Fry
What year you from?
Robert
Two thousand and ten.
Fry
Two thousand...
Two thousand and ten!?
Wait a minute!
That's not the twentieth century!
That's the twenty first century!
Robert
Yeah, I know.
What's up with everyone saying I'm from the twentieth century?
Sure, I was born in it an' all...
Say, what year is it anyway?
Leela
It's three thousand and nine.
Robert Gasps
Robert
Oh my god!
My visa ran out nine hundred and ninety nine years ago!
Fry
Your visa?
Robert
Yes, my visa!
I was only allowed in your country for three months!
For holiday purposes only, I'm actually from the UK.
Fry
Never heard of it.
Robert
Great Britain.
Fry
Oh!
That place.
So that's why the British Museum wanted you?
Robert
The British Museum wanted me?
Fry
Yeah.
We were supposed to ship you to London.
Robert
You mean you were deporting me?
Fry
No, The British Museum's on Earth.
Robert
Wha?
Leela stands up and walks over to Robert.
Leela
Okay, okay, I'm sure Robert's had enough excitement for one day.
Hi, I'm Leela, over there is Fry.
Fry smiling and waving.
Fry
Hello.
Leela
He's from the twentieth century too.
Robert
Twenty first century.
Leela
Whatever.
This is Bender, Amy and The Professor.
Camera pans across the table left to right.
Bender belches a flame.
Bender
Pardon me.
Amy
Hello.
Pan to the right of Leela and Robert standing to reveal the professor drooling.
Time passes
Int Planet Express Day
Robert is seen sitting at the table between Fry and Leela
sitting next to Fry is Bender, sitting next to Leela is Amy.
The Professor is seen sitting at the head of the table.
Robert
So this is the year three thousand?
Leela
Three thousand and nine!
Robert
Whatever.
Robert looking at Bender
Robert
And you're a robot?
Bender
I was the last time I checked.
Wait, let me do another systems check, just to be sure.
Bender shuts his visor
Then re-opens it again
Bender
Hahahahaha.
I'm just messing with ya!
Of course I'm a robot!
Amy
And I'm from Mars!
Robert
You're from Mars?
Amy
No Guh!
Robert looking at Leela.
Robert
Are you a Martian too?
Leela
Nope, Earthican.
Robert
Earthican?
Leela
It means I'm from Earth.
Robert
Oh!
You were born here?
Were your parents from Mars?
Amy
Mine were.
Leela
No, no.
I'm a mutant.
Robert
Oh...
That explains the eye.
And you're from the twentieth century?
Robert looks at Fry.
Fry
Yup!
Dr. Zoidberg walks in through the futuristic doors.
Camera focuses on Dr. Zoidberg who is off model wearing a Fishy Joe's Bucket on his head amongst his usual apparel.
Camera slowly pans up and down Dr. Zoidberg.
Int Planet Express Day
Robert is seen sitting at the table.
Robert
I don't want to know.
Pan to the head of the table where The Professor can be seen sitting.
The Professor
Oh, that's just harmless Doctor Zoidberg.
Dr. Zoidberg
Hello!
Dr. Zoidberg turns around and walks out of the futuristic doors.
Leela
We need to get you processed.
Robert
Huh?
Leela
You're in luck, it was my job counseling defrostys.
We'll get you a job and see if you have any decedents in the thirty first century.
Robert
I still can't believe it.
Everybody I've ever known are all dead!
Leela
That's why we need to get you processed.
Robert
Because everybody I know is dead?
Leela
No, so you'll find it easier adjusting to society.
Robert
Oh.
Leela
I'm going to call my old boss and explain to him what happened.
Leela holds up her arm and presses a button on her wrist thingy.
Snd EFX digital beep
Leela
I'll just give Applied Cryogenics a call...
Leela's Wrist Thingy
You have one unplayed message.
Leela
Play.
Hermes
What in the name of Bob Marley's head happened to your package to London?
I demand to see you in my office immediately!
Leela presses a button on her wrist thingy.
Snd EFX digital beep
Leela
Oh shoot!
I have to go see Hermes.
Fry, Bender, could you take Robert down to the Cryogenics Lab for me.
Please?
I'll meet you guys down there once I'm finished being penalized.
Fry
Sure, no problem.
Bender
Well...
Since you did say please.
Leela
Great!
Hopefully Hermes won't take too long shouting at me.
Ext Streets of New New York Day
Fry, Bender and Robert are seen walking down the streets of New New York.
Fry
So Robert, now you're in the future, there are all sorts of things you can do.
Robert
Like what?
Fry
You can go to the moon, see distant stars and have your picture taken with any celebrity's head.
Robert
Really?
Fry
Oh yeah.
There's tons of stuff you can now do in the future.
Like if you like listening to music, you can listen to hours of it, all from the comfort of your own pocket!
Fry pulls an IPod out of his pocket and hands it to Robert.
Robert
We had these for quite a while back in two thousand and ten.
Fry
Really?
Robert hands the IPod back to Fry
Bender looks across the street panning to a group of Hookerbots seen on the other side.
Camera focuses on Bender's upper body, his eyes extend out.
Bender
Yowl!
The new Sexatron nine thousand is out.
I bet she knows how to please a man bot such as myself.
Cut to Fry, Bender and Robert on the streets of New New York
Robert
A hooker?
Aren't you afraid you might catch something!?
Bender
Nah, it's okay.
I've got virus protection.
Fry, Bender and Robert continue to walk past the Hookerbots, they get to the end of the street, the camera pans out and a tall building is revealed. Seen on the front of this building are huge neon letters that read Applied Cryogenics.
Fry
We're here!
Cut to behind Fry, Bender and Robert. Zoom in on behind Robert's head looking up, camera pans up the building. Underneath the neon writing seen on the building is a smaller sign that reads Welcoming you to the world of tomorrow, today.
Int Applied Cryogenics Hall Day
Elevator doors at the start of the hall way open and Fry Bender and Robert step out to walk down the hall with several doors. One of the doors is clearly marked Auction Room.
Fry, Bender and Robert walk past the camera that's focused on the Auction Room door.
Auctioneer
What are my bids for this fine specimen from the twenty fourth century?
Original organs still in their original packaging.
Do I hear five dollars?
Professor Wernstrum
I bid five dollars!
Int Ipgee's Office Day
Ipgee is seen sitting at his desk working on a computer.
SND EFX Digital Noise
Ipgee
Come in.
Futuristic doors open and Fry, Bender and Robert walk through them.
Ipgee
Well hello mister Fry!
I regret to inform you that you are four years late for work, plus I've had to redecorate your office in your long, unexplained absence.
Fry
Hi, sorry.
Leela meant to call you.
We've got this unfrozen guy from the twenty first century here and we need to use your Probealator to help him track down his family.
Ipgee
Why of course!
Ipgee looks on his computer screen.
Ipgee
I'm afraid it's in use right now.
You gentlemen will have to wait.
Robert
What's a Probealator?
Ipgee
Take a seat in the waiting room.
Int Applied Cryogenics Waiting Room Day
Fry, Bender and Robert are seen sitting in the waiting room.
An apathetic worker is seen reading a magazine behind a window.
Robert
I don't know what to say.
The future seems so cold and disturbing, not one bit how I imagined it.
I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
Robert stands up and walks out of the waiting room.
Bender
Someone's being awfully dramatic.
Fry
Cut the poor guy some slack, for him, this morning was last night, in two thousand and ten!
He was just going to get some luvin', then the next thing he knows, bam!
It's daylight and he's laying in a freezer tube out on the streets, a thousand years later.
Bender
So?
Fry
So you don't understand Bender.
I know what it's like to be in his shoes.
Bender
No you don't.
Leela walks into the waiting room.
Leela
I'm here now, where's Robert?
Fry
He went to the Bathroom.
Leela
Is he alright?
Fry
I guess so.
Int Applied Cryogenics Bathroom Day
Robert is seen looking at himself in the bathroom mirror.
Robert
Oh god!
This is a nightmare!
That stupid B...
I can't even bring myself to say it!
There I was!
Three thousand miles from home and having a ball happily enjoying my holiday.
I was having the time of my life!
Then that hussy I met at the Dairy Queen pushed me into that bloody thing,
and now look at me!
One thousand years from home!
My brother, my brothers!
And my sisters!
My parents and my nan!
All dead!
They're all dead!
Even my baby niece is dust!
Ahhhh!
I don't think I can take this!
That stupid girl.
That Stu-pid girl!
I hate her!
Robert cries out
Robert
What has she done to me!
I hate her!
She ruined my life!
Oh god I hate her!
Robert takes in a deep breath.
And starts blubbering into the mirror
Robert
I hate her so much!
And now she's dead!
Oh god!
Everyone I know are all dead!
This is the worst day of my life!
Robert lowers his head and sulks into the sink.
Robert
I want my family.
He looks up to see Fry in the Bathroom mirror.
He turns around to look at Fry, wiping away his tears.
Fry
You ready?
Robert
Yeah, I.
I just got a little bit of soap caught my eyes, I'll be fine.
Fry smiles at Robert
Fry
It's time.
Robert
Okay.
Robert and Fry walk out of the Bathroom.
Int Applied Cryogenics Waiting Room Day
Leela and Bender are standing in the waiting room.
Fry and Robert walk in.
The apathetic worker is seen behind a window.
Robert
Hey Leela.
Leela
Sup?
Apathetic Worker
You can go through to the Probealator now.
Applied Cryogenics Probealator Room Day
Robert is seen floating on the Probealator naked.
He has a worried expression on his face
Cut to Fry and Leela sitting next to the Probealator's controls.
Leela
Now you may feel some discomfort.
Cut to Robert's eyes seen bulging out.
Cut to Fry and Leela sitting next to the Probealator's controls.
Leela
Relax.
She turns a dial on the Probealator's control panel.
Snd EFX Power Drill
Robert
Aaaaarrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh-llllllllllllllllllllllllllllllooooooooooooow
wwwwwwwwit! Rude boy!
The power drill sound stops.
Cut to Robert seen looking traumatized floating on the Probealator.
Cut to Fry and Leela at the Probelator control panel.
Leela
Just a second.
Snd Efx Microwave Bell Chime Once
She turns the Dial
Snd Efx Power Drill
Snd Efx Electric Charge
Robert
YAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
The power drill and electric charge sounds stop.
Cut to Robert looking even more traumatized.
Leela
Alright, It's complete.
You can put your clothes back on now.
Bender comes into the shot and knock's Robert off the Probealator.
Robert
Ow!
Bender jumps onto the Probealator table and is seen floating where Robert was floating.
Bender
My turn!
Int Applied Cryogenics Room Sunset
Leela and Fry are at a desk with a computer and printer.
Robert is sitting at a chair wearing trousers, seen putting his T-shirt on and then his socks.
In the background a drill can be heard with electric shocks.
Bender is heard laughing in the background.
Leela
You have seven hundred, sixty three known decedents alive in the thirty first century.
Snd Efx digital beep
Leela
Make that seven hundred, sixty two, and a half.
Robert
Well I was the youngest out of eleven children.
Leela
Figures.
We'll just narrow it down for you and find out, out of all of these is closely related to you.
The printer prints out a piece of paper with Mom's face on it
The power drill and electric charge sounds stop.
Leela and Fry gasp.
Leela & Fry
Mom!?
Robert
Mum?
The printer prints out another piece of paper with someone else's face on it.
Leela
Oh sorry, my mistake.
This is your real great great great
Int Applied Cryogenics Room Night
Leela
Great great grand nephew.
Robert
That's good, but he looks nothing like me.
Can I get another pick of the seven hundred and sixty?
Leela
You know, with such a wide margin of decedents, I woulda thought you'll be happy.
Robert
I guess your right.
I'll take him.
Leela
That's great.
Now here's the job the computer says you'll be best suited for.
Leela turns the computer screen around to view.
On it reads Lead Guitarist/Sitcom Writer
Robert
That doesn't look so bad.
Leela
Give me your hand.
She gets a career chip and inserts it into the device.
Robert holds out his arm giving his hand to Leela who peirces the chip into it.
Snd EFX Staple Gun
Robert
Ouch!
Now I can't play guitar no more!
Leela
Yes you can.
Robert moves his hand around moving his fingers.
Robert
Hmmm, I guess you're right.
Fry
So now you're all set.
Bender walks in through a set of futuristic doors.
Bender
She's still got it.
Ext Outside Applied Cryogenics Night
Leela, Fry, Robert and Bender are seen standing outside the building.
Bender's arm extends out to snatch a wallet from Robert's back pocket.
Bender chuckles
Leela
I guess you'll want to spend time with your nephew now.
Robert
I don't really want to.
Leela
I think you should.
Fry
Yeah, I think you should too, you may even get to like the little guy.
Robert
Well okay.
Leela grabs Bender's arm and put it in an arm lock forcing Robert's stolen wallet out of Bender's chest cavity.
Bender
Hey!
Ow!
Leela
He's very sorry!
Bender
Ow!
Leela
Say it!
Bender
I'm very sorry!
Leela lets go of Bender.
Bender
Very sorry you're ugly!
Hahahahaha!
Robert picks up his wallet and looks inside.
Cut to a close up of Robert's hands looking through the wallet.
Inside the wallet are Condoms, Money and an ATM Card.
Robert takes the condoms out of the wallet and throws the wallet to the ground.
Robert
I won't be needing that out of date money anyway.
Fry picks up the wallet and takes out Robert's ATM card.
Fry
Wait a minute, I know this bank.
Robert
You do?
Fry
Hey yeah, there's a branch over on Pieth Avenue that's always open next to that doughnut place.
It's right by the stock exchange.
Why don't we see if your account's still open.
Robert
Okay.
Int Bank Night
Robert, Fry, Leela and Bender are seen standing at a window in the bank.
Behind the window is a teller.
Robert gives the teller his ATM card.
Robert
I've had this account since I was in school, in the twenty first century.
Bank Teller
Do you still remember your details?
Robert
Yeah.
A computer keyboard comes up out of the counter in front of Robert.
Bank Teller
Alright Mr. Burrows.
Type in all your details here, including password, home address and mother's maiden name.
Robert types into the keyboard.
Bank Teller
Okay Mr. Burrows, with a balance of three hundred pounds, seventeen pence...
Robert has a smile on his face.
Robert
You guys remember me.
Bank Teller
... Plus nine hundred and ninety nine years of interest at various rates through out history, your new balance is nine hundred thousand trillion dollars.
Bender gasps and is seen fainting with his eyes rolling back and falling backwards out of shot.
Robert's smile turns into chattering teeth and manic behavior.
Robert
Ahhhhhhh, HAHAHAHA, Yes!
Oh god yes!
Robert turns to Leela and Fry seen standing behind him in shock.
Robert
That's still a lot right?
Leela
Uh huh.
Robert is seen with the world's biggest smile on his face.
Fry
With that amount of money, you actually own more than Mom!
Leela
And she's the universes richest woman.
Robert
I love this bank!
I love the future!
Leela
And you get to work as a lead guitarist slash sitcom writer.
Robert
I love my life!
Camera pans over Leela, Fry and Robert, Bender is seen passed out laying on the bank's floor.
Robert looks up to the camera.
Robert
Thank God Allah Buddha I met that hussy!
The End.
Done
That was fun.
I hope you liked my story/script.
(And just for the record, If I do choose to write anymore of these, I won't be bringing Robert back)
