous pursuits.

    2w1s can often get argumentative and be outspoken. They are rigid in their views and more critical of other peoples’ actions. They can overreact when rules are unfair, take their marbles and go home. They give moral credence to their feelings, “it’s the right thing to do”, and will start to talk at people rather than to them. They can be punitive and are quicker to reject people for calling their good intentions into question. However, such separations are often just temporary.

    3w2s are charming. They exude feel-good vibes, are hyperactive, and can seem nervous around issues that pertain to validation. They are more prone to temper tantrums.They know how to sell people on their desirability. They can turn moods and feelings on like a light switch, knowing what will garner them attention. A master at reading others' needs, they can project feeling-states on cue.

    2w3s are fickle. They can be histrionic attention-seekers. They seek out stimulation on a constant basis and they try to impress and amuse people, seeking to sell and market themselves, and they engage people as if they were trying to fill a bottomless pit within themselves. They seem caring, have a softer touch and look for ways to please others as a way to court admiration. They constantly perform and enjoy the spotlight. They can be prone to exaggerated overconfidence and extreme forms of workaholism

    2w3s are coquettes. Giving others gifts or simply their attention is their main form of generosity. They have more awareness for image and tend to strongly embody the seductive aspect of type Two. They like to flatter and stroke people’s egos more than the other wing does and 2w3s often do it indiscriminately and on occasions not suited for it, but can go hot and cold, very often compartmentalizing their connections.

    2w3s are clingy. When less healthy, they don’t just let go of relationships or take rejection easily. If rejected, their focus can escalate to the point of stalking and harassing. They may spy on people or show up in unexpected places. They can become obsessed with individuals, sometimes consumed by a destructive jealousy.

    Distinctions:

    Threes are self-validating. Twos seek external validation from others.

    Fours dwell in their inner worlds. Twos usually avoid it.

    Fives are detached. Twos are emotionally expressive.

    Six vigilance scans for danger. Two vigilance scans for rejection.

    Seven hedonism is unrestrained. Two hedonism is well-mannered.

    Both eights and twos are energetic and assertive. However, the assertiveness of type two does not run on an aggressive mind. Eights are aggressive-minded. The two energy and assertiveness works more in the service of volunteering and sacrificing themselves to others.

    Twos are assertive in their other-seeking. Nines are fatalistic in their other-seeking.

    Ones are more focused on principle. Twos focus more on people.
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  2. #2
    Member WatchlessThyme's Avatar
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    To see the amalgam of your very being written in neat little sentences is mind blowing... I am SO a 2w1.
    Likes five sounds liked this post

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