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Jupiter Ascending

Tellenbach

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The most important element of a film is the plot. Special effects and high priced actors are just make-up on a pig and it doesn't matter if you do spend $170 million on the make-up; it still won't cover up the threadbare plot. Meg in Space is one of the more disappointing films I've seen; no character development at all in this.
 

Totenkindly

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Meg in Space is one of the more disappointing films I've seen; no character development at all in this.

What's that movie? Never heard of it. (maybe that's why, lol.)

Well, you're conflating "plot" and "character development" here. I think either of those can make an interesting movie -- all plot or all character development. of course, a better movie often has both.

The problem is when you get a movie that is all eye candy with no character development and a confusing mess of a plot that can't generate any real tension because it's designed so sloppily. I think eye candy is the thing that, even when beautiful, is hard to sit through two hours of. If I want eye candy, make it a ten minute film or just make some pretty pictures. the extra dimension of film (length) is naturally suited towards plot, character dev, or both.
 

Tellenbach

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Jennifer said:
What's that movie? Never heard of it. (maybe that's why, lol.)

Hint: What's Mila Kunis best known for?

No, I wasn't conflating plot with character development. This film has neither. The action was fine but there was too much action; after a while, the action becomes boring. I call it the Robocop 3 effect.
 

Totenkindly

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Hint: What's Mila Kunis best known for?

No, I wasn't conflating plot with character development. This film has neither. The action was fine but there was too much action; after a while, the action becomes boring. I call it the Robocop 3 effect.

Robocop 3.....rofl! Saw the first two, and 2 was enough for me.

I think Kunis got big on That 70s Show....but I never watched it. (And there is your Robocop tie in....aka Kurtwood Smith.)

...
The female lead of Jupiter Ascending, Jupiter Jones, shares the name of one of the investigators in the Three Investigators series of juvenile detective novels: the chubby, and male, Jupiter Jones.

I bet THAT Jupiter wasn't nearly as purdy.


... and yeah, case in point: How come all these "discovered rulers" are always drop-dead gorgeous by conventional standards? Even average or slightly above average would be a nice change of pace. I'm reading this Jupiter here is pretty passive in the storyline.
 

Mal12345

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Robocop 3.....rofl! Saw the first two, and 2 was enough for me.

I think Kunis got big on That 70s Show....but I never watched it. (And there is your Robocop tie in....aka Kurtwood Smith.)



I bet THAT Jupiter wasn't nearly as purdy.


... and yeah, case in point: How come all these "discovered rulers" are always drop-dead gorgeous by conventional standards? Even average or slightly above average would be a nice change of pace. I'm reading this Jupiter here is pretty passive in the storyline.

Well, for example, what if the chick at 14:27 in this video played Trinity in the actual Matrix movies? Would The Matrix have gone on to become a trilogy?

 

Totenkindly

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Probably not, although she's not even "average" -- so you ignored my wording.

And while I think Carrie Anne Moss was a model, I don't think she's particularly beautiful in the conventional way that Kunis is -- and also, I think no one looks at Trinity as eye candy. The first thing you think of is, "She kicks ass," not "Oh, she's a hot woman that kicks ass." That's one thing I really liked about her.
 

Mal12345

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Probably not, although she's not even "average" -- so you ignored my wording.

And while I think Carrie Anne Moss was a model, I don't think she's particularly beautiful in the conventional way that Kunis is -- and also, I think no one looks at Trinity as eye candy. The first thing you think of is, "She kicks ass," not "Oh, she's a hot woman that kicks ass." That's one thing I really liked about her.

EHRMAGERHD, I IGNORED YOUR WORDING!!!!!!!!!!

lol
 

Totenkindly

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EHRMAGERHD, I IGNORED YOUR WORDING!!!!!!!!!!

lol

I specifically said average or a bit above average in my post, purposefully, and you ignored it out of convenience to your argument. If this is the direction you're going to take this again, then see ya.
 

Mal12345

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Would this girl have been a popular Trinity, or would she have destroyed Matrix as a movie?

58739840.jpg
 

Gamine

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I think the cast stinks. Chad Tatum no doubt is a good looking man but can't act and the same goes for that young lady.

They should have picked Tom Hardy and some other female to play the role.

Or Tom Hardy could have played both roles. :wubbie:
 

Edgar

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Then again, I thought Speed Racer was awesome, so I'm probably not one to judge their talents.

I thought Speed Racer was great. And from the trailer, I'd say Jupiter Ascending will be total shit.
 

Totenkindly

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I saw it tonight in Imax 3D. (Yeah, I'm stupid and/or brave.)

To be honest, I think most critics are shitheads and basically have just made the Wachowski's into the current whipping children.

no, it wasn't worth the $200 million pricetag. And no, it wasn't the kind of movie you want to buy and watch over and over and over again. But it was perfectly acceptable popcorn-night at the movies material. I know it's not saying much, but it was far better than that shit that Lucas shoveled on in the SW prequels, which had better actors but far worse lines.

I also thought a lot of the stuff people were bitching about in the reviews wasn't nearly as bad on-screen in real time, since the editing tended to not linger on it. (The "bees" thing, for example, sounds REALLY stupid based on our understanding of life on this planet -- but if you accepted that life on earth is genetically engineered for certain purposes, and the fact the edit doesn't linger on the line(s), then it's not really a big deal.) Or people bitching about the "registration" segment, that it was a diversion. Actually it was pretty amusing, and it was edited decently so that it clipped right along... and has a nice little cameo by Terry Gilliam at the end, if you recognize him. It really didn't drag out at all.

Same thing with him "saving her all the time" -- in the plot of the movie, it made sense and didn't seem overdone to me; and she actually does stand up when she needs to, to the limits of her ability. in fact the scenes with her and redmayne are kind of hilarious because she's supposedly a big galactic queen and he's a big bad-ass heir who has done some awful things and likes to channel Valdemort... but it's all just a ruse. Once they start going at each other, Redmayne's really a big wuss and Kunis is playing a woman who doesn't know how to fight... really kind of funny to watch.

My biggest gripe with the film is simply that it feels like it's only glossing the surface of something much bigger -- i.e., this should have been Chapter 1 in a book, and once you start to get a feel for things (along with Jupiter, who is completely naive and keeps getting taken in by the machinations of people far more skilled at the game than her. but then begins to catch on), the movie ends. The story itself isn't really much at all, in the end, when you take a step back... kind of anti-climactic for all the pomp and circumstance of the title and premise.

Anyway, my impression is that people came in expecting one kind of movie and got something else... or they did expect this kind of movie and just didn't like it and resented having to critique it. Yes, the Wachowskis are capable of making a better movie, and I wish they would, but if you accept this was a popcorn movie and don't expect more than that, it was fine.

.... and yeah, the visuals in 3D were pretty cool.

.... and yeah, now we know what happened to the dinos and where crop circles come from, and.... whatever else. I was kind of laughing at some of the stuff that got snuck in.
 

Totenkindly

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Seemed like a pretty fair review by James Berardinelli:
Reelviews Movie Reviews

Especially with the first paragraph:
Jupiter Ascending, the latest eye-popping stepchild of the Wachowskis, excels at universe building. The problem is that the backstory is too large to contain what appears on screen during the course of a 127-minute motion picture. Put another way, Jupiter Ascending feels like a truncated, Cliffs Notes version of something that might have worked a lot better as a mini-series. Two hours is too short for this tale and the end result suffers greatly because of that restriction.

That's kind of what I was saying in a roundabout way: Not much seems to happen, considering the "galactic scope" of the movie, each "episode" felt very truncated and when the two hours runs out, the story ends... yet we seem to have missed a lot.

This could have possibly done better as a two-week miniseries or something, or a one season series on Netflix.
 

Julius_Van_Der_Beak

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I can't figure out why Speed Racer was so entertaining and this was so bad. The only thing that can be said about it is that some of the technology and "sets" give a cool David Lynch's Dune vibe (and for some reason that movie's a lot more watchable), and I liked Eddie Redmayne's performance as Space Lannister #3. I feel like they were trying to Game of Thrones in space, but this movie was so stupid, and not even in a fun way. It was just stupid. Speed Racer recreated the feeling of being 5 and playing with your Hot Wheels, only with a lot more care and detail. This was just a big mess. All the ideas are undercooked. I think the Larry and Lana can be interesting filmmakers... I liked Cloud Atlas and I even liked the second Matrix movie (although the third was just a big bunch of "meh"), but they totally missed the mark here.

It's just a very dumb movie, and nothing about it makes me want to revisit that world. I know Sean Bean was in this, but I can't even remember if he lived or died. I'd rather just watch Dune again if I wanted my space baroque fix. And yeah, that's not really a good movie either, but it's a lot more watchable. (Or, for that matter, the Star Wars prequels. I actually liked the space politics aspect of them and thought that was kind of interesting.) I really wanted to like this movie on some level, any level, but it just didn't work.
 

Totenkindly

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I can't figure out why Speed Racer was so entertaining and this was so bad. The only thing that can be said about it is that some of the technology and "sets" give a cool David Lynch's Dune vibe (and for some reason that movie's a lot more watchable), and I liked Eddie Redmayne's performance as Space Lannister #3. I feel like they were trying to Game of Thrones in space, but this movie was so stupid, and not even in a fun way. It was just stupid. Speed Racer recreated the feeling of being 5 and playing with your Hot Wheels, only with a lot more care and detail. This was just a big mess. All the ideas are undercooked. I think the Larry and Lana can be interesting filmmakers... I liked Cloud Atlas and I even liked the second Matrix movie (although the third was just a big bunch of "meh"), but they totally missed the mark here.

It's just a very dumb movie, and nothing about it makes me want to revisit that world. I know Sean Bean was in this, but I can't even remember if he lived or died. I'd rather just watch Dune again if I wanted my space baroque fix. And yeah, that's not really a good movie either, but it's a lot more watchable. (Or, for that matter, the Star Wars prequels. I actually liked the space politics aspect of them and thought that was kind of interesting.) I really wanted to like this movie on some level, any level, but it just didn't work.

I think if everyone had played it kind of campy (like Redmayne did -- he was so over the top) and then Tatum -- he has silly pointy ears and there are so many dog jokes for god's sake -- and the thing with the bees, and reducing folks to liquid life, and so much crazy stuff.... then it might as worked as some kind of buckaroo bonsai or Flash Gordon style flick. I think it was really a death knell for them to go for a more serious tone / have the actors play it so straight for large portions. I wish they had just had fun with it instead of trying to make it "a big deal."

Yeah, my rewatchable Wachowski movies are:

- Bound
- The Matrix
- The Matrix Reloaded
- Cloud Atlas

Cloud Atlas still can make me cry in spots, it's flawed but I don't know how to correct the flaws -- it works together to be something larger than the sum of its parts (but hey I think that is the point of it as well).

I haven't seen Speed Racer yet, and still haven't bothered with episode 5+ of Sense8.
 
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