Fifty shades of grey....

[Stanton Moore]

I listened to Gilbert giving it the business.^^
There are so many good books to read. Why read this? Really, why?
If you want to be turned on, go find somone to make out with. That a good start.

 

[disregard]

It's one of the many good books. Trust!

 

[Pseudo]

I don't get how it's supposed to be a great love story from what I've read about it he has severe emotional issues and she (like bella from twilight) is not much of a person.

I've read some excerpts and far from being 'hot' the sex scenes just seem cheesy and over the top.

 

[violet_crown]

Great review of the book/series

 

[93JC]

Great review of the book/series

Bravo for finding that. I especially liked the following:

I went back and counted, and kept track throughout the rest of the book, and do you have any idea how many fucking times Ana said "Oh my" in this monumentally bad missive? Do you? I'll tell you; 79! 79 motherfucking times. "He pulled me back against his chest...oh my." "He began kissing a trail down my belly, oh my." "He's an insufferable douchenozzle,oh my!" (I'm just thankful that neither lions, tigers, nor bears were brought into this mess at any point.)

I want to read this book aloud whilst doing my best impression of George Takei. Maybe when Ventrilo is up and running.

 

[Ivy]

LOL @ George Takei! He needs to do the audiobook.

 

[disregard]

Haha she does say "oh my" a lot. Okay it's a little cheesey. But I'm down with the cheese.

 

[Ivy]

I also hate that "inner goddess" thing. Say it once or twice, maybe. It seemed like it was on every page.

 

[93JC]

58 times!

 

[disregard]

But Christian! *swoon*

 

[Ivy]

Christian is a dick. What is it you find appealing about him? Did you read that review? What if he acted as much like a dick as he already does, but instead of being really really ridiculously good looking, looked like George Costanza?

 

[disregard]

If you read all three books you would not think he's a dick.

 

[violet_crown]

I also hate that "inner goddess" thing. Say it once or twice, maybe. It seemed like it was on every page.

For some reason the phrase "inner goddess" as a descriptor for her vag makes me think the guys actually fucking a lady midget in a toga that she has crammed between her thighs. Either that or vagina has a second smaller vagina inside of it that she can extend out xenomorph style.

 

[AphroditeGoneAwry]

I agree about goddess lingo. Trying to think of some more...

 

[violet_crown]

I assume that Ana's second xenomorph vagina wears a tasteful, tiny vagina toga as well, because it's a goddess after all.

I agree about goddess lingo. Trying to think of some more...

Lumsden actually kept a running tally of all the series' most recurrent (read: trite and overused) words and phrases. Here it is for the first book:

Word Count:
"Oh My" - 79
"Crap" - 101
"Jeez" - 82
"Holy (shit/fuck/crap/hell/cow/moses)" - 172
"Whoa" - 13
"Gasp" - 34
"Gasps" - 11
"Sharp Intake of Breath" - 4
"Murmur" - 68
"Murmurs" - 139
"Whisper" - 96
"Whispers" - 103
"Mutter" - 28
"Mutters" - 23
"Fifty" - 16
"Lip" - 71
"Inner goddess" - 58
"Subconscious" - 82

 

[Ivy]

If you read all three books you would not think he's a dick.

Incorrect. Or, actually, correct- I would think he was an entire bag of dicks.

Seriously. I know how the books end, I don't think it's a believable or complete redemption. I just hate that guy.

 

[AphroditeGoneAwry]

If I were developing it, I'd put microscopic suction cups all over the inside of it to suck the unsuspecting victim's member and issue all up.






did that just cum out of my mouth

 

[iwakar]

Honestly I have no idea why it has such appeal. It's not like this is the first erotic fiction to come out. Many erotic fiction titles have come out that are probably better written and they have not gotten the attention that Fifty Shades of Grey has. I suppose alot of it is just being in the right place at the right time or the author happened to know the right people in promoting the book?

I normally avoid this sort of genre but I am kind of curious about this book. Maybe just to see if it deserves all the hype it's getting. I work in a library and my library has an extremely long waiting list. We definitely aren't banning the book like some libraries are. The waiting list is so long that unless the library orders more copies, if you requested it today, you would wait about a year to get it. I'm not kidding.

All the same applies here at my library too. Some of the librarians checked it out to see what the fuss was about and were disappointed, so I won't bother.

 

[93JC]

For some reason the phrase "inner goddess" as a descriptor for her vag makes me think the guys actually fucking a lady midget in a toga that she has crammed between her thighs. Either that or vagina has a second smaller vagina inside of it that she can extend out xenomorph style.

Maybe I should read this book. I thought "inner goddess" was just a metaphor for, like... the uninhibited part of her psyche that thinks fucking is a jolly grand idea. I didn't realize it meant small toga-clad inner xenomorph vagina.

 

[Ginkgo]

*clears throat*

Douchecanoe.

That is all.